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Tentative decision in Abbie Dorn case
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Anonymous
Knowing is not the same as seeing for a child. Many parents would not bring children to view an open casket for that reason. To me, it is better that they watch videos of a healthy mom than live with the image of her brain dead before they are intellectually capable of handling it. I would never want this for my children if I was in this state. |
Anonymous
8:57 here. Very good point. I think that the father feels the same way and is trying to act accordingly. The grandparents are going out of their way to make him out to be an unfeeling jackass, but I don't think they really are considering if it's really in the triplets interest to expose them to their mother before they are capable of handling what happened to her. I feel terrible for all of them. |
Anonymous
I have a friend who recovered from a coma when doctors all the time said he would never come back. He even wrote a book about his experience when he could hear, see and feel everything while people thought he was a "vegetable". It is about the mom, the dad and the children. That's why it should not be up to strangers to decide. This man is a selfish asshole who abandoned his wife when she needed him the most. He should rot and I feel for the children being raised by such a cold and selfish person. |
Anonymous
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Apparently the children like visiting the mom.
And the court also ordered the dad to start a "remembrance shelf" for the mom in the home with photos and mementos of the mom. I can't believe the father didn't have these items already. Was he pretending the children came out of his forehead? |
Anonymous
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It sounds like the court ruled very judiciously (both by restricting the grandmother's tendency to inflate expectations for her daughter's recovery and by ordering the father to make sure the kids know about their mother.) What is sad is that it took a judge to really think about the kids' best interests.
I totally get the sensitivities around bringing young kids to see someone in a condition that they cannot understand. On the other hand, I also think it would almost inevitably screw the kids up to keep them from her forever. Think how you'd feel if you discovered your mother had essentially given her life for your birth, and yet you never had the opportunity to show her compassion and love by simply being with her in her compromised state. |
Anonymous
| If the kids had been visiting with their mother all along, it would be normal for them and not scary. I believe even the profoundly disabled should have the right to visit with their children. To say otherwise is abhorrent. |
Anonymous
Bu she is not conscious. This is not any old disability. She is not going to know she was there. |
Anonymous
BULLSHIT! She cried every time the kids came over. And who knows if she's not really there? I'm the poster who wrote about a friend in a coma writing a book with his experiences during that period. He could describe in detail the surgeries he went through and conversations ppl had while "he was not there". My heart goes out to her, poor woman. |
Anonymous
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12:56 I disagree. It is very upsetting for children to see anyone in this state or even in higher functioning states. Plus the distance, once a year. What a heartbreaking situations. Also, we do not know what the mother wants. Maybe to spare the children.
The father sounds like an asshole. No other word for it. Not for the divorce. But trying to erase the memory of the mother. Twisted. |
Anonymous
| Agree with PP's, the father is an asshole. |