Forum Index
»
Off-Topic
Doctors, what would you like to tell your patients, but can't.
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
If you're serious, I don't understand why. If you are trying to be funny, it isn't working. |
Anonymous
| Is "delightful" a code word? As in "I had the pleasure of meeting this delightful family..." |
Anonymous
|
Dr.: What do you think could be causing all these strange symptoms?
Me: Scurvy Dr.: Why would you say that? Me: Because it's funny. That was my exchange with the infectious disease doctor, about 10 doctors into trying to find a diagnosis for strange neurological symptoms. They never gave a diagnosis, but agreed Lyme disease seemed like the most likely answer. I was the one to suggest it might be Lyme disease. I was only sent to the infectious disease guy because one NP insisted it must be a STD, even though I was tested for everything a month prior at the fertility clinic's request and a lesbian in a monogamous relationship. Most of the doctors I saw during that ordeal did nothing more than waste my time and money. |
Anonymous
|
Unfortunately, not ONE doctor has answered on this thread, probably because of the crass nature of some of the responses (chiropractor for one, BTW they are NOT medical doctors).
|
Anonymous
I always write "difficult" in the file when cranky women ask too many questions. I hate the fat ones and resent that I have to touch them. I want only affluent, clean, fit patients with good insurance. |
Anonymous
So gross. |
Anonymous
|
That my daughter used a pacifier until she was 3 years old.
That I rocked my daughter to sleep with a bottle and that she slept on her stomach. That even after all these years, I still think every baby that comes into my office is amazing. |
Anonymous
I totally heart you, PP.  That's exactly the kind of exchange I would have with my doctor. (I once asked my dentist how many instruments he's gotten in someone's mouth at once. He stopped and thought about it, then consulted his hygienist. I don't recall the answer, but it was a fun moment.)
|
Anonymous
|
My jokes always fall flat with doctors. It's like they check their sense of humor at the door. I guess they're terrified of offending someone and getting sued. But because I deal with stress through humor, not being able to joke with the doctor increases my anxiety, which contributes to my preference for Dr. Google.
I was lucky to find an OBGYN who "got" me. Haven't been so lucky in other encounters. |
Anonymous
Do you write "pleasant" in the file if you have a nice, easy patient? |
Anonymous
That's sweet! You sound like a great doctor! |
Anonymous
|
I do tell you to eat fruits and vegetables, maintain a healthy weight, and exercise. All good things, all things everyone should be doing.
What I don't tell you is that lots of people do all these things and still get cancer. And heart disease. And plenty of other things. No one wants to hear it, but it's true. A lot of it is genetics. A Whole Foods diet is good for you, but it won't save you if your genes have determined that you are going to get aggressive breast cancer. Get your mammograms, get your pap smears, get your yearly physicals. It's your best shot. |
Anonymous
I was told the same thing by a gynecologist friend. It is gross...but frankly if you look around the waiting room sometimes it looks like some of the people haven't showered in days. Hell---not only is there a shower immediately before any appt....I even make sure I have a fresh pedicure. |
Anonymous
Can you be my doctor? |
Anonymous
|
I had an ob-gyn who had never heard that caffeine is bad for pregnancy and when I asked about alcohol said "oh, some of these people come in here at 8 weeks smelling like booze and never even knowing they're pregnant!"
I much preferred the ob I switched to who treated us like the educated adults we are who are capable of reading peer-reviewed medical journal articles and talking about the implications of the research. |