Shell-shocked student - on to Deal?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not firsthand, but a number of my child's friends went to Deal and had amazing experiences. I did not hear a single complaint. They divide the school into teams of 100, so you get to work with a small group. Have you been? Has DC done a shadow day?

When someone describes a school as AMAZING i stop listening. Its saying that they are not going to give a balanced analysis of the school. No school is amazing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry for your experience. Parents at these schools always give glowing reviews publicly. That is, at least until they get their child into the private/charter/suburban school of their choice. No one seems to want to admit that even the best DCPS schools just aren't very good. You're right -- you will consistently hear just how wonderful your local school is...until you enroll your child. It's almost like the parents do not want the air the "dirty laundry" in public. Once you arrive at one of these elementary schools, it doesn't take long to discover they are sub-par and most of the parents with any means are long-gone or working every angle to get their kids out of the system. I'm sorry you made this move only to learn this sad reality after the fact.

Once I hear rhetoric like this, I stop listening. Truth is, most public/charter middle schools are somewhere in between amazing and "just aren't very good" with some much closer to amazing and some much closer to the above bolded. Deal is closer to amazing, but no school is perfect so I am sure one could find something not to like. Our DC is very happy there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry for your experience. Parents at these schools always give glowing reviews publicly. That is, at least until they get their child into the private/charter/suburban school of their choice. No one seems to want to admit that even the best DCPS schools just aren't very good. You're right -- you will consistently hear just how wonderful your local school is...until you enroll your child. It's almost like the parents do not want the air the "dirty laundry" in public. Once you arrive at one of these elementary schools, it doesn't take long to discover they are sub-par and most of the parents with any means are long-gone or working every angle to get their kids out of the system. I'm sorry you made this move only to learn this sad reality after the fact.

I so agree with this comment and at our good upper NW DCPS the refusal to speak openly about what was really going on at the school and how to ameliorate it even extended to the internal dialogue about the school among principal, PTA and LSRT. So sad. I can only say listen to what your gut ( or your child's gut) is telling you.

Thank you. This is, in my opinion, a real problem at the "good" NW DCPS schools. I think the OP's post speaks to this issue, which is why I posted as I did. I "feel her pain" as they say. Some other comments of this thread speak to the fact that some kids can have good (amazing!) experiences in DCPS -- to that I say: great, I'm glad for that outcome. However, that doesn't diminish the truth of the matter that at many of these schools, the status quo is to act/say/pretend that everything is great: "we have a great community in our school" "our active PTA makes up for the problems of DCPS" and on and on. However, many find that these are empty sentiments that just can't make up for a lack of curriculum, no differentiation, and an attitude that "good enough is good enough." To add insult to injury, many find that after a year or two at one of these schools, a funny thing happens: lots of those school-booster-PTA-auction-chair-executive committee members have been working every angle they have to bail their kids out of this "amazing!" system. They usually don't mention their plans to bail until their DC has been accepted to their new (amazing!) private.
I think it's fair to at least make note of this particular NW phenomenon -- that way, some of the new DCPS parents, like the OP, won't be so surprised when the reality doesn't match the hype.

[Anonymous]

It's also the case that some privates are better for different types of kids -- or a kid is happier at one private than at another - not to say either school is bad.

It's like choosing a college - different types (large/small, big city/big campus, humanities/science focus) appeal to different people.

This is typical when you have choices.

[Anonymous]

Do you think that this phenomenon does not occur in private schools? I would think that a $30,000/year/child investment might influence what a parent might say about their child's school. Who wants to admit they are spending that kind of money on something that they are not ecstatic about? Probably only the ridiculously wealthy and they are likely not on this board No school, public or private is perfect. Find what works best for your kid and support that. OP-it sounds like your current situation is not working for your child. Investigate your options and make the best decision you can with what you learn. Take the cr@p on this thread with a grain of salt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry for your experience. Parents at these schools always give glowing reviews publicly. That is, at least until they get their child into the private/charter/suburban school of their choice. No one seems to want to admit that even the best DCPS schools just aren't very good. You're right -- you will consistently hear just how wonderful your local school is...until you enroll your child. It's almost like the parents do not want the air the "dirty laundry" in public. Once you arrive at one of these elementary schools, it doesn't take long to discover they are sub-par and most of the parents with any means are long-gone or working every angle to get their kids out of the system. I'm sorry you made this move only to learn this sad reality after the fact.

I so agree with this comment and at our good upper NW DCPS the refusal to speak openly about what was really going on at the school and how to ameliorate it even extended to the internal dialogue about the school among principal, PTA and LSRT. So sad. I can only say listen to what your gut ( or your child's gut) is telling you.

Thank you. This is, in my opinion, a real problem at the "good" NW DCPS schools. I think the OP's post speaks to this issue, which is why I posted as I did. I "feel her pain" as they say. Some other comments of this thread speak to the fact that some kids can have good (amazing!) experiences in DCPS -- to that I say: great, I'm glad for that outcome. However, that doesn't diminish the truth of the matter that at many of these schools, the status quo is to act/say/pretend that everything is great: "we have a great community in our school" "our active PTA makes up for the problems of DCPS" and on and on. However, many find that these are empty sentiments that just can't make up for a lack of curriculum, no differentiation, and an attitude that "good enough is good enough." To add insult to injury, many find that after a year or two at one of these schools, a funny thing happens: lots of those school-booster-PTA-auction-chair-executive committee members have been working every angle they have to bail their kids out of this "amazing!" system. They usually don't mention their plans to bail until their DC has been accepted to their new (amazing!) private.
I think it's fair to at least make note of this particular NW phenomenon -- that way, some of the new DCPS parents, like the OP, won't be so surprised when the reality doesn't match the hype.

NP here. Thank you. I definitely did not fall in love with a certain upper NW JKLM school. The fact that everyone else was talking it up made me feel like there was something wrong with me for not "getting it". This helps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you. This is, in my opinion, a real problem at the "good" NW DCPS schools. I think the OP's post speaks to this issue, which is why I posted as I did. I "feel her pain" as they say. Some other comments of this thread speak to the fact that some kids can have good (amazing!) experiences in DCPS -- to that I say: great, I'm glad for that outcome. However, that doesn't diminish the truth of the matter that at many of these schools, the status quo is to act/say/pretend that everything is great: "we have a great community in our school" "our active PTA makes up for the problems of DCPS" and on and on. However, many find that these are empty sentiments that just can't make up for a lack of curriculum, no differentiation, and an attitude that "good enough is good enough." To add insult to injury, many find that after a year or two at one of these schools, a funny thing happens: lots of those school-booster-PTA-auction-chair-executive committee members have been working every angle they have to bail their kids out of this "amazing!" system. They usually don't mention their plans to bail until their DC has been accepted to their new (amazing!) private.
I think it's fair to at least make note of this particular NW phenomenon -- that way, some of the new DCPS parents, like the OP, won't be so surprised when the reality doesn't match the hype.

There are way too many generalizations in your statements. You lose credibility when you call it a phenomenon in NW because you yourself have not experienced every DCPS in upper NW. And if you are using the comments posted on this board as your barometer, that's just foolish. I think it's insulting to say that folks just go along with the status quo or buy in to some sort of hype. My child's education is important to me and I'm not going to go along to get along. If it doesn't work we move on. Right now it works well.

[Anonymous]

Having spent time at the Capitol Hill Cluster School, I have to say it's not just an upper NW situation.

The Cluster School has had a committed group of parents who are willing to work hard to make the school the best it can be. However, despite over 20 years of effort, the school is still middling at best.

What I observed, as a parent, was a sense of "drinking the Koolaid."

If you didn't think the school was utterly divine, you were pretty much shut out and shut down.

I'm all for celebrating successes, but when the frenzy to exclaim how "amazing" the school is, is the only sound you hear, it's a problem.

For example, at Watkins ES, if you walk the hallways, you can hear adults yelling at kids. These are children in the 1st through 4th grade being subject to treatment that you would expect from a drill sergeant in basic training. It's horrifying.

If you dare bring this up (in the nicest, most constructive way possible) with PTA or school leadership, you are shut out.

It's a shame, because the problems never, ever get fixed.

Again, I'm all for celebrating what works at your school. I'm also a strong believer in recognizing that no school, especially a DCPS, is even close to perfect. There is work to be done, but the first step is, as they say, admitting you have a problem.

[Anonymous]

We (meaning parents and child) really liked one DCPS elementary, did not like another, and currently really like our Middle School Charter. It came down to the community feel - which is subjective- the peer group - also subjective- and the curriculum - also subjective. The curriculum at charter versus public is not necessarily better, just different. So you need to evaluate it for yourself and your comfort level/what you are looking for. There is a little more continuity from public school to public school, but even they can be pretty different in approach and implementation depending on leadership and the community of teachers who shape the program.
I can confidently say that two of the schools our child attended were amazing -- but this is subjective. Our kid is growing exactly how we would envision--and I credit good school experiences with that wholesome, educated path. The one school that didn't work for us is possibly the most coveted elementary in DC. It did not work for our family and we voted with our feet. That's not to say it isn't amazing for another family.

[Anonymous]

Name the schools, please.

If those of you claiming that upper NW parents are either drinking the coolaid or secretly eager to get their kids into privates are really parents (or former parents) at these schools, name the school where you had that experience.

Frankly, I'm calling BS if you don't.

[Anonymous]

op, you might want to narrow your filter for parent comments to those who have first-and experience with more than one middle school. You meentioned leaving an "excellent" charter for JKLM. What are your criteria for excellent?

[Anonymous]

OP didn't say JKLM. She said school in NW. Shephard feeds to Deal, doesn't it?

[Anonymous]

It's easy to say that parents should vote-with-their-feet by going charter, private or moving. That's not realistic. Parents should be able to air legit concerns about their schools (yes, even the so-called "best" ones) without being, as one poster said, shut-down and shut-out. Truly great schools (and great PTAs and great principals) are able to accommodate constructive criticism.
Parents like the OP, have every right to question their schools and expect positive results. They also have the right to expect their PTA to work hard to make sure these schools are excellent (rather than just pretending that it is so). True, no school is perfect, but the ongoing pretense at some of the JKLMs is jarring to many parents once they see the reality.

[Anonymous]

I think it's fair to at least make note of this particular NW phenomenon -- that way, some of the new DCPS parents, like the OP, won't be so surprised when the reality doesn't match the hype.


NP here. Thank you. I definitely did not fall in love with a certain upper NW JKLM school. The fact that everyone else was talking it up made me feel like there was something wrong with me for not "getting it". This helps.

nnp here: It is worth noting that this drinking Kool-Aid isn't a phenomenon limited to Janney, Lafayette, and affluent DCPS schools.

It most certainly happens in close-in Mont.Co. schools in Chevy Chase and Bethesda (Wood Acres, Westbrook, Rosemary Hills and Bethesda ES, for example.) Well, I"m just basing this comment on a sample of 3 or 4, but I bet my brutally honest friends aren't alone in their opinions in 20815.

What is worse, almost all the families in these schools affirmatively moved away from their house in the District once X hit 4 years old, so they could take advantage of the perceived awesomeness of these Mont.Co schools. So you can never comfortably announce, Wow, this place sucks in many ways. Once you're invested with your new family room addition, it's hard to admit your school isn't "amazing."

[Anonymous]

Agreed. I think this can happen anywhere, no school is perfect. The difference with you schools you mention, however, is that those schools have a record of objective achievements. It seems the DC schools we're discussing can't compete on that objective measurement -- which is why pretending they are "amazing" is all the more damaging.