College and dyslexia.

[Anonymous]

OP, I have a dyslexic kid who *is* a top performer and has the stats to “buy” a ticket to the top school lotteries, and isn’t doing it. They aren’t a good fit, even if DC has the HS stats for them. DC wants a smaller, supportive school with the opportunity to develop personal relationships with professors, and is looking at a range of LACs (we’re also looking for merit aid).

There’s no need to join the rat race, whether because your smart, creative, funny kid doesn’t quite have the stats or because your kid with the stats just isn’t interested. Your kid sounds great, and there are plenty of strong schools that will recognize that and where he’ll thrive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS is a HS junior with dyslexia and I can’t relate to OP.

WTH, OP? This is life and you work with what you have. Honestly, you should have gotten over all this nonsense a long time ago.

Resilience, perseverance, and accountability. That’s the focus. Where is your head?

Well aren't you enlightened. Sheesh! And what does "Accountability" mean in this context?

It means showing up.

OP is too old of an SN parent for this crap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS is a HS junior with dyslexia and I can’t relate to OP.

WTH, OP? This is life and you work with what you have. Honestly, you should have gotten over all this nonsense a long time ago.

Resilience, perseverance, and accountability. That’s the focus. Where is your head?

Well aren't you enlightened. Sheesh! And what does "Accountability" mean in this context?

It means showing up.

OP is too old of an SN parent for this crap.

You seem charming, compassionate, and kind! Wow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC's close friend is a highly performing and artistic student with dyslexia attending a T20 school with full tuition ride.

That’s great! Good for them!

OP’s kid is not an academic superstar and she is agonizing about the fact that he isn’t, worried that going to a T20 (or Twhatever) is a measure of or necessary step to the good life.

That way madness lies. OP needs help seeing all the possible ways a dyslexic person (any person, really) can thrive and succeed, so she can support her son and not fear for him. There is nothing in her description of him to fear.

PP you responded too. You made good points, but let me share something else: DC's close friend got their T-20 full tuition ride based on their artistic and leadership abilities, not scholastic abilities (applied TO since SAT well below that school's stats). My point is that OP's DS has other gifts beyond scholastic achievements and she should not presume that her son's college future is not as bright.

[Anonymous]

Why would you want him at a top school anyhow? So he can be under even more pressure to perform?

There are so many other options, especially if he's lucky enough to know what he wants to do:

Emerson
Chapman
Loyola Marymount
UNC of the arts
Syracuse
Ithaca
FSU

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I have a dyslexic kid who *is* a top performer and has the stats to “buy” a ticket to the top school lotteries, and isn’t doing it. They aren’t a good fit, even if DC has the HS stats for them. DC wants a smaller, supportive school with the opportunity to develop personal relationships with professors, and is looking at a range of LACs (we’re also looking for merit aid).

There’s no need to join the rat race, whether because your smart, creative, funny kid doesn’t quite have the stats or because your kid with the stats just isn’t interested. Your kid sounds great, and there are plenty of strong schools that will recognize that and where he’ll thrive.

This poster has it right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC's close friend is a highly performing and artistic student with dyslexia attending a T20 school with full tuition ride.

That’s great! Good for them!

OP’s kid is not an academic superstar and she is agonizing about the fact that he isn’t, worried that going to a T20 (or Twhatever) is a measure of or necessary step to the good life.

That way madness lies. OP needs help seeing all the possible ways a dyslexic person (any person, really) can thrive and succeed, so she can support her son and not fear for him. There is nothing in her description of him to fear.

PP you responded too. You made good points, but let me share something else: DC's close friend got their T-20 full tuition ride based on their artistic and leadership abilities, not scholastic abilities (applied TO since SAT well below that school's stats). My point is that OP's DS has other gifts beyond scholastic achievements and she should not presume that her son's college future is not as bright.

Absolutely, if he has a 3.8 GPA or something he should shoot high as high as he wants, relying on his other strengths to give him a boost. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses.

But I’m assuming OP’s kid is like my dyslexic kid - his dyslexia makes school hard, and because it has been so hard and frustrating for so long he is cynical about it and doesn’t do everything he needs to do to get high grades - he’d have to work a lot harder than other kids, and he isn’t willing. So B’s it is.

And you know what? B’s will get you into hundreds of interesting, challenging, colleges where a kid can thrive. Both paths are great. You just need to recognize which kid you have.

[Anonymous]

My close friend's dyslexic, artsy kid is thriving at Syracuse. Got in with Bs and a great portfolio (acting).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC's close friend is a highly performing and artistic student with dyslexia attending a T20 school with full tuition ride.

That’s great! Good for them!

OP’s kid is not an academic superstar and she is agonizing about the fact that he isn’t, worried that going to a T20 (or Twhatever) is a measure of or necessary step to the good life.

That way madness lies. OP needs help seeing all the possible ways a dyslexic person (any person, really) can thrive and succeed, so she can support her son and not fear for him. There is nothing in her description of him to fear.

PP you responded too. You made good points, but let me share something else: DC's close friend got their T-20 full tuition ride based on their artistic and leadership abilities, not scholastic abilities (applied TO since SAT well below that school's stats). My point is that OP's DS has other gifts beyond scholastic achievements and she should not presume that her son's college future is not as bright.

Absolutely, if he has a 3.8 GPA or something he should shoot high as high as he wants, relying on his other strengths to give him a boost. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses.

But I’m assuming OP’s kid is like my dyslexic kid - his dyslexia makes school hard, and because it has been so hard and frustrating for so long he is cynical about it and doesn’t do everything he needs to do to get high grades - he’d have to work a lot harder than other kids, and he isn’t willing. So B’s it is.

And you know what? B’s will get you into hundreds of interesting, challenging, colleges where a kid can thrive. Both paths are great. You just need to recognize which kid you have.

PP. Rooting for your kid - all the best with his college prospects!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC's close friend is a highly performing and artistic student with dyslexia attending a T20 school with full tuition ride.

That’s great! Good for them!

OP’s kid is not an academic superstar and she is agonizing about the fact that he isn’t, worried that going to a T20 (or Twhatever) is a measure of or necessary step to the good life.

That way madness lies. OP needs help seeing all the possible ways a dyslexic person (any person, really) can thrive and succeed, so she can support her son and not fear for him. There is nothing in her description of him to fear.

PP you responded too. You made good points, but let me share something else: DC's close friend got their T-20 full tuition ride based on their artistic and leadership abilities, not scholastic abilities (applied TO since SAT well below that school's stats). My point is that OP's DS has other gifts beyond scholastic achievements and she should not presume that her son's college future is not as bright.

Absolutely, if he has a 3.8 GPA or something he should shoot high as high as he wants, relying on his other strengths to give him a boost. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses.

But I’m assuming OP’s kid is like my dyslexic kid - his dyslexia makes school hard, and because it has been so hard and frustrating for so long he is cynical about it and doesn’t do everything he needs to do to get high grades - he’d have to work a lot harder than other kids, and he isn’t willing. So B’s it is.

And you know what? B’s will get you into hundreds of interesting, challenging, colleges where a kid can thrive. Both paths are great. You just need to recognize which kid you have.

PP. Rooting for your kid - all the best with his college prospects!

Thank you! He’s actually just home from his first year at a fabulous but not very selective college. He floundered his first semester a bit, pulled it together and did well. He came home a new man. So he’s doing great!

Just an FYI for parents of dyslexic kids…some professors are requiring all work to be hand written to defeat AI. Since spelling is a real problem for dyslexics this is hard. My son refused to register with the disability office, so he didn’t get a typing accommodation. He did fine anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS is a HS junior with dyslexia and I can’t relate to OP.

WTH, OP? This is life and you work with what you have. Honestly, you should have gotten over all this nonsense a long time ago.

Resilience, perseverance, and accountability. That’s the focus. Where is your head?

Well aren't you enlightened. Sheesh! And what does "Accountability" mean in this context?

It means showing up.

OP is too old of an SN parent for this crap.

You seem charming, compassionate, and kind! Wow.

OP doesn’t need compassion. She needs to grow up. She has a great kid who also has a learning disability. He’ll do fine and work with his strengths.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I have a dyslexic kid who *is* a top performer and has the stats to “buy” a ticket to the top school lotteries, and isn’t doing it. They aren’t a good fit, even if DC has the HS stats for them. DC wants a smaller, supportive school with the opportunity to develop personal relationships with professors, and is looking at a range of LACs (we’re also looking for merit aid).

There’s no need to join the rat race, whether because your smart, creative, funny kid doesn’t quite have the stats or because your kid with the stats just isn’t interested. Your kid sounds great, and there are plenty of strong schools that will recognize that and where he’ll thrive.

This poster has it right.

+1. It is completely natural to experience a period of grief when processing a child's learning disability diagnosis. Navigating those "what if" thoughts is a shared part of the journey. What matters most is shifting focus toward being their fiercest advocate and reminding them that success comes in many forms. Protect their self-esteem by focusing on their passions. Utilize accommodations - tools like text-to-speech software and E-readers to level the playing field, advocate for extended time on tests, oral instead of written responses, and quiet study spaces. Know your kid, know what works for them and what doesn't and try to find a fit for that - you may be surprised to see all they can accomplish when they have your 100% support. It's time for the OP to shift the spotlight entirely to their kid's direct experience and well-being as a way to help them thrive.