What are parents afraid of their kids reading?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it depends on your kid. My 4th grade boy read all the Hunger Games and Harry Potter, and didn't express any problem with them.

I mean, yeah, duh, thats what this thread is about. Parents should know what may cause a problem for their kids. Hopefully you at least gave your son the option not to read it if it was troubling to him, rather than assuming all books were good for all kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it depends on your kid. My 4th grade boy read all the Hunger Games and Harry Potter, and didn't express any problem with them.

I mean, yeah, duh, thats what this thread is about. Parents should know what may cause a problem for their kids. Hopefully you at least gave your son the option not to read it if it was troubling to him, rather than assuming all books were good for all kids.

There's also way more books out there than the Hunger Games and Harry Potter. Those books are pretty easy for parents to figure out because at this point most people know their content, themes, specific stuff that might be scare or problematic for some kids.

I doubt that was the book the mom described in the OP was rejecting for her kid. It was probably something less well known but that she knew wasn't appropriate for that particular kid to read at that particular time. It could really be anything, too. I know parents who used to refuse to let their little kids read Junie B. Jones books because they felt the kids had bad attitudes and didn't like when they'd used incorrect grammar. Which I think are valid reasons not to give your kid a book. OP framed it as what are you "afraid" of your kid reading like the mom was some book banner terrified of her child being exposed to new ideas. More likely the mom just knew the book had lots of graphic violence or portrayed kids being jerks to each other or something, and was like "omg no."

Not all books are good, and not all books are good for every kid.

[Anonymous]

My parents let me read whatever I wanted. They didn't know that some books I got my hands on were really inappropriate. Like the books of the Marquis de Sade (where the word sadism originates). I doubt any child in a public library would easily access something like that... but even with less iNteRestIng content, a child can be easily traumatized.

I let my children read whatever the heck they wanted, knowing that when they were younger, all they could access was perfectly decent stuff.

[Anonymous]

I wonder if this is more a discussion of what is appropriate rather than censorship. It could be content that a parent thinks her kid isn't ready for, it might not have been a parent as suspected, it could be something for a school book report that seems controversial for any reason. Hope for the best, OP, and celebrate a kid at the library.

[Anonymous]

When our 4th grader wanted to read The Hunger Games because everyone else was, I read them first. And then I spoke to the school reading specialist, because I thought the themes were too mature. She told me [am paraphrasing, becaus that kid is out of college now and my memory isn't what it was], if your kid is interested in reading, let them read. If they don't understand something, it'll go over their head, and if they are interested, they'll ask you about it. If they already "get it," it's not too mature for them.

I've always gone with that strategy, and all 3 of our kids were and are voracious readers who have done well inside of school and outside of school

[Anonymous]

I don't censor my kids' book choices but I will talk to them about books they are reading that might have more mature or controversial content. Sometimes my kids don't even pick up on the more mature/controversial themes; other times they do and we have interesting conversations.

[Anonymous]

Some much YA literature is garbage now.

[Anonymous]

I recommended a friend not allow her 4th grader who loves ice skating to read Ice Breaker which is an adult romance novel with explicit sex scenes. Not because I think those books should be banned, just that I think they aren’t for 4th graders.

[Anonymous]

Too many creepy weirdos like OP at the library these days, concerning themselves with 11 yr old kids.

[Anonymous]

I'm worried about my kids finding my police record on the dark web someday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So I was at the library the other day and a girl who looked about 11 years old came in with a woman who was presumably her mom. She picked out a book for school her and brought it to her mom and her mom kept insisting the book is inappropriate and wouldn't let her check out the book. Just why. What the fuсk was she afraid of her kid reading? It's not like she was checking out a porn magazine.

What was the book?

[Anonymous]

OP, was the mom trying to censor what you were reading? If not, why is this your business?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it depends on whether your kid is reading at grade level or not. When I was in elementary school, everybody (teachers, parents, school librarians, public librarians etc) was so excited about how far above grade level my reading skills were, and kept challenging me with “harder” material that I was definitely not emotionally or psychologically ready for. In hindsight I was definitely very behind on the social-emotional scale. There are things I read when I was eight, ten, twelve….that just shattered my heart, terrified me, made me feel uncomfortable and alone, and therefore ashamed, and have stuck with me through the decades. As a kid I was unable to express these feelings, and adults just saw a “very smart” young girl who understood and was stoic and seemed unbothered and “wise beyond her years” etc. about what she was reading. I wish I’d had more guardrails

THIS. I have a 3rd grader who reads at a middle school level. She reads grade level stuff but she churns through it fast and she needs longer, meatier books to keep her interested and occupied with reading. It's hard because I'm not going to read every freaking YA novel myself, so I read a lot of reviews, get recommendations from friends with older kids where I can vet for specific content based on what I think she'd be ready for, etc. There are lots of books that would be okay for a 12 year old but not for an 8 year old. I will say that DD actually will speak up sometimes when she feels a book feels too adult for her, but I feel like I need to be involved too, talking through it, it's not fair for an 8 year old to just have to navigate that on her own.

I was also a super advanced and voracious reader at a young age and I read a ton of inappropriate stuff, mostly from my parents home library, at age 8/9/10. Including my mom's extensive collection of trashy crime novels that included violent descriptions of like prostitutes being murdered. And my mom had read those books and knew I was reading them and didn't even stop to have a convo with me about what was in them. The ridiculous part is my mom was super uncomfortable talking to me about sex or puberty or relationships, too, so basically she knowingly let me learn a lot about those topics from trashy novels but was too embarrassed to talk them through or even check with me on how I was handling all that adult content.

I guess the cool thing now is to just let your kids consume whatever media they want but I feel like this is really lazy parenting and it's worth it to put in a little more effort than that.

What did you expect from her. Everything she knew about sex, puberty, and relationships was probably from those same books, so she wouldn’t have had anything to add. At least she made sure to pass on the knowledge that she knew, and she should be applauded for that. It’s hard being a mom.

[Anonymous]

Don’t censor your kids. I can see the point of a PP saying my kid is 7 or 8 and will have nightmares. But by 11, let it go. Let them read. They’ll be fine.

[Anonymous]

For the elementary school set, sex scenes. That’s what I watched out for. And those scenes are definitely in YA. Kids 10 and under are too young for that material, IMO. If you don’t want them to watch explicit sex scenes on tv, maybe you don’t want them in book form either.