Co-Worker applying for jobs

[Anonymous]

I'm pretty close with my supervisor; we've been working together for almost 30 years, and she's a really great person who's always supported me and had my back. With that said, one of our team members asked me to be a reference for her, and I said yes without hesitation. It never occurred to me to tell my supervisor that it seems like a really messed-up thing to do. It did suck for a bit because the rest of the team had to absorb her work. It was about 2 months before someone else was hired, fully trained, and working independently.

I don't see the issue here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had to ask my current coworker/supervisor to be a reference. She was annoyed to be losing me but I promised that I would try to negotiate as late a starting date as possible so as to have ample time to wrap up. I got 3 weeks and worked that whole time and left detailed instructions about my job.
Maybe you could ask for the same?

OP is nasty and vindictive so I doubt she wants to be reasonable about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you're asking us if you should be a vindictive bitc8 and get your coworker fired before she found abother job? May you encounter the same karma when you decide to leave your job.

Oh the "Karma" is already coming my way as I will be stuck doing her job.
Ideally, she would give enough notice to train someone or as other suggested write down and document all her duties/task, which she hasn't and I don't think she plans to do it either.

My concern is knowing about it and not saying anything...

Tell her you will do it and highlight her professionalism in preparing transition aids for the team...after she has done that. Otherwise get your spite out by saying no but if you rat her out that is not going to get you long term brownie points. Everyone will know including your bosses.

[Anonymous]

OP your coworker could quit today or get hit by a bus. Or you could. People would have to absorb load until replacement on board. That's why it's called "work."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't say this often, or lightly, but you're a shitty person.

She's got a crap job, she's trying to get out of it, she's asking you to be a reference and your response is to consider TELLING ON HER because if she leaves, you'll have more work??

The correct response is "Of course! Best of luck on your search! If someone calls me, is there anything in particular you'd like me to emphasize?"

If your company is so poorly run that you're preemptively stressing out about the amount of work you'll have to do if someone else leaves, then you should either be working to fix that because you're understaffed, setting more limits at work, or looking for a new job yourself. People leave jobs, everyone adjusts, a new hire comes in, everyone adjusts. You'll live. It's not that big a deal. Be grateful you've got an extra heads up, and if you DO get called for a reference, give a great one and then go to her and say "I gave you a really good reference, I hope you get the job! I'm going to miss you around here. I will say, I'm starting to get stressed about the extra work - will you do me a favor and start working on your documentation? That would really help me out."

I'm sure she'll give two weeks notice, which is prime time for documentation, and if you help her out and ask her, she'll probably pay even more attention to it.

You might want to do a little introspection as to why you're so self-centered that you're considering blowing up someone's career and/or livelihood to prevent a couple months of being busy at the office.

Perfect post. 100% agree to everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My co-worker hates her job and casually asked me if she can put me as reference for jobs she's applying elsewhere. We have work in the same team for about two years now and we get alone pretty well, however, if she leaves with short notice, her duties will fall into me and it will take months to train a new person.

I know she's looking out for herself and I'd rather stay out of it, however, I will be directly affected by her sudden departure.
Since I know of her plans, should I say something to our supervisor, who I am close with?
I feel awful knowing she's planning on leaving and I'm stressing I will have to take over her duties as well.

You should be mad at your supervisor; it’s there job to adequately staff and have resources to handle departures.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you're asking us if you should be a vindictive bitc8 and get your coworker fired before she found abother job? May you encounter the same karma when you decide to leave your job.

Oh the "Karma" is already coming my way as I will be stuck doing her job.
Ideally, she would give enough notice to train someone or as other suggested write down and document all her duties/task, which she hasn't and I don't think she plans to do it either.

My concern is knowing about it and not saying anything...

Your employer is not going to hire anyone in time for her to train, and that is their fault not hers.
After she leaves, you can choose to keep doing one FTE of work and let your boss figure out the backup. Being a martyr about it is your fault not your coworker's.
I don't believe you're actually concerned about your boss finding out that you knew, but no reasonable boss gets mad about that. It would be incredibly weird for you to tattle and your boss knows that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So you're asking us if you should be a vindictive bitc8 and get your coworker fired before she found abother job? May you encounter the same karma when you decide to leave your job.

You are horrible. At some point I was having a tough time at a place I worked with, and a coworker who knew I was looking left a clip of a very good opportunity - that I ended up getting. Just wow.

[Anonymous]

OP, you sound evil... no joke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you're asking us if you should be a vindictive bitc8 and get your coworker fired before she found abother job? May you encounter the same karma when you decide to leave your job.

You are horrible. At some point I was having a tough time at a place I worked with, and a coworker who knew I was looking left a clip of a very good opportunity - that I ended up getting. Just wow.

I don't think you know how to read or completely misunderstood what I said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't say this often, or lightly, but you're a shitty person.

She's got a crap job, she's trying to get out of it, she's asking you to be a reference and your response is to consider TELLING ON HER because if she leaves, you'll have more work??

The correct response is "Of course! Best of luck on your search! If someone calls me, is there anything in particular you'd like me to emphasize?"

If your company is so poorly run that you're preemptively stressing out about the amount of work you'll have to do if someone else leaves, then you should either be working to fix that because you're understaffed, setting more limits at work, or looking for a new job yourself. People leave jobs, everyone adjusts, a new hire comes in, everyone adjusts. You'll live. It's not that big a deal. Be grateful you've got an extra heads up, and if you DO get called for a reference, give a great one and then go to her and say "I gave you a really good reference, I hope you get the job! I'm going to miss you around here. I will say, I'm starting to get stressed about the extra work - will you do me a favor and start working on your documentation? That would really help me out."

I'm sure she'll give two weeks notice, which is prime time for documentation, and if you help her out and ask her, she'll probably pay even more attention to it.

You might want to do a little introspection as to why you're so self-centered that you're considering blowing up someone's career and/or livelihood to prevent a couple months of being busy at the office.

+1 what a truly horrible person

[Anonymous]

Couldn’t you ask your supervisor to be more diligent about documenting processes in case anyone is sick or on vacation before the summertime. Don’t be messy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you're asking us if you should be a vindictive bitc8 and get your coworker fired before she found abother job? May you encounter the same karma when you decide to leave your job.

[/b]+1. Op,[b] You are horrible. At some point I was having a tough time at a place I worked with, and a coworker who knew I was looking left a clip of a very good opportunity - that I ended up getting. Just wow.

I don't think you know how to read or completely misunderstood what I said.

I was referring to op. It should have read ^^^

[Anonymous]

Not only should you not tell the boss, you should also decline to be a reference as you are not in a position to give an employer an unqualified positive reference when they call.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP your coworker could quit today or get hit by a bus. Or you could. People would have to absorb load until replacement on board. That's why it's called "work."

THIS. OP, it’s not your coworker’s problem that you will be overworked if she leaves. That’s management’s issue to figure out. You are also free to get a new job, and you should ask your coworker to give you a reference as well, if you do that.

If you were my direct report I’d give you the biggest side eye for telling me this by the way. What possible good motivation does it show? You’re not saving your boss any work—they’ll still have to find a replacement. This might make me decide you need more work now, actually, to start transitioning the workload early… just saying.