Would you have a baby with a man who cheats?
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Anonymous
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Most women have done this unknowingly, but I wouldn't do it deliberately. Donor sperm is available, as is the 'random guy from the bar' option. Honestly, your chances of finding fidelity in a relationship these days aren't great, and marriage is a scam. If you can afford a baby on your own, get pregnant. Do what you can to try to choose a decent set of paternal genes, but don't expect much from a man.
They're all pretty disappointing when it comes to raising kids. The ones that you already know are cheating aren't good dad material. If you want a baby, they'll probably function for that task. If you want your baby to have a father, well, good luck. A man who is low-integrity enough to cheat is already showing you who he prioritizes, and it isn't going to be you or your/his kid(s). And you don't get to complain about that if you went for him anyway. |
Anonymous
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Never mind if he cheat or not. Are you planning to keep him around? Does he have any SN?
Will he know about the kid? Ready to fight over the child? Go find a donor. |
Anonymous
| Only if he's a grade A sperm donor and you can get 100% custody. And don't try to have a relationship with him after the doing the deed |
Anonymous
| If Ivf is too expensive, consider how you’ll pay for a kid on one salary. Probably not a good idea. |
Anonymous
Troll hypothetical. Lame |
Anonymous
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Having a baby is hard even under the very best of circumstances. I can't imagine adding relationship drama on top of that.
I also really think the whole "last chance" thing is just facing down a decision you realistically made a long time ago. If kids were something really important to you, would you really be in a do or die situation last minute? It's normal to hesitate before making a final decision, but digging into the reasoning do you really actually want everything that comes with being a parent or are you just hesitating to commit to the call. |
Anonymous
| No. |
Anonymous
What’s his financial contribution? (My question implies yes with conditions) |
Anonymous
| No. You are setting yourself up for a life of misery |
Anonymous
This. If you think IVF is expensive look into just how much childcare costs (and multiply that by the 5 years you need before Kindergarten) and that's just the start of how expensive kids are. And with a guy who cheats you definitely can't count on child support. |
Anonymous
| Yes if he has good genes. But have him sign off on parental rights. He’d be a sperm donor. |
Anonymous
| Random guy from a bar is horribly unethical, PP. Kids go looking for their parents. Suppose that guy's later family is upset by appearance of half-sibling unknown to dad. R/npe is full of trauma of this type. |
Anonymous
| Only if you don’t mind him cheating on you? |
Anonymous
Yes, I would, especially if he had significant resources and/or good genetics (tall, handsome, smart, addiction free, no mental health issues.) |
Anonymous
| No way |