When your child is not invited to a birthday party.

[Anonymous]

This sounds like a gender separation situation. My son is 8 (9 in a few months) and the mixed gender parties stopped in 1st grade. However, my son doesn't really have anything to do with the girls in his class other than having to work with them in class. He has a very large group of friends that are all boys.

Your situation could be as simple as the gender separation, even though the birthday girl likes to hang out with your son at other times. I would chalk it up to it not being personal and this girl having an all-girl birthday party. My son has all-boy birthday parties.

[Anonymous]

Ooh agree with that point - don’t talk about events other people are not invited to and teach kids from young age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This sounds like a gender separation situation. My son is 8 (9 in a few months) and the mixed gender parties stopped in 1st grade. However, my son doesn't really have anything to do with the girls in his class other than having to work with them in class. He has a very large group of friends that are all boys.

Your situation could be as simple as the gender separation, even though the birthday girl likes to hang out with your son at other times. I would chalk it up to it not being personal and this girl having an all-girl birthday party. My son has all-boy birthday parties.

Did you even read the OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He is a little boy. To an 8 year old girl. We would need more information about the one -sole- boy invited. That's the only thing unexplained about an 8 year old girl not inviting a 6 year old boy.

I'd do your best to keep the situations separate in your mind: the neighborhood kids hanging out (at your house only if you want) and a birthday party.

So you think the blatant misandry here should just be overlooked?!?

[Anonymous]

One cannot control what others do or don’t do, regardless of whether their behavior is good, appropriate, or whatever.

One should try to control how one reacts publicly, and the best reaction sometimes is no reaction (say nothing to anyone).

[Anonymous]

My daughter just turned 8. She plays a ton with the neighbor boy who is 6. She really really likes playing with him. Still didn’t want him at her party for “8 year olds.”

Do not take this personally.

[Anonymous]

This is normal OP. Most kids can’t invite every kid they play with to their party. And when your son is turning 8 and can have x number of people to his party, he probably wont invite or prioritize all the six year old girls in the neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

what the heck, op? Your son is a different gender and 1.5 years younger! I would be surprised if he WAS invited. get over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are upset your 6yo son is not invited to an 8yo girl’s party?? It would be more upsetting if your 8yo same age same sex daughter was not invited.

I have an 8yo dd and we only invited girls and 1 boy. Every single kid was in the same grade.

I don’t think I’ve ever had a birthday party where being in the same grade was a criteria. That’s odd.

If it’s true that all the kids who play in the neighborhood were invited but him, the mother is rude and insensitive and her child is following her footsteps by discussing the party in front of someone not invited. And the birthday girl is old enough to be taught that.

Pp here. My youngest is now 8. I also have two teens and have thrown and attended a ton of birthday parties. When my boys were up to early elementary, we invited the neighbors. We invited girls, boys and siblings. We ended up moving but parties changed around age 8. Siblings no longer included. Parties were mostly drop off.

My middle child has one neighbor friend who he has always invited to his birthday party and vice versa. Of course grade is not the criteria. But if your kid already has a class of 20, soccer travel team, scouts, etc who are all in the same grade and you are trying to choose who to invite, the younger opposite sex neighbor will probably be the one to not be on the guest list. It would be far worse if neighbor was in the same grade and same school or on the same soccer team and still wasn’t invited. Opposite sex younger kid isn’t as offensive.

I’m guessing this is OP’s first or only child. Anyone with older kids will know that guest lists often get smaller as kids age. Whole classes, all the boys, entire team no longer get invited. My son had almost 50 kids at his birthday party last year. My 8yo had a smaller venue with max 16 kids so yes, we did only her grade and kids from her class and a few close friends.

[Anonymous]

All through elementary school there were girls only parties that were specific to the one grade. That was how it worked 90% of the time. My daughter made an exception for one boy that was her best friend, and it always seemed pretty likely that he would be gay (which has been confirmed as they enter high school). Last year, she made an exception for one nonbinary child she was friends with.

I don’t know any 8 year old girls that would have invited a 6.5 year old boy to their birthday party when all of her friends were that age.

[Anonymous]

Are they in the same grade?

[Anonymous]

DS was the only boy got invited to an all girl bday party, as bday girl and DS are very good friends so they made the exception, while my DD was not invited as they’re friends but not very close friends, and it’s totally fine. Just don’t think too much.

[Anonymous]

This is pretty normal. In our neighborhood all the kids play, but birthdays tend to be same age group. Do not read a lot into this if you have otherwise good relationships!

[Anonymous]

Not your true friend, move on from them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He is a little boy. To an 8 year old girl. We would need more information about the one -sole- boy invited. That's the only thing unexplained about an 8 year old girl not inviting a 6 year old boy.

I'd do your best to keep the situations separate in your mind: the neighborhood kids hanging out (at your house only if you want) and a birthday party.

So you think the blatant misandry here should just be overlooked?!?

🤣 at blatant misandry