Seriously?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I imagine there's more to this than I know so if I knew more about the context of this I might agree with you. But really, an outfit from Target for a 1-year-old is fine. Your kid has no idea how much auntie spent on that. One-year-olds just don't care about that stuff.

But if SIL is extravagant and living beyond her means I can understand being annoyed by her choices generally.

I agree with this. Sounds like there are extenuating circumstances, but generally I think a target outfit is a nice birthday gift and would be happy to get it.

[Anonymous]

Wow. Seriously? I hope your child doesn't turn out this petty.

[Anonymous]

Eh, I get it.i gave my brother and his wife a jogging stroller at their baby shower, and at mine, they gave me a 15 dollar plastic baby bathtub. And yes, I was annoyed. Maybe not the nicest of reactions, but hey, I'm not perfect. Let's not be so quick to judge that OP is a wholly overprivileged value-less person because she vented anonymously to a bulletin board about a crappy gift. Its one of those things in life that are annoying and you can't say anything to family members...but DCUM gives you an outlet!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eh, I get it.i gave my brother and his wife a jogging stroller at their baby shower, and at mine, they gave me a 15 dollar plastic baby bathtub. And yes, I was annoyed. Maybe not the nicest of reactions, but hey, I'm not perfect. Let's not be so quick to judge that OP is a wholly overprivileged value-less person because she vented anonymously to a bulletin board about a crappy gift. Its one of those things in life that are annoying and you can't say anything to family members...but DCUM gives you an outlet!

So true. I've done it myself.

[Anonymous]

Isn't it better to give than to receive?

Maybe OP can ask for the exact price so she knows how much to gift at the holidays.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eh, I get it.i gave my brother and his wife a jogging stroller at their baby shower, and at mine, they gave me a 15 dollar plastic baby bathtub. And yes, I was annoyed. Maybe not the nicest of reactions, but hey, I'm not perfect. Let's not be so quick to judge that OP is a wholly overprivileged value-less person because she vented anonymously to a bulletin board about a crappy gift. Its one of those things in life that are annoying and you can't say anything to family members...but DCUM gives you an outlet!

Here's the thing: it shouldn't be annoying at all. If it is, you really need to dig deep and figure out what's going on. I get the tackiest, cheapest, ugliest gifts ever from an aunt of mine, but she's got the biggest heart ever. I love those digbat gifts way more than if some shallow person spent a bunch on a gift, just to show off. Because on the other end of the spectrum, people who spend far too much are even more inappropriate, and are doing it to satisfy their fragile egos.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I was just annoyed and wanted to post annoymously - that's what great about message boards!

Please this is so ongoing. At one point, before she had kids and we had one, she was worked up about having to buy us 3 gifts for Christmas (me, my DH and our kid) b/c that was 3 gifts she had to buy for us and we only had to buy them 2. Seriously. And she is my DH's older sister...

.

[Anonymous]

I don't care about the gifts, send me a card and call it a day. Or at least call my DD on her birthday!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I was just annoyed and wanted to post annoymously - that's what great about message boards!

Please this is so ongoing. At one point, before she had kids and we had one, she was worked up about having to buy us 3 gifts for Christmas (me, my DH and our kid) b/c that was 3 gifts she had to buy for us and we only had to buy them 2. Seriously. And she is my DH's older sister...

.

So gifts aren't her thing--either adjust your presents accordingly or decide not to be annoyed by the inequality.

[Anonymous]

I agree it is not so much the gift as the whole attitude of OP's SIL.

They will not change, OP! We are surrounded by wealthier friends/family, so we spend time, not money to find one-of-a-kind items.

[Anonymous]

I agree with whoever said maybe you should adjust your giving habits to match hers, that way you won't get all revved up every time there is a gift-giving occasion. I personally think $40 is a bit high, and $12 is a bit low. If I were in your shoes, I'd probably want to continue giving nice gifts but not cheap out, so I'd probably start spending $25 or so per gift.

[Anonymous]

eww what a bunch of cheap people on this site! And i wonder if those are the same who post about their six figures + salaries! OP, I would be annoyed too. After all, she's family, from whom I would definitely expect a nicer gift than from friends. So 12 dollars simply means "I made no effort" attitude. btw, a friend gave DC a gift on the 1st bday and "forgot" to remove the price tag, which was 8 dollars. I simply don't feel like putting a thought on writing a thank you note, spending time finding out her address and money on the card and stamp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:eww what a bunch of cheap people on this site! And i wonder if those are the same who post about their six figures + salaries! OP, I would be annoyed too. After all, she's family, from whom I would definitely expect a nicer gift than from friends. So 12 dollars simply means "I made no effort" attitude. btw, a friend gave DC a gift on the 1st bday and "forgot" to remove the price tag, which was 8 dollars. I simply don't feel like putting a thought on writing a thank you note, spending time finding out her address and money on the card and stamp.

You're disgusting. You need to grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:eww what a bunch of cheap people on this site! And i wonder if those are the same who post about their six figures + salaries! OP, I would be annoyed too. After all, she's family, from whom I would definitely expect a nicer gift than from friends. So 12 dollars simply means "I made no effort" attitude. btw, a friend gave DC a gift on the 1st bday and "forgot" to remove the price tag, which was 8 dollars. I simply don't feel like putting a thought on writing a thank you note, spending time finding out her address and money on the card and stamp.

You're disgusting. You need to grow up.

and you're very mature, ms. name caller.

[Anonymous]

OP I hear you. I have spent countless hours on handmade gifts for my niece and nephew (SILs kids) because I love to do it and always want to give something awesome and thoughtful. But I've always been a little sad about it because I knew that when I had kids I would lose the free time to make this kind of stuff myself and she would never put that much thought into gifts for my kids (when I had them). And now that we've moved from our hometown to this tiny one bedroom apt in DC I really would rather have nothing than cheap plastic crappy toys for our 6 month DD!

But like other posters have mentioned this is NOT the only problem I have with my SIL!