Any 40-something widows actually find love again?

[Anonymous]

Never even met someone to love before. If love had been the requirement, I would have been alone forever.
That said, I think you can if you have loved before.

[Anonymous]

I was widowed in my 30s with young children. For a few years I was focused on my family, rebuilding a career, and had a fair amount of grief going on. I did meet someone fairly organically (at a children's birthday party of all things) and eventually we did start seeing each other a bit socially, taking it very slow. He was recently divorced with older kids. In my 40s now with an emptying nest and still have my "gentleman friend". Neither interested in marriage but we have a fun and respectful relationship which suits us both. .

Other widows I've known have been pretty focused on finding a man, being all-in on the man, getting married to the man and either stay with the man or break up with the man. Some have made peace with their solo status. YMMV.

[Anonymous]

Kudos to op for giving an honest and full description of her life.

[Anonymous]

My friend did. Her new partner had been divorced for a couple of years and had kids in college. She did find him on an app. He’s a great guy. Maybe not the most exciting person, but kind, sweet, loyal and wise. They are a great match.

[Anonymous]

I mean, black men tend not to stck around their own kids. I can't imagine them being keen on another man's kids.

[Anonymous]

Erika Kirk is 36, but appears to have quickly found a new man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Erika Kirk did.

Being newly widowed is really really weird. It’ll take months or years before she is thinking straight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Erika Kirk found love already? Of was she a widow when she met Charlie?

She is goo goo ga ga over John Donald Bowman aka JD Vance and can’t even bother to say the name of Usha when welcoming him.

She had her hands in his HAIR.

**

OP,

I agree with a PP and think you might find better men through your network. I’d put the word out there and see who might know someone.

Hugs to you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Widow here, 47 with 2 tweens. It’s been 2 years and I’m finally starting to think about dating again, but honestly not sure if that’s even realistic at this point.

I’ve got a good career, lots of friends, hobbies, no debt, about $1M net worth. I’m Black, size 8, pretty fit but could lose a few. I feel like I have my life together but I don’t know what dating even looks like for someone like me. My late husband was white but I’m open to all races. I tried bumble for a few weeks but no one seemed genuine.

Do men my age even date widows with kids still at home? Would love to know what’s realistic!

You're most likely looking at divorced men with kids. There are plenty of them in the DMV. I would try blind dates with friends of friends or colleagues before doing OLD.

OP, wouldn't you be happier not dating at all than dating a divorced man with kids? You sound like you are in a great place, and your kids are growing up fast. Could you wait until they leave the house and then restrict your dating pool to other empty nesters or men with no kids? You will have more peace, stability, and happiness if you just categorically avoid dating divorced men with kids at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's good you're open-minded, because if you're looking to date within your race, available black men are pretty hard to find. The only worse city in the US for this is Atlanta, where educated, eligible Black women outnumber similar Black men 10-to-1.

Open-mindu? Hongdae man?

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/sL1TS1Kpgv8

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Widow here. For me yes. Different than with my DH but still sweet and he makes me happy. Met him online and enjoy being with him. He’s kind to my children, especially my son.
I was ready OP, tired of being lonely and putting others first all the time. I also wanted to model a healthy dating life for my kids. And my kids wanted me to be happy too.
The first step is put yourself out there and keep an open mind. Have fun with it. Even bad dates make good stories for your friends to laugh with you about.

Did he have kids too? How old were your kids? Thanks for the hope!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Widow here, 47 with 2 tweens. It’s been 2 years and I’m finally starting to think about dating again, but honestly not sure if that’s even realistic at this point.

I’ve got a good career, lots of friends, hobbies, no debt, about $1M net worth. I’m Black, size 8, pretty fit but could lose a few. I feel like I have my life together but I don’t know what dating even looks like for someone like me. My late husband was white but I’m open to all races. I tried bumble for a few weeks but no one seemed genuine.

Do men my age even date widows with kids still at home? Would love to know what’s realistic!

When I was dating at that age, I would not date widows. I was worried about competing with a dead man. I am not saying this to be mean or cruel, just giving you real talk. Good luck. I am sure there are better men than me.

That is deeply weird. Any woman in her 40s is going to have baggage- and you'd rather it be from a failed relationship than a successful one?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Widow here. For me yes. Different than with my DH but still sweet and he makes me happy. Met him online and enjoy being with him. He’s kind to my children, especially my son.
I was ready OP, tired of being lonely and putting others first all the time. I also wanted to model a healthy dating life for my kids. And my kids wanted me to be happy too.
The first step is put yourself out there and keep an open mind. Have fun with it. Even bad dates make good stories for your friends to laugh with you about.

Did he have kids too? How old were your kids? Thanks for the hope!

He has a son age 20 now. He’s divorced. I have 3 kids 20-14.