Misstating age on OLD

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After we broke up, my ex told me he misrepresented his age by 10+ years on OLD sights. People can be such a-holes!

My exH was lying about his age his whole life. I discovered he was 20 years older than me after divorce (he corrected his age on DL somehow). He told me he was 10 years older when we met. Our child has autism - I knew older dads could be the cause for neurodivergence in babies . I wouldn’t have dated or married a 45 yo man when I was 25.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:After we broke up, my ex told me he misrepresented his age by 10+ years on OLD sights. People can be such a-holes!

My exH was lying about his age his whole life. I discovered he was 20 years older than me after divorce (he corrected his age on DL somehow). He told me he was 10 years older when we met. Our child has autism - I knew older dads could be the cause for neurodivergence in babies . I wouldn’t have dated or married a 45 yo man when I was 25.

[Anonymous]

No, don't lie. Men aren't confused over what 40yo or 50yo women look like. They have women friends, coworkers, family members, etc, and know exactly what women look like at various ages.

If their *only* source of information on what 40yo women look like is dating apps, that means they don't have a social life or interact with many women in real life, and that's not good.

Also, any decent man is going to immediately unmatch you once you've disclosed that you lied. If he's okay with you lying, it means he's okay with lying in general.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, don't lie. Men aren't confused over what 40yo or 50yo women look like. They have women friends, coworkers, family members, etc, and know exactly what women look like at various ages.

If their *only* source of information on what 40yo women look like is dating apps, that means they don't have a social life or interact with many women in real life, and that's not good.

Also, any decent man is going to immediately unmatch you once you've disclosed that you lied. If he's okay with you lying, it means he's okay with lying in general.

Actually, stating write at the top of your profile your actual age is not lying, and many dating coaches recommend doing it specifically to avoid filters

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, don't lie. Men aren't confused over what 40yo or 50yo women look like. They have women friends, coworkers, family members, etc, and know exactly what women look like at various ages.

If their *only* source of information on what 40yo women look like is dating apps, that means they don't have a social life or interact with many women in real life, and that's not good.

Also, any decent man is going to immediately unmatch you once you've disclosed that you lied. If he's okay with you lying, it means he's okay with lying in general.

Actually, stating write at the top of your profile your actual age is not lying, and many dating coaches recommend doing it specifically to avoid filters

I've seen men do that with both age and height, and I immediately swipe left/unmatch.

At worst, you're lying, at best, you're so desperate that you've resorted to dumb tricks. Unattractive either way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, don't lie. Men aren't confused over what 40yo or 50yo women look like. They have women friends, coworkers, family members, etc, and know exactly what women look like at various ages.

If their *only* source of information on what 40yo women look like is dating apps, that means they don't have a social life or interact with many women in real life, and that's not good.

Also, any decent man is going to immediately unmatch you once you've disclosed that you lied. If he's okay with you lying, it means he's okay with lying in general.

Actually, stating write at the top of your profile your actual age is not lying, and many dating coaches recommend doing it specifically to avoid filters

I've seen men do that with both age and height, and I immediately swipe left/unmatch.

At worst, you're lying, at best, you're so desperate that you've resorted to dumb tricks. Unattractive either way.

I don’t do it if he’s looking attractive to me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. The don’t want to meet men who don’t want to meet a woman my age. Easy filtering of men who won’t be intellectually compatible with me.

You are missing my point. They might have a wrong impression about how women your age look like, simply because they see all the lying profiles of other women. So let’s say you are 55, and they are looking at profiles of women who are actually 65 biological age. They think “oh, a 55 yo woman looks too old to me”.

So in fact the only way for you to meet men closer to your own age (by probability) would be also misstating your age.

You are completely mistaken. Do you honestly believe that guys get their views on how women appear at various ages from pictures on dating apps? Men exist in the real world. They encounter women in their families, among their friends, at their jobs, and all around them in everyday life. They understand what women look like.

[Anonymous]

On Plenty-of-Fish, they will not allow you to contact someone who is 14 years different from your age. So yes, I list a different age then state my correct age in my profile. I see a lot of people doing that. As for women on dating sites, my God, the photo filtering and edits have gotten way out of hand. It used to be just some women doing it a little. Now they ALL do it way too much. When I meet these women in person they are so far from their photos. I've never posted a filtered photo and I state the year of every photo I post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There seem to be a huge looks discrepancy between some women in their late 30s and 40s as well. I reviewed the female profiles of my “competition” similar to Amy Webb . Some 40s women look like they are late 50s. Some late 30s women look 45-49 yo to me. I wouldn’t have cared as I still look decent at 47. Some men also look waay older than me at age 47.

But the issue with that is - men look at these “40s” women and decide that all 40s women old and change their search filters. Then, even if a woman looks great she has no chances to appear in his search. Because 50% women and 30% men lie about their ages.

I spoke with my GFs who are also on OLD. They all were listing ages 5-10 years younger than their actual age. Like, a 53 yo friend was stating she was 45. She looks way older than me but would appear in search more than me.

Which is why men think women “hit the cliff” etc at certain age. My mother didn’t hit any cliffs and gracefully aged with excellent skin until about 70.

Do you reduce your age to avoid age filters? It seems to be the only way to go - play by the system rules. Then immediately disclose your real age when you match, reasons for that and they can unmatch after.

Your comment here totally disproves the story we usually see on this forum about men wanting older women.
If your 53-year-old friend shows up in more searches when she says she's 45, it's simply because most men aren't into older women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:On Plenty-of-Fish, they will not allow you to contact someone who is 14 years different from your age. So yes, I list a different age then state my correct age in my profile. I see a lot of people doing that. As for women on dating sites, my God, the photo filtering and edits have gotten way out of hand. It used to be just some women doing it a little. Now they ALL do it way too much. When I meet these women in person they are so far from their photos. I've never posted a filtered photo and I state the year of every photo I post.

Seeking women 15+ younger is overboard - any reason 14 years younger aren’t f..ble for you or not young enough? I’m OP and I wonder if I should put 44-45 instead of 47. Just because SO many men and women misstate ages! I don’t want not to appear in suggested profiles if other women who are in reality 5+ years older than me get more popular placement based on their age settings alone.

I was told by the men I met in RL that I look exactly like my photos (I don’t use filters). Almost everyone wants a second date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. The don’t want to meet men who don’t want to meet a woman my age. Easy filtering of men who won’t be intellectually compatible with me.

You are missing my point. They might have a wrong impression about how women your age look like, simply because they see all the lying profiles of other women. So let’s say you are 55, and they are looking at profiles of women who are actually 65 biological age. They think “oh, a 55 yo woman looks too old to me”.

So in fact the only way for you to meet men closer to your own age (by probability) would be also misstating your age.

What will happen when you meet them and they discover that you lied about your age?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There seem to be a huge looks discrepancy between some women in their late 30s and 40s as well. I reviewed the female profiles of my “competition” similar to Amy Webb . Some 40s women look like they are late 50s. Some late 30s women look 45-49 yo to me. I wouldn’t have cared as I still look decent at 47. Some men also look waay older than me at age 47.

But the issue with that is - men look at these “40s” women and decide that all 40s women old and change their search filters. Then, even if a woman looks great she has no chances to appear in his search. Because 50% women and 30% men lie about their ages.

I spoke with my GFs who are also on OLD. They all were listing ages 5-10 years younger than their actual age. Like, a 53 yo friend was stating she was 45. She looks way older than me but would appear in search more than me.

Which is why men think women “hit the cliff” etc at certain age. My mother didn’t hit any cliffs and gracefully aged with excellent skin until about 70.

Do you reduce your age to avoid age filters? It seems to be the only way to go - play by the system rules. Then immediately disclose your real age when you match, reasons for that and they can unmatch after.

Your comment here totally disproves the story we usually see on this forum about men wanting older women.
If your 53-year-old friend shows up in more searches when she says she's 45, it's simply because most men aren't into older women.

Just like most women aren’t into older men either. Most men and women end up dating and marrying someone closer to their age: the gap at marriage is 2-3 years statistically

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. The don’t want to meet men who don’t want to meet a woman my age. Easy filtering of men who won’t be intellectually compatible with me.

You are missing my point. They might have a wrong impression about how women your age look like, simply because they see all the lying profiles of other women. So let’s say you are 55, and they are looking at profiles of women who are actually 65 biological age. They think “oh, a 55 yo woman looks too old to me”.

So in fact the only way for you to meet men closer to your own age (by probability) would be also misstating your age.

What will happen when you meet them and they discover that you lied about your age?

I don’t hide real age until we meet. Hinge has a “private message to match” option before they can contact you. I would state my real age there (3 years older) , they can un match instead of contacting me. And in my experience I was getting more matches that way as I do have great photos and look the same in real life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. The don’t want to meet men who don’t want to meet a woman my age. Easy filtering of men who won’t be intellectually compatible with me.

You are missing my point. They might have a wrong impression about how women your age look like, simply because they see all the lying profiles of other women. So let’s say you are 55, and they are looking at profiles of women who are actually 65 biological age. They think “oh, a 55 yo woman looks too old to me”.

So in fact the only way for you to meet men closer to your own age (by probability) would be also misstating your age.

What will happen when you meet them and they discover that you lied about your age?

She'll be okay if she connects with another liar.
Maybe she'll update her profile to say she's looking for a guy who doesn't see lying as a dealbreaker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. The don’t want to meet men who don’t want to meet a woman my age. Easy filtering of men who won’t be intellectually compatible with me.

You are missing my point. They might have a wrong impression about how women your age look like, simply because they see all the lying profiles of other women. So let’s say you are 55, and they are looking at profiles of women who are actually 65 biological age. They think “oh, a 55 yo woman looks too old to me”.

So in fact the only way for you to meet men closer to your own age (by probability) would be also misstating your age.

What will happen when you meet them and they discover that you lied about your age?

She'll be okay if she connects with another liar.
Maybe she'll update her profile to say she's looking for a guy who doesn't see lying as a dealbreaker.

How come disclosing age before exchanging messages is “lying”? The only thing OP gets is to overcome the filters abused by other users