Older "Cool girl" women at work

[Anonymous]

Pick someone and mirror them.

[Anonymous]

A word about "normal" clothes: sometimes it takes a great eye for color, texture and proportions, to put together a casual outfit!

I dress much better now in my 40s than I did in previous decades, because I have finally understood what works with my figure. Took me a while... I agree with PP that it's about finding cuts of clothes that hit just right for where your curves hit, ie visual transition points. And then going with a color palette that pleases the eye.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 61 and about 5 years ago I upped my skin care routine. It really had been just a gentle cleanser and moisturizer/SPF. I did a lot of research and now have a multi step routine. My skin looks so much better which makes me feel better and more confident (I wish I had started it earlier).

j

Where did you look to figure out what would be good for your skin care routine? I think I need to up my game.

OP, good shoes help. Wearing things properly. Things that you’re comfortable in, even if they are tailored or form-fitting. A cohesive style and wardrobe. No trend-chasing. Carrying yourself with confidence. No hunching, walk upright, no self-deprecating or apologetic air.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
A word about "normal" clothes: sometimes it takes a great eye for color, texture and proportions, to put together a casual outfit!

I dress much better now in my 40s than I did in previous decades, because I have finally understood what works with my figure. Took me a while... I agree with PP that it's about finding cuts of clothes that hit just right for where your curves hit, ie visual transition points. And then going with a color palette that pleases the eye.

Visual transition points make so much sense. Thanks to PPs for articulating this. And this is where I now realize I struggle. I have an extremely short torso for my 5’ 10” height. The natural waist/ curve on tops/ dresses/blazers all hit where my hips start to widen, not at my actual waist. And I look bigger than my size 4/ 130lb suggests. If I try to tailor to where my waist is, my legs look disproportionately and unnaturally long. Open to suggestions on how to dress for my body type

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have worked with women like this and one of the things I've noticed is that they tend to have distinctive and consistent personal style. Like there was a partner at my old law firm who wore her hair in in shoulder-length blunt cut with a center part, and always wore glasses with a dark red or maroon frame (she had a few different pairs, but they were always those colors -- very dark so it almost read as brown but enough color to be distinctive). The rest of her clothes were always high quality neutrals, usually in black, navy, or dark brown. She always had really high quality shoes, I coveted her shoe collection. But her clothes were never recognizable labels or even really distinctive pieces, just clearly high quality suiting separates, ribbed tees, cashmere sweaters, etc. She had one big diamond ring and the rest of her jewelry was subtle, and her makeup was tasteful and understated.

The effect was that you could spot her a mile away, she always looked pretty much the same, but very pulled together and professional. The haircut and glasses combo was kind of iconic, like if she wrote for the New Yorker, you know exactly what her little sketch portrait on her byline would look like.

And I think that was the key. She wasn't all over the place trying to follow trends. She'd found a couple things that worked for her and committed to them, and did the highest end, most polished version of them. She never experimented in the time I knew her, as far as I know she'd been dressing that way since law school.

I think it takes confidence and really knowing yourself to make that work, but it's very impactful.

I agree. It isn’t about stress. It’s about having a distinctive style and confidence. Also, the style has to fit the age group so you don’t look like you’re trying too hard to look young.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
A word about "normal" clothes: sometimes it takes a great eye for color, texture and proportions, to put together a casual outfit!

I dress much better now in my 40s than I did in previous decades, because I have finally understood what works with my figure. Took me a while... I agree with PP that it's about finding cuts of clothes that hit just right for where your curves hit, ie visual transition points. And then going with a color palette that pleases the eye.

I would add that for most people (other than some rare exceptions) the trendy colors won’t always work for you and can make you look old, sick or tired. Doing the color draping thing that is popular in Asia is actually really helpful. Then you can find a palette of colors that both work and go together and make those colors the basis of most of your work clothing.

[Anonymous]

I think I’m one of these women, and I work in fintech surrounded by them, so I’ll share a few ways I got here—

First, I owned the fact that leveling up my look was part of my job once I got to the exec level. So I used to like really chase sales or put off Botox and although YMMV, once I just embraced that this is part of the deal in the dumb world we live in, I sort of relaxed into it and just added looking “executive” or “powerful” or “totally competent” is part of the JD.

My secret is that I wear the same proportions and five or so colors everyday. I’m tall, so a high rise pant that shows my waist is good. I have about nine pairs. Jeans, trousers, actually a lot of “soft” pants from Cos that look chic. Then I pair it with a body suit or a high quality tee. Then I add a jacket. Go-to jackets include a white blazer w gold buttons from Veronica beard, a cropped camel wool number from sezane, or an oversized plaid blazer from Zara.

Shoes are often either a Gucci loafer (if you know you can tell, but there’s no logo on it), or a white platform sneaker, or a brown bootie from Dior (also no labels)

Then medium gold hoops, one or two chains, and friendship braclets from my daughters. I also ADORE a silk scarf and it’s a chic and underrated accessory. I have a handful of twillys from Hermes but also love a few of the impulse purchases for like $15 I’ve made on Amazon.

I’ll also throw on a bottega tote (no label) for the days I need to look really tight, but honestly normally running around w a company logo backpack from a retreat.

I just got back from a trip where I was surrounded by the millionaire girlies and the most killer accessory everyone had was sleeveless, high cut tops with absolutely ripped arms. So that would be fun to figure out how to get.

My monthly/yearly spread on my body feels insane right now for me but I do think it’s common….? Botox every four months, then once a year I do lasers or micro needling. I’m also probably spending $260 a week on a personal trainer and my yoga practice.

For context, I make about $800k a year, I’m one person removed from CEO at a 15,000 person company.

My energy is very bright and positive and confident at work. For better or worse, I believe at this level vibes are v important.

[Anonymous]

Some people are cool; others are not. I'm one of the others.

Is it really possible to become one of the some?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have worked with women like this and one of the things I've noticed is that they tend to have distinctive and consistent personal style. Like there was a partner at my old law firm who wore her hair in in shoulder-length blunt cut with a center part, and always wore glasses with a dark red or maroon frame (she had a few different pairs, but they were always those colors -- very dark so it almost read as brown but enough color to be distinctive). The rest of her clothes were always high quality neutrals, usually in black, navy, or dark brown. She always had really high quality shoes, I coveted her shoe collection. But her clothes were never recognizable labels or even really distinctive pieces, just clearly high quality suiting separates, ribbed tees, cashmere sweaters, etc. She had one big diamond ring and the rest of her jewelry was subtle, and her makeup was tasteful and understated.

The effect was that you could spot her a mile away, she always looked pretty much the same, but very pulled together and professional. The haircut and glasses combo was kind of iconic, like if she wrote for the New Yorker, you know exactly what her little sketch portrait on her byline would look like.

And I think that was the key. She wasn't all over the place trying to follow trends. She'd found a couple things that worked for her and committed to them, and did the highest end, most polished version of them. She never experimented in the time I knew her, as far as I know she'd been dressing that way since law school.

I think it takes confidence and really knowing yourself to make that work, but it's very impactful.

Are you just describing yourself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think I’m one of these women, and I work in fintech surrounded by them, so I’ll share a few ways I got here—

First, I owned the fact that leveling up my look was part of my job once I got to the exec level. So I used to like really chase sales or put off Botox and although YMMV, once I just embraced that this is part of the deal in the dumb world we live in, I sort of relaxed into it and just added looking “executive” or “powerful” or “totally competent” is part of the JD.

My secret is that I wear the same proportions and five or so colors everyday. I’m tall, so a high rise pant that shows my waist is good. I have about nine pairs. Jeans, trousers, actually a lot of “soft” pants from Cos that look chic. Then I pair it with a body suit or a high quality tee. Then I add a jacket. Go-to jackets include a white blazer w gold buttons from Veronica beard, a cropped camel wool number from sezane, or an oversized plaid blazer from Zara.

Shoes are often either a Gucci loafer (if you know you can tell, but there’s no logo on it), or a white platform sneaker, or a brown bootie from Dior (also no labels)

Then medium gold hoops, one or two chains, and friendship braclets from my daughters. I also ADORE a silk scarf and it’s a chic and underrated accessory. I have a handful of twillys from Hermes but also love a few of the impulse purchases for like $15 I’ve made on Amazon.

I’ll also throw on a bottega tote (no label) for the days I need to look really tight, but honestly normally running around w a company logo backpack from a retreat.

I just got back from a trip where I was surrounded by the millionaire girlies and the most killer accessory everyone had was sleeveless, high cut tops with absolutely ripped arms. So that would be fun to figure out how to get.

My monthly/yearly spread on my body feels insane right now for me but I do think it’s common….? Botox every four months, then once a year I do lasers or micro needling. I’m also probably spending $260 a week on a personal trainer and my yoga practice.

For context, I make about $800k a year, I’m one person removed from CEO at a 15,000 person company.

My energy is very bright and positive and confident at work. For better or worse, I believe at this level vibes are v important.

PP how old are you / how old are your kids? I’m early 30s also in fintech and dress like this but you can just see the exhaustion on my face regardless of the Botox yoga etc

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good bone structure and natural beauty (clear skin, even features) really help as you age.

I agree. Great eyes and white teeth/great smile age beautifully for women.
Mi also agree with the poster who said that beautiful people rock their own look. There’s so much beauty in being comfortable in one’s own own skin. Took me a while but I’ve gotten there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think I’m one of these women, and I work in fintech surrounded by them, so I’ll share a few ways I got here—

First, I owned the fact that leveling up my look was part of my job once I got to the exec level. So I used to like really chase sales or put off Botox and although YMMV, once I just embraced that this is part of the deal in the dumb world we live in, I sort of relaxed into it and just added looking “executive” or “powerful” or “totally competent” is part of the JD.

My secret is that I wear the same proportions and five or so colors everyday. I’m tall, so a high rise pant that shows my waist is good. I have about nine pairs. Jeans, trousers, actually a lot of “soft” pants from Cos that look chic. Then I pair it with a body suit or a high quality tee. Then I add a jacket. Go-to jackets include a white blazer w gold buttons from Veronica beard, a cropped camel wool number from sezane, or an oversized plaid blazer from Zara.

Shoes are often either a Gucci loafer (if you know you can tell, but there’s no logo on it), or a white platform sneaker, or a brown bootie from Dior (also no labels)

Then medium gold hoops, one or two chains, and friendship braclets from my daughters. I also ADORE a silk scarf and it’s a chic and underrated accessory. I have a handful of twillys from Hermes but also love a few of the impulse purchases for like $15 I’ve made on Amazon.

I’ll also throw on a bottega tote (no label) for the days I need to look really tight, but honestly normally running around w a company logo backpack from a retreat.

I just got back from a trip where I was surrounded by the millionaire girlies and the most killer accessory everyone had was sleeveless, high cut tops with absolutely ripped arms. So that would be fun to figure out how to get.

My monthly/yearly spread on my body feels insane right now for me but I do think it’s common….? Botox every four months, then once a year I do lasers or micro needling. I’m also probably spending $260 a week on a personal trainer and my yoga practice.

For context, I make about $800k a year, I’m one person removed from CEO at a 15,000 person company.

My energy is very bright and positive and confident at work. For better or worse, I believe at this level vibes are v important.

Where do you be the body suits from? I keep looking for one with a high neckline and they all have thongs, which I don’t want.

[Anonymous]

The most put together people I know have found their style and they largely ignore trends. They invest in quality materials and know what silhouette suits their figure. They primarily wear neutrals but have a few signature colors. They’ve spent years amassing their perfect closet. If they color their hair, it’s subtle and enhancing rather than a big seasonal color swap, and their haircut/style is consistent. Makeup is very intentional, they spend time finding the correct shades and textures.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
A word about "normal" clothes: sometimes it takes a great eye for color, texture and proportions, to put together a casual outfit!

I dress much better now in my 40s than I did in previous decades, because I have finally understood what works with my figure. Took me a while... I agree with PP that it's about finding cuts of clothes that hit just right for where your curves hit, ie visual transition points. And then going with a color palette that pleases the eye.

Visual transition points make so much sense. Thanks to PPs for articulating this. And this is where I now realize I struggle. I have an extremely short torso for my 5’ 10” height. The natural waist/ curve on tops/ dresses/blazers all hit where my hips start to widen, not at my actual waist. And I look bigger than my size 4/ 130lb suggests. If I try to tailor to where my waist is, my legs look disproportionately and unnaturally long. Open to suggestions on how to dress for my body type

Belts that match your top half might help. I have a similar issue and I find that I like things that visually shorten my lower half, such as t-strap shoes or cuffs on pants.

[Anonymous]

I think you really have to know what looks good on yourself proportionally too.

I’m built like Jessica rabbit and while I’d like to look slim and sleek like you described your person at work, it’s not going to happen for me.
I wear sweater dresses that cover the girls and accentuate my legs. If I define my waist I look too sexy.
I have a large square face that looks better a big soft curls framing it. A cut as you described. Would make me look like a linebacker.