Expectations for 3rd grader

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:By 3rd grade the kid should be setting their own alarm, getting up/getting ready, packing their backpack, etc... Making breakfast and packing the lunch box should def be your responsibility - maybe involve the kid in what food they will be getting the next day. You should make sure your kid sets alarm properly and does what they need to do, but after a few weeks there is almost no need. My 2nd grader did all this this and my preschooler can get up, brush teeth and get dressed for the day (most of the time, no alarm yet either). So it really depends on your kid too.

Mine sets his own alarm (just started in 3rd grade), gets dressed, packs backpack. Combing his own hair is a little iffy still. He actually likes doing the above things, because they give him some independence and responsibility.

I do think at this age they can pack their own lunch sometimes. Not every day, but maybe once a week or every 2 weeks, and you check it over. DS8 packed today while I made a more elaborate breakfast. He packed a jam sandwich, grapes, a couple of small cookies, milk. I suggested he add a beef stick for a bit more protein. We really need to buy more lunch friendly vegetables this week, and ok, he totally took advantage of being the lunch packer by choosing chocolate milk instead of regular, but I think he did fine!

[Anonymous]

The one thing your 3rd grader should be doing is packing their own backpack. Beyond that it depends on your preferences and your kid(s). For example, my 4th grader is an early riser who eats essentially the same lunch every day. He packs his own lunch. I will help with slicing an apple if he’s running late. 6th grader is perpetually running late. I’m trying to have her take more responsibility for her own lunch this year, but I’ll also give her a hand. My job is mostly making sure we have lunch supplies.

[Anonymous]

DS reports his lunch table mate this year packs her own lunch every day. Sunbutter sandwich, fruit, and a dessert.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She should pack her own bag the night before and make lunch as much as possible the night before. Then sgg go e can finish packing lunch in the AM.

Do not make your 3rd grader pack her own lunch. Children should be taken care of and parented. I don’t know who sold parents on the idea that kids need to be independent from infancy on.

[Anonymous]

My 4th grader is responsible for packing her own bag before bed and adding her lunch and water bottle in the morning (with reminders, of course). She is starting to get her own breakfast, but that's just her being independent and not something I've pushed her to do.

[Anonymous]

I definitely still packed my kids’s lunches back then, but they’re perfectly capable of doing it now in HS, they can cook and do their own laundry and are very independent. There’s a lot of what should your kid do, but think of it in the context of your household. Families with pets may have kids with different chores than others. For me, cleaning up after yourself is a more important habit to develop than making your own lunches. So at that age my big push was making sure that when they came home from school they put their empty lunchbox containers in the dishwasher and hung up their lunchboxes on the hooks we have, shoes in the bench, backpacks away. I wanted them to be responsible for remembering their own things out of the house so they had their own bags to bring to the pool from a very young age, they had to carry their own towels, goggles, snacks. They lost goggles a few times but then they got into the habits of putting them back in place.

All that to say—there’s no list of what every kid should do at every age, but think of it as what you think is important for your family at the time and make sure they do have some chores and expectations, but the ones they have should work for you. If you like making lunches and want to make sure it’s well balanced and healthy, then keep going.