Second baby at 48

[Anonymous]

My mom had my two youngest siblings at ages 43 and 47. It was fine. Healthy babies, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom had my two youngest siblings at ages 43 and 47. It was fine. Healthy babies, etc.

I’m sure your family was fine.

I have also witnessed older parents with kids with severe special needs and they do not look fine at all.

I’m 47. I have witnessed a few surprise babies. It was more like 45 and the family does seem happy.

Good luck. OP.

[Anonymous]

Plus your age and your husband...a lot could be genetically wrong with that baby. NYT just did an article about the risks of old sperm and declining sperm rates in men.

[Anonymous]

People are being pretty unkind here.
All things are possible if you want them enough. Yes you will be tired but you can make it work if you want to.
I do think the odds are high of a miscarriage —I would mentally prepare for that. My family has lots of pregnancies in 40s, mostly unplanned. But nothing nearly as late as 48. There’s a huge difference between 43 and 48. (Question if you have ultra longevity in your family? The gene for ultralongevity — eg over 100–is associated with the gene for late pregnancies, which totally makes sense. Anyway if your grandparents lived over 100, that increases the odds you’ll be able to carry.)

[Anonymous]

This is probably a situation in which you practice radical acceptance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The odds are below 1%? Heck, at 35 I could no longer carry to term. My body killed literally every baby we made.

Don’t be a nasty cow. When I gave birth at GW at 39, I could see the first names and ages of all the admitted mothers written on the nursing station board. There were plenty in their 40s-all with babies. You’ll find plenty of “geriatric moms” in the DC area.

DP, but no, you're very ignorant. First, practically all 45+ mothers with successful pregnancies are all not only IVF, but also DONOR EGG. A woman of OP's age seldom has any healthy eggs left. Second, in the realm of natural pregnancies, you probably do not understand that the chance of live birth decreases DRASTICALLY every year of your 40s. 43, you may still have a chance, and it happened to OP. 45, a natural pregnancy is very rare. 48, chances are close to nil.

So OP, whether she likes it or not, is on her way to a miscarriage. I wish her the best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People are being pretty unkind here.
All things are possible if you want them enough. Yes you will be tired but you can make it work if you want to.
I do think the odds are high of a miscarriage —I would mentally prepare for that. My family has lots of pregnancies in 40s, mostly unplanned. But nothing nearly as late as 48. There’s a huge difference between 43 and 48. (Question if you have ultra longevity in your family? The gene for ultralongevity — eg over 100–is associated with the gene for late pregnancies, which totally makes sense. Anyway if your grandparents lived over 100, that increases the odds you’ll be able to carry.)

I don't see anyone being unkind to OP. Some people are making very optimistic assumptions about the viability of the pregnancy, however. And that's not being unkind, it's stating a fact OP needs to psychologically prepare for.

[Anonymous]

The odds folks are citing here change quite a bit when you have already had a healthy birth when you were 43. I am not sure they go past the 50% mark, but they do go WAY up.

So let’s not be speaking miscarriage into this situation just yet.

[Anonymous]

My friend had her first at 47 and is about to have her second at 50. If you're up to it, go for it.

[Anonymous]

Just get genetic testing done. Then you'll largely know if there are any issues. No need to speculate or let people here freak you out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I got a very late start to marriage and family. Married at 41 first baby at 43. DD was a surprise as we weren't exactly planning her but we have been happy . It now seems we may have a second on the way. Still need to confirm and I realize at my age it's likely that I won't go to term.
But if I do...I guess I need some reassurance with the possibility of having a 6 year old and a newborn at nearly 50 and DH at over 50.

You will be close to 70 when kid is 20.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got a very late start to marriage and family. Married at 41 first baby at 43. DD was a surprise as we weren't exactly planning her but we have been happy . It now seems we may have a second on the way. Still need to confirm and I realize at my age it's likely that I won't go to term.
But if I do...I guess I need some reassurance with the possibility of having a 6 year old and a newborn at nearly 50 and DH at over 50.

You will be close to 70 when kid is 20.

We got a real math whiz over here!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend had her first at 47 and is about to have her second at 50. If you're up to it, go for it. [e/quote]

Ummm what?

[Anonymous]

My grandma had 13 kids, the last one when she was 48. My mom was 42 when she had me. I had my two kids (naturally, no IVF) at 41 and 43. Everybody turned out better than fine. I’m 63 with two kids in college. Congrats OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My friend had her first at 47 and is about to have her second at 50. If you're up to it, go for it. [e/quote]

Ummm what?

With reproductive assistance, lots of women are having babies in their 50s and even in their 60s. I'm not saying it's easy, but it has been done thousands of times (usually with donor eggs). It would be incredibly rare for a woman to have an unassisted conception and live birth at that age, but there are records of it happening. Understandably, nobody has access to a woman's fertility records so it's difficult to prove or disprove reproductive assistance.