My gf screens all emails from my ex (divorced)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like you are my ex. I’ve never sent inappropriate messages, though.
We always got along. His gf won’t let him read messages or talk on phone with me or his own children. Or see any of us.
It’s spelled the end of his relationship with his kids, but I guess that’s her aim.

This sounds like a totally different situation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t want to completely block my ex because we share grown children, but so many of her missives are boundary-crossing or just nasty and unnecessary and unhelpful. So now for months everything goes to a new email address that I don’t access, and my gf reads them before sharing them with me if there is something important or helpful. I provide responses when needed.

It’s a big relief, and also reassures my gf that I’m not carrying on with my ex behind her back, but I feel a little guilty about this arrangement.

Is there a better way to handle this?

If she was only your ex then may be but you share children with her so be a grown up and handle it yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:GF isn't exactly a neutral party.

This^.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So your girlfriend’s your secretary?

No. Parole officer.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand why anyone past 50 with grown children would call their partner a girlfriend. She isn't a girl nor just a friend. She is your partner or significant other.

[Anonymous]

It's kind of wild that your gf screens email from your ex. I wouldn't be comfortable with that situation at all. Is your girlfriend controlling and/or jealous?

[Anonymous]

Another manbaby who needs women to do everything for him.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like a win-win~!

[Anonymous]

Should like you have an issue selecting partners.

[Anonymous]

As others have said, what are you communicating about? My parents got divorced when I was in my 20s and really never needed to communicate other than for the divorce. They probably haven’t spoken for at least a decade at this point.

[Anonymous]

Weird, I have zero interest in nasty emails from my husband's ex. He deals with it as a grown up.

[Anonymous]

Great this works for you.

However, why does your girlfriend need to be a part of any communication between you and your ex wife?

Are you and your ex wife not able to communicate as two civil adults?

Especially now that your kids are adults? Why are the two of you even communicating??

Shame on all three of you.

You sir for not being able to establish boundaries with your ex wife

Your ex wife for crossing boundaries and
Your girlfriend for getting into the middle of your baggage -- EWWW

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Great this works for you.

However, why does your girlfriend need to be a part of any communication between you and your ex wife?

Are you and your ex wife not able to communicate as two civil adults?

Especially now that your kids are adults? Why are the two of you even communicating??

Shame on all three of you.

You sir for not being able to establish boundaries with your ex wife

Your ex wife for crossing boundaries and
Your girlfriend for getting into the middle of your baggage -- EWWW

OP here. Thanks for all the helpful responses, especially the affirmations.

To this PP, how do you know I’m a “sir”? I never identified myself as a man.

As to establishing boundaries, it’s a pretty pretty hard when your ex is an sometimes-dry-drunk alcoholic-BPD-rageaholic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Great this works for you.

However, why does your girlfriend need to be a part of any communication between you and your ex wife?

Are you and your ex wife not able to communicate as two civil adults?

Especially now that your kids are adults? Why are the two of you even communicating??

Shame on all three of you.

You sir for not being able to establish boundaries with your ex wife

Your ex wife for crossing boundaries and
Your girlfriend for getting into the middle of your baggage -- EWWW

OP here. Thanks for all the helpful responses, especially the affirmations.

To this PP, how do you know I’m a “sir”? I never identified myself as a man.

As to establishing boundaries, it’s a pretty pretty hard when your ex is an sometimes-dry-drunk alcoholic-BPD-rageaholic.

Yeah, but your current gf is controlling and jealous/insecure/doesn't trust you. You have poor boundaries. Work on yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Great this works for you.

However, why does your girlfriend need to be a part of any communication between you and your ex wife?

Are you and your ex wife not able to communicate as two civil adults?

Especially now that your kids are adults? Why are the two of you even communicating??

Shame on all three of you.

You sir for not being able to establish boundaries with your ex wife

Your ex wife for crossing boundaries and
Your girlfriend for getting into the middle of your baggage -- EWWW

OP here. Thanks for all the helpful responses, especially the affirmations.

To this PP, how do you know I’m a “sir”? I never identified myself as a man.

As to establishing boundaries, it’s a pretty pretty hard when your ex is a sometimes-dry-drunk alcoholic-BPD-rageaholic.

Sir/Ma’am - do better.