How do I get brother-in-law to be more modest around the house?

[Anonymous]

Your daughters are more than old enough to know the proper names for human anatomy.

You are more than old enough to be able to simply say, “Hey Brad, would you please wear shorts or pants or pajama pants? I’m not comfortable with just underwear. Thanks.”

If you can’t manage that, you aren’t mature enough to have guests in your home.

[Anonymous]

You are making a way bigger deal out of this than needs to be both about the underpants and talking to your kids about anatomy.
It seems you have deep seated issues with the male body that need exploring in therapy. you're projecting your issues onto your kids

1. his sister says "bro put some pants on. we dress around the kids or something like that.

2/ you pick up one of the many preschool books about bodies and read it with the kids though if they have gone to daycare they've probably see it al and don't care.

[Anonymous]

Tell him to go out some damn clothes on and that he should know better. Discussing anatomy and what not is to be done on your, and your wife's, timeline not some lazy ass who can't bother to at least put pants on. Normalize shaming when it's warranted ffs

[Anonymous]

The problem is YOU.

Do you realize that in mother-father households, and particularly those with both sons and daughters, the human body is usually not taboo? My daughter saw her older brother naked from the day she was born. Nudity is not a problem.

Personally I wouldn't have a problem with a guest's tight underpants adjacent to morning coffee, although this is not how I raise my own son, but YOU as the homeowner have the right to request of guests that they dress with propriety. So go ahead and do that.

But from there to insinuating that your girls will be traumatized if they see anatomy they do not themselves possess is beyond crazy! Do your job as a parent and buy a kids' book about bodies and go from there, you silly goose.

My goodness.

[Anonymous]

Supply a robe in his sized monogrammed with the family crest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd be pissed. I don't want to see the outline of some guy's baguette while I'm just trying to drink my coffeee

This. Just have your wife tell him underwear without more are not enough. NBD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your daughters are more than old enough to know the proper names for human anatomy.

You are more than old enough to be able to simply say, “Hey Brad, would you please wear shorts or pants or pajama pants? I’m not comfortable with just underwear. Thanks.”

If you can’t manage that, you aren’t mature enough to have guests in your home.

All of this—sheesh OP grow up and act like an adult. If my BIL wandered into the kitchen in his underwear, I’d say “whoa Larlo pants please, no one wants to see your underwear” instead of fretting in the pantry over what to do.

[Anonymous]

How on earth do people like OP get through the day. And yet here they are, in charge of raising small children. YIKES.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The problem is YOU.

Do you realize that in mother-father households, and particularly those with both sons and daughters, the human body is usually not taboo? My daughter saw her older brother naked from the day she was born. Nudity is not a problem.

Personally I wouldn't have a problem with a guest's tight underpants adjacent to morning coffee, although this is not how I raise my own son, but YOU as the homeowner have the right to request of guests that they dress with propriety. So go ahead and do that.

But from there to insinuating that your girls will be traumatized if they see anatomy they do not themselves possess is beyond crazy! Do your job as a parent and buy a kids' book about bodies and go from there, you silly goose.

My goodness.

You can blahblahblah all you want about how you’ve decided everyone in your household is free to run around nude. HOWEVER please keep in mind that just because it’s ok with you, does NOT mean your whole family is ok with it. My husband’s aunt and uncle were like you until their 15 year old daughter had a screaming meltdown during an extended family thanksgiving about how her dad and brother run around naked and in underwear and she is not allowed to say anything because their family is so free and enlightened despite the fact that all of these free swinging hot dogs have made her skin crawl since she was 7.

THAT was a fun holiday!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is YOU.

Do you realize that in mother-father households, and particularly those with both sons and daughters, the human body is usually not taboo? My daughter saw her older brother naked from the day she was born. Nudity is not a problem.

Personally I wouldn't have a problem with a guest's tight underpants adjacent to morning coffee, although this is not how I raise my own son, but YOU as the homeowner have the right to request of guests that they dress with propriety. So go ahead and do that.

But from there to insinuating that your girls will be traumatized if they see anatomy they do not themselves possess is beyond crazy! Do your job as a parent and buy a kids' book about bodies and go from there, you silly goose.

My goodness.

You can blahblahblah all you want about how you’ve decided everyone in your household is free to run around nude. HOWEVER please keep in mind that just because it’s ok with you, does NOT mean your whole family is ok with it. My husband’s aunt and uncle were like you until their 15 year old daughter had a screaming meltdown during an extended family thanksgiving about how her dad and brother run around naked and in underwear and she is not allowed to say anything because their family is so free and enlightened despite the fact that all of these free swinging hot dogs have made her skin crawl since she was 7.

THAT was a fun holiday!

PP you replied to - and that's why I said that as the homeowner, you get to make the rules in your house. But this insane rant and the one in your OP show that you're not thinking straight. Consider that living with a parent that's perpetually on edge at all times over small matters is more likely to damage your children than anything else. If that's the way you live your life, OP, you need therapy and medication.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is YOU.

Do you realize that in mother-father households, and particularly those with both sons and daughters, the human body is usually not taboo? My daughter saw her older brother naked from the day she was born. Nudity is not a problem.

Personally I wouldn't have a problem with a guest's tight underpants adjacent to morning coffee, although this is not how I raise my own son, but YOU as the homeowner have the right to request of guests that they dress with propriety. So go ahead and do that.

But from there to insinuating that your girls will be traumatized if they see anatomy they do not themselves possess is beyond crazy! Do your job as a parent and buy a kids' book about bodies and go from there, you silly goose.

My goodness.

You can blahblahblah all you want about how you’ve decided everyone in your household is free to run around nude. HOWEVER please keep in mind that just because it’s ok with you, does NOT mean your whole family is ok with it. My husband’s aunt and uncle were like you until their 15 year old daughter had a screaming meltdown during an extended family thanksgiving about how her dad and brother run around naked and in underwear and she is not allowed to say anything because their family is so free and enlightened despite the fact that all of these free swinging hot dogs have made her skin crawl since she was 7.

THAT was a fun holiday!

So... is this why you're a lesbian? You have a pathological fear of the male member?

Because no one in their right mind is using those words. You seem to be mentally unwell. I'm sorry, but please get help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is YOU.

Do you realize that in mother-father households, and particularly those with both sons and daughters, the human body is usually not taboo? My daughter saw her older brother naked from the day she was born. Nudity is not a problem.

Personally I wouldn't have a problem with a guest's tight underpants adjacent to morning coffee, although this is not how I raise my own son, but YOU as the homeowner have the right to request of guests that they dress with propriety. So go ahead and do that.

But from there to insinuating that your girls will be traumatized if they see anatomy they do not themselves possess is beyond crazy! Do your job as a parent and buy a kids' book about bodies and go from there, you silly goose.

My goodness.

You can blahblahblah all you want about how you’ve decided everyone in your household is free to run around nude. HOWEVER please keep in mind that just because it’s ok with you, does NOT mean your whole family is ok with it. My husband’s aunt and uncle were like you until their 15 year old daughter had a screaming meltdown during an extended family thanksgiving about how her dad and brother run around naked and in underwear and she is not allowed to say anything because their family is so free and enlightened despite the fact that all of these free swinging hot dogs have made her skin crawl since she was 7.

THAT was a fun holiday!

Is this the OP blowing a gasket?

You're batshit crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is YOU.

Do you realize that in mother-father households, and particularly those with both sons and daughters, the human body is usually not taboo? My daughter saw her older brother naked from the day she was born. Nudity is not a problem.

Personally I wouldn't have a problem with a guest's tight underpants adjacent to morning coffee, although this is not how I raise my own son, but YOU as the homeowner have the right to request of guests that they dress with propriety. So go ahead and do that.

But from there to insinuating that your girls will be traumatized if they see anatomy they do not themselves possess is beyond crazy! Do your job as a parent and buy a kids' book about bodies and go from there, you silly goose.

My goodness.

You can blahblahblah all you want about how you’ve decided everyone in your household is free to run around nude. HOWEVER please keep in mind that just because it’s ok with you, does NOT mean your whole family is ok with it. My husband’s aunt and uncle were like you until their 15 year old daughter had a screaming meltdown during an extended family thanksgiving about how her dad and brother run around naked and in underwear and she is not allowed to say anything because their family is so free and enlightened despite the fact that all of these free swinging hot dogs have made her skin crawl since she was 7.

THAT was a fun holiday!

So... is this why you're a lesbian? You have a pathological fear of the male member?

Because no one in their right mind is using those words. You seem to be mentally unwell. I'm sorry, but please get help.

That poster referred to her husband, so it isn't the OP.

[Anonymous]

1) tell him to put more clothes on. Your house, your rules. Easy. Just say “BIL, can you please wear pants around the kids (or around the house or in public areas of our house/whatever phrasing makes sense to you)

2) teach your kids about anatomy. Seriously. You should’ve already done this. It’s important for kids to know basic info like this. And there’s nothing weird or shameful about someone’s body. It’s the most natural thing; stop being immaturely scared to discuss or acknowledge it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem is YOU.

Do you realize that in mother-father households, and particularly those with both sons and daughters, the human body is usually not taboo? My daughter saw her older brother naked from the day she was born. Nudity is not a problem.

Personally I wouldn't have a problem with a guest's tight underpants adjacent to morning coffee, although this is not how I raise my own son, but YOU as the homeowner have the right to request of guests that they dress with propriety. So go ahead and do that.

But from there to insinuating that your girls will be traumatized if they see anatomy they do not themselves possess is beyond crazy! Do your job as a parent and buy a kids' book about bodies and go from there, you silly goose.

My goodness.

You can blahblahblah all you want about how you’ve decided everyone in your household is free to run around nude. HOWEVER please keep in mind that just because it’s ok with you, does NOT mean your whole family is ok with it. My husband’s aunt and uncle were like you until their 15 year old daughter had a screaming meltdown during an extended family thanksgiving about how her dad and brother run around naked and in underwear and she is not allowed to say anything because their family is so free and enlightened despite the fact that all of these free swinging hot dogs have made her skin crawl since she was 7.

THAT was a fun holiday!

So... is this why you're a lesbian? You have a pathological fear of the male member?

Because no one in their right mind is using those words. You seem to be mentally unwell. I'm sorry, but please get help.

NP. Reading comprehension is fundamental. The PP refers to a husband. OP has a wife.