Spouse cannot handle credit cards
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Anonymous
I would try to address the problem at source, or at least work out what it is. What does he say when you ask why he changed it? |
Anonymous
Yes, this is a psychological issue, not a financial issue. Does he desire a sense of control over the payments, but lacks the executive functioning to wield that control responsibly? |
Anonymous
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Wow, op. I am dumbfounded that anyone who had the money would not pay in full, and would willing pay interest. I have no idea what would work on someone like that.
Have you shown them how much money they are paying in interest? Do they just say “ I don’t care.” I mean the only real thing that comes to mind is just mark the due date on your calendar and physically log-in to the account and pay balance in full. If you only have 1-2 credit cards it can’t be that much work or time. Before we went to autopay on everything I did that…had all cc due dates on my phone calendar and just logged in. If you are mad that they are not doing it then they can be mad you are doing it. At least you’ve saved money. Put the interest saved in a separate savings and after one year say you are buying something or travelling somewhere with the money they were going to throw away! Wishing you well but you can definitely solve this. Just pay the day before due. Easy! |
Anonymous
| During a time without emotion about this topic, ask or tell your spouse how much money was WASTED on interest. Maybe that will be the wake up call needed. If you have the money to pay off the card monthly than that is definitely money down the drain. So ridiculous! |
Anonymous
| Why do people think the spouse is a man? |
Anonymous
| Destroy his cards. Act like a child you get child like consequences. |
Anonymous
| Just set it to autopay. |
Anonymous
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I know a person who blacks out every time they have to think about numbers and money. They have several other problems including shopping for dopamine hit.
So many suggestions here how to fix it. I'd be worried about them taking out loans or anything involving money . |
Anonymous
| Does spouse explain when asked why they change it back? Why they want to carry and pay interest on huge balance? |
Anonymous
| I honestly thing it’s something to do with his upbringing, like some sort of psychological scarcity. His mom told that their lights would be turned off because his father didn’t pay the bill. His dad was wealthy, his current home is $5million. He’s never gotten any kind of help from his parents, he’s even paid every penny of college himself. I have asked him and he says he just likes to see the money in cash. I told him how much interest that cost us and we could have taken a nice trip. |
Anonymous
| I would divorce if my spouse is that clueless. |
Anonymous
It sounds like anxiety. Mental block indicates forgetfulness but they are actively not paying the cards if they are turning auto pay balance off. What would scare me is that they could be hiding other debt or have other unaddressed issues that could impact finances. I know this may sound extreme, but you may want to seek out a therapist or a financial therapist to discuss this with them since it’s an ongoing issue. And if you hide their card they’ll get a new card. |
Anonymous
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I don’t want to be the devils advocate, but credit card debt usually doesn’t happen overnight but accumulates over time.
How are you handling your finances otherwise? Is it always the spouse who must pay for groceries or do you also contribute? Is it always the spouse paying for car repairs and restaurant meals, travel expenses? |
Anonymous
| Smart people can be really dumb with money. I have relatives who are brilliant, multi talented, successful people who have the financial discipline of a 5 year old. |
Anonymous
| This thread has to be a joke, right? |