His credit card gave me the ick

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Am I crazy for this bothering me? Nice date and he pays. He uses a metallic card which caught my eye because it had shiny eye-catching flowers on it. I say that's a really pretty card, even the waitress noted it's a pretty card. I think he was embarrassed by us calling it pretty, because it's sort of feminine? Instead of admitting he ordered it, his face turned a little red and he says it's just the replacement version they sent them. I don't know if the feminine card bothered me or just his lack of agency. Whatever the case it's been bothering me all week.

You are not crazy for letting this bother you.

You are emotionally very immature and should be dating until you become more of an adult.

Making fun of a man (or, in the case of your target market, a boy) for having something that you perceive as "feminine" should have been left behind in grammar school.

The card is feminine, that's really not up for dispute, is it? I posted a photo of it above. However, I'm not saying that's what actually bothers me. I honestly think his embarrassment of it and failure to own it bothered me more. Or maybe a little of both. I'm not proud to say this, obviously. It's shallow, I guess.

It's a credit card, OP. It's not masculine or feminine. You made a comment about his card and he was defensive. You and the waitress were commenting on his "pretty" card and that sounds an awful lot like shaming him for not choosing something "masculine" as though that's even a thing for a credit card.

You also titled this post "His credit card gave me the ick" - if you meant "his refusal to be proud that he ordered the flower card instead of a different one gave me the ick" you should have titled the thread that instead.

You are not getting the responses you wanted and are trying to re-write the story to make you look less shallow. It's not working.

Pretty is not charged or passive-aggressive language. It is a pretty, eye-catching card! The waitress did not hear me call it pretty, she too said it was pretty when she dropped the card and receipts back at our table. You're suggesting the waitress was shaming him, too, when neither of us were.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Am I crazy for this bothering me? Nice date and he pays. He uses a metallic card which caught my eye because it had shiny eye-catching flowers on it. I say that's a really pretty card, even the waitress noted it's a pretty card. I think he was embarrassed by us calling it pretty, because it's sort of feminine? Instead of admitting he ordered it, his face turned a little red and he says it's just the replacement version they sent them. I don't know if the feminine card bothered me or just his lack of agency. Whatever the case it's been bothering me all week.

You are not crazy for letting this bother you.

You are emotionally very immature and should be dating until you become more of an adult.

Making fun of a man (or, in the case of your target market, a boy) for having something that you perceive as "feminine" should have been left behind in grammar school.

The card is feminine, that's really not up for dispute, is it? I posted a photo of it above. However, I'm not saying that's what actually bothers me. I honestly think his embarrassment of it and failure to own it bothered me more. Or maybe a little of both. I'm not proud to say this, obviously. It's shallow, I guess.

It's a credit card, OP. It's not masculine or feminine. You made a comment about his card and he was defensive. You and the waitress were commenting on his "pretty" card and that sounds an awful lot like shaming him for not choosing something "masculine" as though that's even a thing for a credit card.

You also titled this post "His credit card gave me the ick" - if you meant "his refusal to be proud that he ordered the flower card instead of a different one gave me the ick" you should have titled the thread that instead.

You are not getting the responses you wanted and are trying to re-write the story to make you look less shallow. It's not working.

Pretty is not charged or passive-aggressive language. It is a pretty, eye-catching card! The waitress did not hear me call it pretty, she too said it was pretty when she dropped the card and receipts back at our table. You're suggesting the waitress was shaming him, too, when neither of us were.

Of course you were. If you weren't, you wouldn't be posting about it today.

[Anonymous]

It’s his mom’s card. Obviously

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Am I crazy for this bothering me? Nice date and he pays. He uses a metallic card which caught my eye because it had shiny eye-catching flowers on it. I say that's a really pretty card, even the waitress noted it's a pretty card. I think he was embarrassed by us calling it pretty, because it's sort of feminine? Instead of admitting he ordered it, his face turned a little red and he says it's just the replacement version they sent them. I don't know if the feminine card bothered me or just his lack of agency. Whatever the case it's been bothering me all week.

You are not crazy for letting this bother you.

You are emotionally very immature and should be dating until you become more of an adult.

Making fun of a man (or, in the case of your target market, a boy) for having something that you perceive as "feminine" should have been left behind in grammar school.

The card is feminine, that's really not up for dispute, is it? I posted a photo of it above. However, I'm not saying that's what actually bothers me. I honestly think his embarrassment of it and failure to own it bothered me more. Or maybe a little of both. I'm not proud to say this, obviously. It's shallow, I guess.

It's a credit card, OP. It's not masculine or feminine. You made a comment about his card and he was defensive. You and the waitress were commenting on his "pretty" card and that sounds an awful lot like shaming him for not choosing something "masculine" as though that's even a thing for a credit card.

You also titled this post "His credit card gave me the ick" - if you meant "his refusal to be proud that he ordered the flower card instead of a different one gave me the ick" you should have titled the thread that instead.

You are not getting the responses you wanted and are trying to re-write the story to make you look less shallow. It's not working.

Pretty is not charged or passive-aggressive language. It is a pretty, eye-catching card! The waitress did not hear me call it pretty, she too said it was pretty when she dropped the card and receipts back at our table. You're suggesting the waitress was shaming him, too, when neither of us were.

Sure OP. You're giving off the same "icks" that you're claiming he gave off. Not owning up to things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Am I crazy for this bothering me? Nice date and he pays. He uses a metallic card which caught my eye because it had shiny eye-catching flowers on it. I say that's a really pretty card, even the waitress noted it's a pretty card. I think he was embarrassed by us calling it pretty, because it's sort of feminine? Instead of admitting he ordered it, his face turned a little red and he says it's just the replacement version they sent them. I don't know if the feminine card bothered me or just his lack of agency. Whatever the case it's been bothering me all week.

You are not crazy for letting this bother you.

You are emotionally very immature and should be dating until you become more of an adult.

Making fun of a man (or, in the case of your target market, a boy) for having something that you perceive as "feminine" should have been left behind in grammar school.

The card is feminine, that's really not up for dispute, is it? I posted a photo of it above. However, I'm not saying that's what actually bothers me. I honestly think his embarrassment of it and failure to own it bothered me more. Or maybe a little of both. I'm not proud to say this, obviously. It's shallow, I guess.

It's a credit card, OP. It's not masculine or feminine. You made a comment about his card and he was defensive. You and the waitress were commenting on his "pretty" card and that sounds an awful lot like shaming him for not choosing something "masculine" as though that's even a thing for a credit card.

You also titled this post "His credit card gave me the ick" - if you meant "his refusal to be proud that he ordered the flower card instead of a different one gave me the ick" you should have titled the thread that instead.

You are not getting the responses you wanted and are trying to re-write the story to make you look less shallow. It's not working.

Pretty is not charged or passive-aggressive language. It is a pretty, eye-catching card! The waitress did not hear me call it pretty, she too said it was pretty when she dropped the card and receipts back at our table. You're suggesting the waitress was shaming him, too, when neither of us were.

You wrote his credit card gave you the ick. Of course you are shaming him. Now you want to pretend your reaction was to something different

[Anonymous]

God, people are turned off by the most inane things. He paid for your dinner with an Amex platinum card. You’re making fun of him because of the chosen design on the card. Unless you’re worried it’s his mother’s or his wife’s, who cares.

[Anonymous]

Move on.
His flower patterned credit card was a deal breaker for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Am I crazy for this bothering me? Nice date and he pays. He uses a metallic card which caught my eye because it had shiny eye-catching flowers on it. I say that's a really pretty card, even the waitress noted it's a pretty card. I think he was embarrassed by us calling it pretty, because it's sort of feminine? Instead of admitting he ordered it, his face turned a little red and he says it's just the replacement version they sent them. I don't know if the feminine card bothered me or just his lack of agency. Whatever the case it's been bothering me all week.

You are not crazy for letting this bother you.

You are emotionally very immature and should be dating until you become more of an adult.

Making fun of a man (or, in the case of your target market, a boy) for having something that you perceive as "feminine" should have been left behind in grammar school.

The card is feminine, that's really not up for dispute, is it? I posted a photo of it above. However, I'm not saying that's what actually bothers me. I honestly think his embarrassment of it and failure to own it bothered me more. Or maybe a little of both. I'm not proud to say this, obviously. It's shallow, I guess.

It's a credit card, OP. It's not masculine or feminine. You made a comment about his card and he was defensive. You and the waitress were commenting on his "pretty" card and that sounds an awful lot like shaming him for not choosing something "masculine" as though that's even a thing for a credit card.

You also titled this post "His credit card gave me the ick" - if you meant "his refusal to be proud that he ordered the flower card instead of a different one gave me the ick" you should have titled the thread that instead.

You are not getting the responses you wanted and are trying to re-write the story to make you look less shallow. It's not working.

Pretty is not charged or passive-aggressive language. It is a pretty, eye-catching card! The waitress did not hear me call it pretty, she too said it was pretty when she dropped the card and receipts back at our table. You're suggesting the waitress was shaming him, too, when neither of us were.

You wrote his credit card gave you the ick. Of course you are shaming him. Now you want to pretend your reaction was to something different

It is in fact a feminine design, clearly marketed at women. And it is in fact a pretty card. That's not to say straight men can't carry it without giving women they're dating the ick. I am honestly not sure if the card itself bothered me as much or even at all. I think it was much more his insecurity about it, blaming the company for sending it to him, and defensive posture at two harmless, genuine compliments that it was a pretty card.

[Anonymous]

When little things like this bug you about a date, it's a sign you aren't particularly interested in them. If this was a guy that you were excited to see, you would have laughed and moved on or not noticed at all.

Getting "the ick" is just your brain looking for reasons to stop seeing someone. But here's the trick: you don't need a reason! You don't have to date anyone you're not excited about! But try not to be a child and create a narrative where he was feminine or insufficiently owning up to some flaw so that no longer seeing him is somehow his "fault." It's not, you're just not feeling him. Take ownership of your own lack of interest, and move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look lady this is the second time in a week you got the ick. Maybe the reason you are still single is because you are so picky.

I have literally never posted in this forum before.

In the 15 years I’ve been reading DCUM, I’ve never seen anyone use the phrase “gave me the ick” and all of a sudden twice in the past week someone posts that phrase about their date. Yeah, I’m not buying that you are only one of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look lady this is the second time in a week you got the ick. Maybe the reason you are still single is because you are so picky.

I have literally never posted in this forum before.

In the 15 years I’ve been reading DCUM, I’ve never seen anyone use the phrase “gave me the ick” and all of a sudden twice in the past week someone posts that phrase about their date. Yeah, I’m not buying that you are only one of them.

It's a trendy and mainstream phrase.

"something someone does that is an instant turn-off for you, making you instantly hate the idea of being with them romantically"

"an “ick” is most commonly known as something that’s a turnoff when you have romantic interest in someone. alternatively, it can be used to describe something that makes you uncomfortable or weirded out by"

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=the%20ick

[Anonymous]

Op, you give me the ick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look lady this is the second time in a week you got the ick. Maybe the reason you are still single is because you are so picky.

I have literally never posted in this forum before.

In the 15 years I’ve been reading DCUM, I’ve never seen anyone use the phrase “gave me the ick” and all of a sudden twice in the past week someone posts that phrase about their date. Yeah, I’m not buying that you are only one of them.

NP. “The ick” is an increasingly popular term that childish adult women use. OP might be one of several embarrassing posters using it here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look lady this is the second time in a week you got the ick. Maybe the reason you are still single is because you are so picky.

I have literally never posted in this forum before.

In the 15 years I’ve been reading DCUM, I’ve never seen anyone use the phrase “gave me the ick” and all of a sudden twice in the past week someone posts that phrase about their date. Yeah, I’m not buying that you are only one of them.

NP. “The ick” is an increasingly popular term that childish adult women use. OP might be one of several embarrassing posters using it here.

It’s really embarrassing. She needs to stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Am I crazy for this bothering me? Nice date and he pays. He uses a metallic card which caught my eye because it had shiny eye-catching flowers on it. I say that's a really pretty card, even the waitress noted it's a pretty card. I think he was embarrassed by us calling it pretty, because it's sort of feminine? Instead of admitting he ordered it, his face turned a little red and he says it's just the replacement version they sent them. I don't know if the feminine card bothered me or just his lack of agency. Whatever the case it's been bothering me all week.

You are not crazy for letting this bother you.

You are emotionally very immature and should be dating until you become more of an adult.

Making fun of a man (or, in the case of your target market, a boy) for having something that you perceive as "feminine" should have been left behind in grammar school.

The card is feminine, that's really not up for dispute, is it? I posted a photo of it above. However, I'm not saying that's what actually bothers me. I honestly think his embarrassment of it and failure to own it bothered me more. Or maybe a little of both. I'm not proud to say this, obviously. It's shallow, I guess.

It's a credit card, OP. It's not masculine or feminine. You made a comment about his card and he was defensive. You and the waitress were commenting on his "pretty" card and that sounds an awful lot like shaming him for not choosing something "masculine" as though that's even a thing for a credit card.

You also titled this post "His credit card gave me the ick" - if you meant "his refusal to be proud that he ordered the flower card instead of a different one gave me the ick" you should have titled the thread that instead.

You are not getting the responses you wanted and are trying to re-write the story to make you look less shallow. It's not working.

Pretty is not charged or passive-aggressive language. It is a pretty, eye-catching card! The waitress did not hear me call it pretty, she too said it was pretty when she dropped the card and receipts back at our table. You're suggesting the waitress was shaming him, too, when neither of us were.

You wrote his credit card gave you the ick. Of course you are shaming him. Now you want to pretend your reaction was to something different

It is in fact a feminine design, clearly marketed at women. And it is in fact a pretty card. That's not to say straight men can't carry it without giving women they're dating the ick. I am honestly not sure if the card itself bothered me as much or even at all. I think it was much more his insecurity about it, blaming the company for sending it to him, and defensive posture at two harmless, genuine compliments that it was a pretty card.

Nice revision of your title and OP to save face. You don’t have to have a good reason to break it off. But if you break it off and post for a dumb reason, we can all laugh at you when you post.