Husband making me feel self-conscious

[Anonymous]

You need to tell him to STFU. Not every thought in his head needs to be voiced. If he doesn’t understand, then ask him, why you would ever get naked with someone who criticizes your body.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m really struggling with my new body after having my first and my husband has made me feel very self-conscious. I don’t think his comments are coming for a hateful place but it still hurts me. He has made several comments about my breasts changing and my downstairs. He had commented on how he’s surprised I don’t fit into my old clothes yet. He’s a clueless man but his comments hurt me.

Ok so use your words and tell him. Don’t tell us.

[Anonymous]

Tell him to start saving for your downstairs tightening and tummy tuck.

[Anonymous]

What happened downstairs?

[Anonymous]

God damn. He's abusive. I am so sorry, OP. I couldn't stay with someone like that.

It sounds like you are just a few weeks postpartum, too?!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really hope OP is a troll. OP if this is real I am so sorry. Your husband is an enormous jackass, immature and a real prick. If my husband said such insensitive things to me during the very vulnerable time of new motherhood he would not be seeing my naked body again for a very long time and I would be pretty clear what I thought of him. What a jerk and definitely indicative of problems to come.

I wish but I’m not a troll. I do love my husband but I wish he had more of filter and kept some stuff to himself.

I’d be sad if my husband even had those thoughts, let alone said them out loud.

[Anonymous]

Does he watch a lot of porn?

[Anonymous]

Have you spoken to him directly to let him know how much his comments are affecting you?

If so - how does he respond??

Hopefully when he realizes how hurtful his words are to you, he will have the heart to stop. ❤️‍🩹

[Anonymous]

How long since you had the baby? I was back in my reg jeans 3 days later. I did not breastfed so my boobs did not sag or change really either. Bottle feeding was great bc DH or the nanny could feed the baby while I slept or got ready for the day. Consider your options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to tell him to STFU. Not every thought in his head needs to be voiced. If he doesn’t understand, then ask him, why you would ever get naked with someone who criticizes your body.

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[img]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m really struggling with my new body after having my first and my husband has made me feel very self-conscious. I don’t think his comments are coming for a hateful place but it still hurts me. He has made several comments about my breasts changing and my downstairs. He had commented on how he’s surprised I don’t fit into my old clothes yet. He’s a clueless man but his comments hurt me.

Your downstairs? You need to finish your basement?

Your language suggests your husband may not be "making" you feel this way, but exacerbating the way you already feel uncomfortable and self-conscious about your body.

Control the thing you can control: see a counselor or coach for some positivity and self-acceptance work. Then it won't matter as much what a man you describe as "clueless" thinks or says about the body that belongs to you, not him.

Curious as to why you married someone "clueless" about women, but I hope it works out for you.

This is non-explicit so I’m cautious of terms I use. He has talked about how tight I will be once we resume sex. If it will be vastly different.

Yeah, this is uncool. You just had a baby. That shouldn't be his worry, at least not one that he shares. He is being immature.

He has made “ thinking out loud” comments like if my breasts will be saggy after nursing. He’s a bit sad my very little pink areolas got darker. He doesn’t want my cute nipples to change. He loves how perky and full they are and heard that nursing longterm can make them look like sandbags.

He has soda vulgar stuff about if I will be tonight. Wondering if I will feel different.

One time while pregnant I got some stretch marks on my abdomen and he said I looked like a zebra and he didn’t think they would be that big.

Wow. He sounds like a prize ass.

Was he like this before you married? Was it cute to you then?

How old are both of you? He sounds immature and truthfully I would be rethinking my marriage. Double up on birth control and have him sleep in the guest bedroom. Your first priority is the baby who you carried for 9 months. Your body will bounce back but his comments will stick with you. I'm sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really hope OP is a troll. OP if this is real I am so sorry. Your husband is an enormous jackass, immature and a real prick. If my husband said such insensitive things to me during the very vulnerable time of new motherhood he would not be seeing my naked body again for a very long time and I would be pretty clear what I thought of him. What a jerk and definitely indicative of problems to come.

I wish but I’m not a troll. I do love my husband but I wish he had more of filter and kept some stuff to himself.

Honestly, your husband is an a$$ for even thinking those things, not just saying them out loud.

Tell him what he said was hurtful. If he doesn't care or change, don't have more kids with him.

[Anonymous]

Tell him he will not get to see you naked or have any sex until he fixes his horrible attitude and comments. What an ass.

[Anonymous]

This couldn't have been the first sign that he was misogynistic trash. Was he a "bad boy" and that's what drew you to him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How long since you had the baby? I was back in my reg jeans 3 days later. I did not breastfed so my boobs did not sag or change really either. Bottle feeding was great bc DH or the nanny could feed the baby while I slept or got ready for the day. Consider your options.

Go back to hell