Have you told friends that you are undergoing fertility treatments?

[Anonymous]

I have shared with a couple close friends-- it's just way too much of my life not to share without feeling like lying (or bursting with it all). I agree with the idea of not saying specific test dates, whcih people may ask you about in advance-- given advice on this board i actually exaggerated how much later a pregnancy test had to be with IVF b/c i did NOT want to have to answer "how are you doings" from people on their timeframe. when my cycle was finally successful i told them early (again, that's my personality not able to keep secrets in) and admitted i had fudged the dates...

[Anonymous]

when we first were going through fertility treatments we told very few people IRL. for us, it would have added too much stress to keep our friends/family informed. and a good chunk of them are clueless and would have innocently hurt with their stupid comments. most of our family knows now (and have since made stupid comments) and more friends (if it happens to come up).

when we cycled again recently I did tell more friends because I wasn't as emotionally fragile, but still didn't share with our clueless family.

but over the course of all of it I blogged and found great support through online forums.

[Anonymous]

I've told some friends. Some friends I am glad I said something as they really have been supportive, while others I regret telling. Not that those friends haven't been supportive, but sometimes they ask the stupidest questions. One asked if my husband and I were still trying and for some reason that really got on my nerves. And I get tired of her saying it will happen, it's just a matter of time, and I just have to be patient. It's actually gotten to the point where I avoid getting together with her because I just don't want to talk about it anymore.

As for family, they've been asking about our plans to have kids ever since my husband and I got married 4 years ago. My brothers and sisters keep telling me they're saving all their kids' toys and clothes for me. So finally I just told them we're going through fertility treatments and they have finally stopped questioning and pressuring.

[Anonymous]

I am not going through this now but I it took my husband and I two years to get pregnant. since I was soo excited to be a mom, everyone knew we were trying as I was kind of the first of my friends to "try". Next thing I know, we are still trying and my friends are popping out babies like popcorn. I am not one to be very secretive..what you see is what you get with me and therefore almost all my friends and our families knew. In my opinion, it gave me support and helped me through it. everyone is different though. If you feel like you will not benefit from telling your friends and/or family, than don't. I just know it helped my husband and I. You would be surprised how many people go through similar issues and that you are sooooo not alone. I wish you so much luck. I know it is so emotionally and mentally draining!!