Yorktown HS — Opted out of SEL

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I did not realize we could opt out of SEL. My kids are in middle school but it seems like a giant waste of time. I would much rather have my kids have time to do homework, or not have homeroom at all and just spend more time in class.


The point of homeroom is to build community and for kids to have consistent time with a trusted adult. For those who need that. It’s invaluable.


I absolutely don't understand how the SEL lectures during advisory time/homeroom are building community. At DHMS, the kids sit there, listen to a lecture, and then are supposed to sit quietly and think about it. And, despite asking, the lessons aren't published anywhere. I second that idea that homework time would be much more useful. Or actual time to speak with their peers. Whatever SEL is supposed to be, surely what it actually is isn't it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My high schooler says it is a giant waste of time and sometimes delivered over the announcement system. Please tell me how that is effective or even moderately helpful.

The kids that really need it aren’t benefiting by having some random teacher read from whatever nonsense they are given.

And in ES it raised issues that caused more harm than good. The counselor was awful and tried to make kid hug another kid as part of it. Wtf?! No thanks.


If they are in YHS that is wrong- it's never over the PA system.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My high schooler says it is a giant waste of time and sometimes delivered over the announcement system. Please tell me how that is effective or even moderately helpful.

The kids that really need it aren’t benefiting by having some random teacher read from whatever nonsense they are given.

And in ES it raised issues that caused more harm than good. The counselor was awful and tried to make kid hug another kid as part of it. Wtf?! No thanks.


If they are in YHS that is wrong- it's never over the PA system.


+1

There’s actually been some pretty helpful lessons like essay writing/college applications
Anonymous
different FCPS, let our kid opt out of SEL and they were able to go to the library instead.
Anonymous
Can you imagine being the poor kid whose parents opted them out of this, that has to leave the room? All the other kids think their parents are weirdos.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Can you imagine being the poor kid whose parents opted them out of this, that has to leave the room? All the other kids think their parents are weirdos.


I’d really love to hear OP’s reasoning for pulling them out on those days, especially since every teacher we’ve encountered would be fine with the student sitting quietly doing homework homework instead of engaging in the lesson.
Anonymous
If your kid is “lucky” they get a teacher who doesn’t bother to do any of the lessons anyway.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My high schooler says it is a giant waste of time and sometimes delivered over the announcement system. Please tell me how that is effective or even moderately helpful.

The kids that really need it aren’t benefiting by having some random teacher read from whatever nonsense they are given.

And in ES it raised issues that caused more harm than good. The counselor was awful and tried to make kid hug another kid as part of it. Wtf?! No thanks.


If they are in YHS that is wrong- it's never over the PA system.


+1

There’s actually been some pretty helpful lessons like essay writing/college applications

That's not SEL.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Can you imagine being the poor kid whose parents opted them out of this, that has to leave the room? All the other kids think their parents are weirdos.


Actually, they'd be jealous.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My high schooler says it is a giant waste of time and sometimes delivered over the announcement system. Please tell me how that is effective or even moderately helpful.

The kids that really need it aren’t benefiting by having some random teacher read from whatever nonsense they are given.

And in ES it raised issues that caused more harm than good. The counselor was awful and tried to make kid hug another kid as part of it. Wtf?! No thanks.


If they are in YHS that is wrong- it's never over the PA system.


+1

There’s actually been some pretty helpful lessons like essay writing/college applications

That's not SEL.


It all occurs during the same time.. The SEL lesson doesn’t take the entire patriot period. Were you not paying attention at back to school night? Were you that dad in the corner on his phone ignoring the teacher because you thought it was all about SEL which you don’t agree with?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Can you imagine being the poor kid whose parents opted them out of this, that has to leave the room? All the other kids think their parents are weirdos.


Actually, they'd be jealous.


Exactly. These kids have homework and other things to do than listen to a teacher reads slides about their teenage emotions.
TheSpanishDoctor
Member Offline
This is RULER's Year 1/Lesson 1: https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1J0sP7rfikEl8KpObVeVDvbO4qwm4gJfdoMFQVvmBHVw/edit?usp=sharing.

I'm curious to know what "the research" says about non-SEL experts, such as myself, being asked to teach SEL lessons.

Anyway, here are some highlights.

Slide 2: Day 1 with these lessons and we're supposed to ask, "Has anyone ever had a conflict with a family member where there was a disagreement that escalated and emotions got out of hand?" Yes, let's revisit some trauma.

Slide 5: "Each of you will pick a role and re-enact the scene so that an agreement is reached that is acceptable both people. (sic)" This slide was optional. We did not do this. I commented to the instructional aide that we would not be doing what John Bender did in the Breakfast Club. (I think she got the reference.)

Slide 9: Watch the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence count to 10.

In my Patriot Period, we (I mean mostly "I") only talked about slides 7 and 9.

Does anyone else want teachers and kids to have 30 minutes of their day back?
Anonymous
TheSpanishDoctor wrote:This is RULER's Year 1/Lesson 1: https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1J0sP7rfikEl8KpObVeVDvbO4qwm4gJfdoMFQVvmBHVw/edit?usp=sharing.

I'm curious to know what "the research" says about non-SEL experts, such as myself, being asked to teach SEL lessons.

Anyway, here are some highlights.

Slide 2: Day 1 with these lessons and we're supposed to ask, "Has anyone ever had a conflict with a family member where there was a disagreement that escalated and emotions got out of hand?" Yes, let's revisit some trauma.

Slide 5: "Each of you will pick a role and re-enact the scene so that an agreement is reached that is acceptable both people. (sic)" This slide was optional. We did not do this. I commented to the instructional aide that we would not be doing what John Bender did in the Breakfast Club. (I think she got the reference.)

Slide 9: Watch the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence count to 10.

In my Patriot Period, we (I mean mostly "I") only talked about slides 7 and 9.

Does anyone else want teachers and kids to have 30 minutes of their day back?


I'm the DHMS parent above, and these were my EXACT questions to the school and all I received was the response that the new rule is to teach the SEL lessons during their advisory period/Phoenix Time. I have no beef with SEL, but it seems like APS admin is doing yet another roll out of yet another curriculum change with no thought. Taking up the teachers and students time, and no thought as to why or how to do it, except that it is a thing that people have deemed worthy right now (and, again, I think SEL is worthy). For context, I witnessed a person die (like in front of me, eyes rolling back the whole thing) in middle school that then started years of family conflict and trauma. There would have been NO healthy way for me to discuss that during my advisory period with an untrained teacher and my peers. Just the idea is traumatic and I'm 52 now. Also, good reference to John Bender. I hope that, like me, he pulled himself up in life, but I have my doubts.
Anonymous
Re: DHMS, they’ve been doing SEL during TA or Phoenix time since day 1.

I have no problem with my kids learning about conflict resolution, organizing schoolwork, or playing games with other kids. It’s time well spent for that small chunk of the day.

Parents who have an issue with that are seriously fcked in the head.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Re: DHMS, they’ve been doing SEL during TA or Phoenix time since day 1.

I have no problem with my kids learning about conflict resolution, organizing schoolwork, or playing games with other kids. It’s time well spent for that small chunk of the day.

Parents who have an issue with that are seriously fcked in the head.



Definitely sounds like you needs some SEL. Glad your kid is getting it at school, even if it's poorly thought out. And no, no it's not the same as last year. And every teacher handles it differently. Which is itself a problem. You should think on maybe some therapy? DBT doesn't have to go on forever and could help with thoughts and responses like this, especially if they interfere with your IRL relationships or work.
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