Best way to wake tween?

[Anonymous]

Maybe turn her light on completely when you usually start slow. Nothing wakes me more than bright light

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:6:20am start means 8:30pm bedtime. Anything less is harming her health.

Why is the start so early?

DP, but my 7th grader has to be at school at 7:25, so in order to get ready for the day and make it to school on time they have to be up between 6:20-6:30. I also understand that in an ideal world 10 hours of sleep would be great but you cannot force a 12 year old to go to sleep at 8:30 pm, they aren’t babies. You can definitely do things like electronics cut off at 8, etc., but the idea that you can force a tween/teen to fall asleep at a certain time is ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:alarm clock and natural consequences when they aren’t up on time.

This. WTH! She isn’t 5. She needs to grow the f up. Buy her an alarm clock and of she is late she will receive consequences from the school. 🙄

[Anonymous]

We're feeling this, too. Everyone who says get her an alarm? My daughter sleeps through the smoke detector in her room when it goes off. She slept through a car accident that happened right outside our house and sounded like a bomb going off. She goes to sleep between 8:30 and 9:00 every night. It's like trying to wake the dead at 6:15.

[Anonymous]

+1 for Alarm clock away from her bed in the room. and natural consequences.

We had an issue today with our DD, 12. She forgot to set her alarm so I was nice this AM. I knocked on the door, told her the time, kept her door open and turned on the bright light in the hallway. I let her know no one was driving her to school this AM (we sometimes do if she is ready early and asks politely but mostly she walks the mile to and from school by herself and knows she will not get a ride if she does not get herself out of bed on time. )

Usually we have no problems because she sets her alarm and gets up on her own. She knows if she fails to get up and is late to school she has to deal with the consequences. She also clearly remembers that last spring she overslept and did poorly on a quiz because the teacher went over material in class that was not covered elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:+1 for Alarm clock away from her bed in the room. and natural consequences.

We had an issue today with our DD, 12. She forgot to set her alarm so I was nice this AM. I knocked on the door, told her the time, kept her door open and turned on the bright light in the hallway. I let her know no one was driving her to school this AM (we sometimes do if she is ready early and asks politely but mostly she walks the mile to and from school by herself and knows she will not get a ride if she does not get herself out of bed on time. )

Usually we have no problems because she sets her alarm and gets up on her own. She knows if she fails to get up and is late to school she has to deal with the consequences. She also clearly remembers that last spring she overslept and did poorly on a quiz because the teacher went over material in class that was not covered elsewhere.

This natural consequences approach only works for walkers. Our middle school is 3 miles away. She misses the bus, she loses her phone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are being WAY too nice, with the low light and gently waking her up. She needs 2 alarms with one located across the room.

Exactly, not surprising one of this crap wakes her up. Alarm clock multiple if need be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:An alarm clock is a health alarm. Every day the alarm wakes a person, that's a little bit brain damage from poor sleep.

Um, no.

[Anonymous]

My DH (former Marine) barges in, banging on the door yelling, “WAKE UP YOU LAZY LIMA BEAN!!!”

DS hates it so it’s motivated him to not hit the snooze button. He also moved his alarm clock across the room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We're feeling this, too. Everyone who says get her an alarm? My daughter sleeps through the smoke detector in her room when it goes off. She slept through a car accident that happened right outside our house and sounded like a bomb going off. She goes to sleep between 8:30 and 9:00 every night. It's like trying to wake the dead at 6:15.

https://www.amazon.com/Sonic-Alert-SBB500SS-Extra-Loud-Flashing/dp/B000OOWZUK/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.XCDg9Xps1AZpZ0p-WlX6PmOfij_8fB2e_-Di_T4usPZkZqXq5oPgD_UxQJy6m6_pT1m0DswEbokEHydwRY5NYby1bP65ebT4YfgpaHs6ouMAdx3PVvIinv2UWo3Uit4bAiqFX9ArqYPQQYAb5NXvbyZXnWqNUmpjwotP0hkNyPBTA2w_g7eHiorta7tsekOIp_HH3jk3_hmhN5ZDW85bKeoUhJn9bpucY5ULBu95VamFLvCSeqEmNV8JJajdZVsx2mjTNfCC3IJXK5lhgWHUApWYcOxDn6ZHE9I3IN8goHU.EdeVGOy5Ugv8aYx2h0Pby8zJMRA_RF1KI2G6Uv8PTHU&dib_tag=se&keywords=bed+shaking+alarm+clock&qid=1728482426&sr=8-1-spons&sp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9hdGY&psc=1

Shakes the bed. My oldest is like this too but she’s learned to get up on her own. She’s now 21 in college with 8 am classes that she rarely misses. It takes time but they can learn to get up.

[Anonymous]

My niece and her friends swear by having this runaway alarm clock set across the room.
https://www.sharperimage.com/view/product/Alarm+Clock+on+Wheels/207718

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, she is making concerted efforts to go to bed by 9-9:30pm, which isn’t an easy thing to start getting ready for bed by 8:30 at that age with evening activities and age.

Today we ended up driving her to school because she missed the bus.

Natural consequences seem like they impact us more than her. If we made her walk, she would revolt and not go, missing a day of school as an unexcused absence (walking came up as a threat, but honestly it is over a mile and along a busy road so I don’t like it as a choice).

Why is it taking a half hour+ to get ready for bed?

Is she in too many activities?

If activities run late the only thing she should be doing is hitting the shower and going to bed.

Seems like there's an overhaul of her entire schedule and time management needed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, she is making concerted efforts to go to bed by 9-9:30pm, which isn’t an easy thing to start getting ready for bed by 8:30 at that age with evening activities and age.

Today we ended up driving her to school because she missed the bus.

Natural consequences seem like they impact us more than her. If we made her walk, she would revolt and not go, missing a day of school as an unexcused absence (walking came up as a threat, but honestly it is over a mile and along a busy road so I don’t like it as a choice).

Why is it taking a half hour+ to get ready for bed?

Is she in too many activities?

If activities run late the only thing she should be doing is hitting the shower and going to bed.

Seems like there's an overhaul of her entire schedule and time management needed

DP, do you recommend any specific time management resources? My kid will absolutely futz around doing nothing meaningful whenever it's time to go to bed or really whenever allowed. Consequences only work as long as consequences are enforced. At some point, I want her to own it.

[Anonymous]

Some people aren't morning people. I certainly am not and neither are my kids. All you can do is let her sleep in on weekends and try to get her to bed earlier.

The tyranny of the morning people is so tiresome as is being treated as lazy because your chronotype means that you thrive later in the day. TBH morning people tend to be less creative/interesting. They want to get up and like exercise and work/clean. The fact that they seem to be in charge of so many scheduling decisions is mystifying and just feels like some Puritanical holdover.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH (former Marine) barges in, banging on the door yelling, “WAKE UP YOU LAZY LIMA BEAN!!!”

DS hates it so it’s motivated him to not hit the snooze button. He also moved his alarm clock across the room.

I'm going to start calling my kids lima beans. Thank you for this.