Christmas dinner expectations

[Anonymous]

I cannot remember what my mom used to serve on Christmas day for dinner each year. I do remember every Christmas eve we would order a huge chinese takeout order. We all saved our fortunes and would write the year and our initials on it. My parents passed away years ago but I still have the little xmas tin filled with all our fortunes that now my family reads and adds to each year.

Anyway, my point is that yes, give yourself a break - not everything needs to be picture perfect. Phone something in - you can still turn it into a fun tradition.

[Anonymous]

I like to cook and love the holidays so I try to make special things. But I've been pulling back the past couple years especially if its just our nuclear family. I ask everyone to pick one favorite item and I make those - not everything. I also started buying sides from local restaurants so I'm not making so many things from scratch.

[Anonymous]

Not exactly the same, but we struggled with what to do for the holidays after my dad passed away, because we didn't want to do exactly the same meals we had done for years - because then it would really highlight that everything else was different, except that he wasn't there. At the same time, grief counselling tells you to celebrate in a way that feels right, not just pretend the holiday didn't happen. So, I get the whole emotional expectations versus execution thing. We're also a very small family. And it's true - it's mostly about reframing what your idea of 'special' is. It doesn't have to be massively complicated, nor homemade.

Another thing I would do is google/pinterest/instagram search (wherever you tend to find menu inspiration) for small family holidays - there are menus and plans specifically for this kind of thing.

Personally for us we switched from apps or Mexican on Christmas Eve (we like variety with these types of meals, and making 10 different apps or tamales plus empanadas plus enchiladas for a few people didn't make sense). Now, Christmas Eve is a made-ahead Ina pasta - her sausage with rigatoni and fennel. It's special and indulgent because it's delicious and a bit effortful but it makes well ahead. That plus salad and storebought cannolis for dessert and Christmas Eve is done.

Christmas breakfast is a make-ahead croissant bacon breakfast bread pudding plus some fruit, etc. It's delicious but again - make ahead.

Christmas dinner we've mixed it up, but Ina's oven beef tenderloins are pretty low-intervention but certainly fancy - and the blue cheese sauce or bernaise or whatever is special. Or a roast duck (smaller but still special). One year we switched Thanksgiving to Cornish game hens.

As other people have pointed out, nothing wrong with going out or getting takeout for one of the meals either - I know a family whose Christmas Eve tradition is Chinese.

You've got this OP - it can be less work for you AND special. Maybe search Christmas menu threads on here too - every year there's a few of them and I've gotten great ideas from there in the past too.

[Anonymous]

It can feel special AND not be hard. What matters most to you, and maybe to your husband and son? My grandmother annually made a special breakfast bread that took 24hrs by the time it had double rested and been baked. She spent a long time Christmas Eve, and then was up early on Christmas to put it in the oven. I was committed to doing the same thing, until I did it one time. It had been fun to do it with her, but I am not a baker and it felt like a chore rather than a fun tradition. I now order the same bread from a local bakery and it's just as good.

Things can be special and tradition without being complicated or stressful. I love the idea of Christmas Eve always being heavy apps or Chinese or whatever works for your family. For us on the 24th it's soup, green salad and Christmas cookies for dessert. On Christmas Day we use the nice linens and china, which for my only child makes it feel special even if the food ends up not being super fancy.

[Anonymous]

Cook for Christmas Eve,, Do Brunch CHristmas morning..kits a totally different choice of foods and usually easier. Christmas Dinner leftovers from the night before or Chinese.

[Anonymous]

When it’s just our family, we go out to a special meal for Christmas and I have zero concerns that that won’t make good memories for my kids. Last year, we went to brunch at the Four Seasons in Georgetown on Christmas Day and it was wonderful.

[Anonymous]

Cooking three meals is way too much. Even my large Italian family doesn't do that. It's generally takeout on December 23rd, huge dinner and dessert table on Christmas Eve, Christmas morning breakfast is whatever (could be some toasted panettone, fruit from the fruit platter, or even cookies or other leftover desserts with coffee), and Christmas day dinner is the leftovers from the night before, using the fancy plates again.

I think you can either pare down some of the side dishes, or still make the huge meal with the sides on Christmas Eve, with enough leftovers for Christmas day. It's still special because it's food you only have a couple of times a year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I cannot remember what my mom used to serve on Christmas day for dinner each year. I do remember every Christmas eve we would order a huge chinese takeout order. We all saved our fortunes and would write the year and our initials on it. My parents passed away years ago but I still have the little xmas tin filled with all our fortunes that now my family reads and adds to each year.

Anyway, my point is that yes, give yourself a break - not everything needs to be picture perfect. Phone something in - you can still turn it into a fun tradition.

Awww - that Chinese fortune cookie story made me smile! That's sweet.

Christmas Eve is always casual, either Chinese food or takeout, but as someone pointed out it's really special because of the plating and decor. We use the china, light the candles, etc. Christmas morning, my DH makes french toast, I make eggs, and we have a fruit salad. Then Christmas dinner is a large family affair where everyone contributes to the meal.