Helping MIL and DH figure out how much care FIL w/ Alzheimer's needs

[Anonymous]

OP - It is good that your DH is consulting an Eldercare lawyer who can help him and MIL make sound decisions on funding care. At this point, looking at places with a Memory Care program seems like wisest move given the level of 24/7 personal care needed. Such a loss if skills woukd be expected in a Memory setting, but not in AL.

In terms o Medicaid, you may want to look at all levels to see how beds are filled when there is an opening — mostly from folks who are already a resident in IL or AL or a person who comes into Memory or nursing as private pay directly? i am
not sure is Medicaid pays for memory, so will just say that if assets are limited, looking at the smalller private home care places which accept and seem to provide goof care might be your wisest path to consider.

[Anonymous]

MIL needs to consult a competent, experienced attorney who is expert in Medicare issues. Look for a person affiliated with the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys. This is not for amateurs or people who “think” they understand the system. Some of the PP’s suggestions, while well meant, suggest a very limited comprehension of the available options.

[Anonymous]

As for when to move FIL, there is a balance to be struck between MIL’s physical, financial and other welfare and her need not to feel like she dumped her beloved spouse in a kennel somewhere. There are good places, but more than a few “memory care” facilities make bank on exactly where that balance point lies, charging private rates for care no better than what is available at less expense elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

I’m confused by your post. If he gets Medicaid for a nursing home there should be no cost to mil but mil will have to pay a portion or most of his social security. Yes, lot at los of places but few will accept Medicaid. You should not be paying extra. That does it sound right or allowed by Medicaid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MIL needs to consult a competent, experienced attorney who is expert in Medicare issues. Look for a person affiliated with the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys. This is not for amateurs or people who “think” they understand the system. Some of the PP’s suggestions, while well meant, suggest a very limited comprehension of the available options.

No they don’t. Stop telling people to watste money they don’t has r. If dad got Medicaid they follow the rules.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - It is good that your DH is consulting an Eldercare lawyer who can help him and MIL make sound decisions on funding care. At this point, looking at places with a Memory Care program seems like wisest move given the level of 24/7 personal care needed. Such a loss if skills woukd be expected in a Memory setting, but not in AL.

In terms o Medicaid, you may want to look at all levels to see how beds are filled when there is an opening — mostly from folks who are already a resident in IL or AL or a person who comes into Memory or nursing as private pay directly? i am
not sure is Medicaid pays for memory, so will just say that if assets are limited, looking at the smalller private home care places which accept and seem to provide goof care might be your wisest path to consider.

Medicaid does not pay Al or il. And at his level he needs memory care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:MIL needs to consult a competent, experienced attorney who is expert in Medicare issues. Look for a person affiliated with the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys. This is not for amateurs or people who “think” they understand the system. Some of the PP’s suggestions, while well meant, suggest a very limited comprehension of the available options.

No they don’t. Stop telling people to watste money they don’t has r. If dad got Medicaid they follow the rules.

I’d suggest some remedial grammar study before opining on the value of legal services with regard to matters you obviously do not even begin to comprehend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here is the problem, OP. If they are looking at MediCAID nursing homes, they will take the money your ILs have and leave the "community spouse" with a monthly stipend to live on. Depending on how long your FIL lives, they might also take the house.

Make sure you understand what you're getting into.

My parents live in NJ so it might be different in MD, but medicaid can't "take the house." In order to qualify for medicaid in NJ, the assets of the healthy spouse need to be less than $X amount and don't including the house, car, and some expenses like funeral expenses and home repairs. The idea is not to drive the surviving spouse (further) into poverty.