Dating with teens

[Anonymous]

My teen boys (13 and 15) kind of probably know I’m dating… one saw a hinge notification pop up once and they know I go out when they aren’t there. I think they’d just as soon not think about it too much, since I’ve assured them they will not have a stepdad anytime soon. I’ve had the same concern as OP since I live close to my ex - kids could drop in unexpected. If I had a man in the house I would introduce them (“this is John”) and let them think what they want and ask or not ask. But I do have the same worry as OP when “John” stays over. we keep the unclothed activities in my bedroom so if I heard them come in I could go downstairs without him. When they start driving I might make a “text before you come over” rule.

And to PP, it’s totally different than being caught with their dad. Kids are self involved - they will start to worry about how the new guy will impact them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP is talking about getting caught having sex.

I think you should tell them you are dating nothing wrong with it, I also think you should keep them separate until and if you want him to be a permanent part of your life.


As for not wanting to get caught having sex, well don't do it at your house.

By that logic, should married couples refrain from having sex too in case they get caught? :roll:

You are not this stupid. You know good and well that was not the sentiment of the comment. Don't embarrass yourself and annoy others with your feigned idiocy.

[Anonymous]

My son accidentally met my now-husband on our second date when I was making him dinner and my son decided he wanted to stay at my place that night. At that age it was a choice that my XH and I always accommodated.

I introduced him as a friend, my son ate dinner with us and went to his room to play video games. I had a more family friendly night than anticipated. We laugh about it now.

[Anonymous]

OP, I think it's a strange thing to hide from your kids, especially at that age. I'm single and have several single-mom friends. In t his group of women I know our kids are middle school all the way to college aged and all of our kids are aware that we date. It's such a normal and acceptable thing to do, why are you hiding it?

[Anonymous]

They're not as dumb as you think.

[Anonymous]

A couple of years ago I was dating a woman and, due to some very enjoyable but unforeseen circumstances, she ended up staying at my place later into the evening than either of us anticipated. The woman's daughter started to worry and began texting, and the daughter got even more worried when her mom ignored her increasingly frantic texts. Finally the daughter called.

The woman picked up the phone and carried it out of my bedroom. Suddenly I heard her scream.

"It's video! It's video."

The woman was frantically running around, trying to cover her body, which was difficult because she wasn't wearing anything at all.

Meanwhile, the daughter was yelling "Mommy, what are you doing????" The daughter was college age and already was sexually active herself, but she was still shocked to catch her mom naked at a man's house.

Earlier this year I found myself talking to though woman, even though we don't date anymore. She told me that her daughter now says she didn't notice anything unusual and doesn't remember the video call.

[Anonymous]

My GF has an app installed on her teenager’s phones (360 or something). She knows where they are at all times.

[Anonymous]

Start by being honest with them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A couple of years ago I was dating a woman and, due to some very enjoyable but unforeseen circumstances, she ended up staying at my place later into the evening than either of us anticipated. The woman's daughter started to worry and began texting, and the daughter got even more worried when her mom ignored her increasingly frantic texts. Finally the daughter called.

The woman picked up the phone and carried it out of my bedroom. Suddenly I heard her scream.

"It's video! It's video."

The woman was frantically running around, trying to cover her body, which was difficult because she wasn't wearing anything at all.

Meanwhile, the daughter was yelling "Mommy, what are you doing????" The daughter was college age and already was sexually active herself, but she was still shocked to catch her mom naked at a man's house.

Earlier this year I found myself talking to though woman, even though we don't date anymore. She told me that her daughter now says she didn't notice anything unusual and doesn't remember the video call.

I love that she doesn’t remember that. Sounds like an awesome night!

[Anonymous]

By the way, why are you talking to this woman about “that time your daughter called when we were naked.”
How does one have that conversation? And should I expect one in my future? Amazing !

[Anonymous]

My teens know that I’m dating and it’s no big deal. He doesn’t spend time here when they are here but they have met him. They like him but I’m not trying to make a strong connection until the relationship is truly serious. But I’m in no rush to get there.