Supplementing a sub-par school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I cannot afford to move out of the urban school my kid is in: I ideally would like to like in a suburb with good schools but I can’t afford it.

Issues I’m running into include my kid getting good grades, but testing very poorly in math in spite of high grades. There are a lot of social and behavioral issues with the kids at my daughter’s school. A lot of the values amongst the other students don’t match the values i try to teach at home.

For math: use Khan Academy each summer. First review the last year’s math, then do the “ready for” class for the next year’s math.

For behavior/values: join a church (or similar) whose values more closely align with your own. (Doesn’t have to be religious. I think a lot of families use sports for this one.)

I once taught a kid who went to my church. He was a super sweet kid so I was excited to have him in my class. Turns out he was just as badly behaved as all the other kids when he was surrounded by them. He just knew all the right things to say on Sunday morning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would move to the suburbs, even if that means getting a 1 or 2 bedroom apartment. The madness of the lottery in enough to make me move away.

That's qite an assumption that OP doesn't already live in a one- or two-bedroom apartment!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I cannot afford to move out of the urban school my kid is in: I ideally would like to like in a suburb with good schools but I can’t afford it.

Issues I’m running into include my kid getting good grades, but testing very portly in math in spite of high grades. There are a lot of social and behavioral issues with the kids at my daughter’s school. A lot of the values amongst the other students don’t match the values i try to teach at home.

I'm curious. Prices in the suburbs are generally less than the city.

Are you living with family or something like that?

[Anonymous]

For previous posters that mentioned travel. Can you explain more about how this supplements? Being sincere not snarky in my inquiry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I cannot afford to move out of the urban school my kid is in: I ideally would like to like in a suburb with good schools but I can’t afford it.

Issues I’m running into include my kid getting good grades, but testing very portly in math in spite of high grades. There are a lot of social and behavioral issues with the kids at my daughter’s school. A lot of the values amongst the other students don’t match the values i try to teach at home.

I'm curious. Prices in the suburbs are generally less than the city.

Are you living with family or something like that?

DP. I can afford places that are about 1.5 hr away from my job, but that commute won’t work with my family set up. Sometimes “afford” includes more than just the price of housing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For previous posters that mentioned travel. Can you explain more about how this supplements? Being sincere not snarky in my inquiry.

I took my kids to Japan last year. Seeing the world through a different culture’s eyes taught them so much.

[Anonymous]

If OP is worried about elementary school math specifically there are plenty of choices. Kumon and Russian School of Math come to mind, but I’m sure there are others that people could suggest. Also my what about the online work that the school provides? ST Math/iReady/Reflex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I cannot afford to move out of the urban school my kid is in: I ideally would like to like in a suburb with good schools but I can’t afford it.

Issues I’m running into include my kid getting good grades, but testing very portly in math in spite of high grades. There are a lot of social and behavioral issues with the kids at my daughter’s school. A lot of the values amongst the other students don’t match the values i try to teach at home.

I'm curious. Prices in the suburbs are generally less than the city.

Are you living with family or something like that?

DP. I can afford places that are about 1.5 hr away from my job, but that commute won’t work with my family set up. Sometimes “afford” includes more than just the price of housing.

Without OP naming the school it’s hard to assess. But there are certainly affordable 1 bedrooms near metros with schools that are decent if not great.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For previous posters that mentioned travel. Can you explain more about how this supplements? Being sincere not snarky in my inquiry.

I took my kids to Japan last year. Seeing the world through a different culture’s eyes taught them so much.

lololol!!! look if you have money to take multiple kids to Japan then you’ve got a different thing going on than OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For previous posters that mentioned travel. Can you explain more about how this supplements? Being sincere not snarky in my inquiry.

this is what people with younger kids say, who basically are relying on their socio-economic status to take the place of concerns about not being in a more homogeneously affluent school district. “We travel and talk about books!” This works for younger kids not older.

[Anonymous]

I second: serious music lessons. Among many things. Think of the talent that surrounds you. You live a world class city.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For previous posters that mentioned travel. Can you explain more about how this supplements? Being sincere not snarky in my inquiry.

They learn stuff just by observing other cultures and the experience of traveling, being flexible, appreciating differences, and seeing and doing things that are not available at home. They can also practice their language skills in a more immersive setting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your kid goes to a sub-par city school, in what ways do you supplement their education to help them excel in life?

Supplementing is great but stops working in middle and high school. They actually need to go to schools with challenging classes.

And more importantly peers who challenge them.

[Anonymous]

Elementary school: Read, Read, Read, Read (read to your kid and let your kid see you reading). Sign up for active things (a sport, martial arts, etc.); intellectual things (chess, robotics, battle of the books, etc.); and anything you can do for math and language like a tutor or fun online math games.

Middle school: focus on organizational (executive skills) always go to school unless actually sick, always be on time, always do and turn in homework (with name on it); redo homework and retake tests and take advantage of extra credit and start them doing their own laundry and odd jobs where possible to earn and understand money; math tutor if needed, try to keep the reading going, and something to reinforce the values, including discussions at the dinner table about current events, etc.. Scouts is a big one because it teaches the values and valuable life skills. But, church or sports or other activity to keep them active, engaged, and around others with goals.

High school: If you have done all you can, they will now hopefully be on a path to want all this for themselves and you continue to support school (tutors), extra-curricular, odd jobs, etc.

Talk about college. As a regular thing from elementary school on. Not hammering it into them but as part of life. Ideally, help steer them to the kids and friends and families that also want these things.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for all the suggestions and explaining benefits of travel experience for kids.