Wedding gift if no invite?

[Anonymous]

I would not just send a card to mark an occasion that could arguably be called gift-worthy. Waste of resources and anti-climatic to open- regardless of years together or wealth. Send a fruit basket or similar with congrats written by company.

[Anonymous]

Probably $200 or so, in a nice card.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Probably $200 or so, in a nice card.

PP. Adding; But only if I got some kind of formal announement.

[Anonymous]

Please. They’re already married and have been married for a very long time. They’re also choosing not to celebrate with guests, which I think is good. It would be far more ridiculous for them to have a wedding and expect people to spend a bunch of money flying in for it.

I wouldn’t send anything other than a card.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Once you get the announcement send a card. If no announcement, I'd do nothing. They have money and are established with kids, so it's not the usual wedding of two young people who lack everything, who the wedding gifts are for.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our oldest nephew is 30. His family moved to the West Coast and we see him briefly every few years if his parents are in town for an event like a funeral or wedding - otherwise, no contact. He and his fiance have two children - when they lived here, I met the fiance twice, briefly, saw their daughter once, never got to meet their son.

He is a lucrative realtor, wife is a stay at home mom. His parents gave them a substantial check to put towards a wedding, and they have elected to take the $ and go to Fiji for two weeks - their wedding ceremony will be private.

I am sure we will get a wedding announcement after the fact. What would you give? We are cordial but not close. I attended a different nephew's wedding last year (DH's side of the family) along with our son, and gave the couple, who we know well, $500.

What do you send in response to an announcement from family member if you aren't invited to wedding? I want to acknowledge their special day, but we are not particularly close to them.

We have had several nieces and nephews opt fo4 the Court wedding and/or very very small wedding. We have always sent $250-$500 and a wedding card to them.

[Anonymous]

I sent $200 cash, but circumstances were different. I knew niece was keeping her wedding super small because money was legitimately tight. Adding aunts and uncles plus their spouses would mean at least 30 extra people or hurt feelings by including some but not others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Restaurant gift card
Though I think it would be super tacky to have a wedding after having kids and then not invite anyone but send out an announcement.

np here
To be fair, the couple has not sent out announcements (yet?) OP just assumes they will.

I would not send anything, whether an the couple sends an announcement or not. Even cards are $6+ these days--just to be thrown away...

[Anonymous]

Nothing.

[Anonymous]

Send whatever amount you want, but a gift isn't required if you aren't invited to the wedding.

[Anonymous]

Our niece is getting married in a small private ceremony (nuclear family, parents and siblings only), because fiance is about to be deployed. We will send a check for $500, which is what we spent on nephews wedding last weekend in CA.

It doesn't matter what they choose to do for their wedding, your support should be equal.

[Anonymous]

$500
He is a Nephew.
I give this for graduation gift.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Send a box of wedding invitations.

lol!

thanks!

OP, I would send a card. Nothing else.
They elected not to have a wedding, even given wedding money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our niece is getting married in a small private ceremony (nuclear family, parents and siblings only), because fiance is about to be deployed. We will send a check for $500, which is what we spent on nephews wedding last weekend in CA.

It doesn't matter what they choose to do for their wedding, your support should be equal.

Says who. I would send $1000 to your niece, and $0.00 to OP's nephew.

[Anonymous]

I'd do nothing.