If you grew up lower class and became rich

[Anonymous]

I am surprised at how poorly other rich people tip. And how, in general, they don't realize how little money and how hard it is to live as someone making a blue collar salary. Very limited empathy and awareness of "how the other half lives."

[Anonymous]

It is a lot more lonely being rich. The community support is better at lower incomes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I grew up in bottom 1% (food stamps, free hot lunches, absent father) and moved up to probably top 5% (est. 350k/yr.).
When I was coming up, I actually believed that poor people were poor because they didn't work hard, and that rich people busted their ass*s off to get rich. Hah, was I a fool.
1) The higher one moves up, the easier their job gets because of deference, prestige, etc.
2) 90+% of wealth in America is inherited, no one worked for it (except the dead people who actually built it).

#1 isn’t true either. We’ll, harder is subjective. But the top 10% work on average 46 hours per week as compared to those full time employed bottom 90% who work on average 42 hours per week. Amongst those millionaires who identify as self made they work on average 59 hours per week.

I’m not suggesting that it is a simple as just working more hours. But it is true that those at the top worked many more hours as a whole than those in the middle and bottom.

Agreed!

Many with HHI work long hours (not saying those making $50K aren't as well). My partner is an executive/CEO at smaller company (think 500-1500 employees). They've worked 50-70 hour weeks for 25+ years. They are never truly on vacation or having a full weekend without any work. Some weeks they are putting in 12+ hour days for 5-6 days for events. They make the difficult decisions and have no choice but to put in the hours to make things happen. They've been CEO there for 10+ years, and they have never gotten a pay raise---instead they put the extra $$ into rewarding everyone else. In fact in tough times, they have actually taken a 25% pay cut. And their salary was not bloated to begin with. There are top sales people who make as much if not more than them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised at how poorly other rich people tip. And how, in general, they don't realize how little money and how hard it is to live as someone making a blue collar salary. Very limited empathy and awareness of "how the other half lives."

We always tip very well! A "bad tip for really bad service" is 15% (and it has to be ridiculously bad for me to not tip 20%+). Normally do 20-25%, even for Ubereats/DoorDash/me walking in and picking up takeout.
We want to help keep our local businesses in business.

[Anonymous]

What has surprised me most is that I will spend a lot on my home and travel but very little otherwise. I drive a used car, but it’s nice, spend very little on clothes or jewelry and we don’t eat out very often. We are retired and our investment income is something like $1.5 million a year which is crazy. We’ve always been savers and it’s just part of our DNA. Our biggest annual spending category other than taxes is charitable donations and I feel good about that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised at how poorly other rich people tip. And how, in general, they don't realize how little money and how hard it is to live as someone making a blue collar salary. Very limited empathy and awareness of "how the other half lives."

How do people know what other people tip? I’m wealthy and a bargain shopper and I get my hair cut for $23 but I tip $15 because the woman is very nice. Except at restaurants I always tip in cash such as with an Uber driver. There is only one guy I know who is very wealthy who I can see him as being a cheap tipper.

[Anonymous]

I grew up poor because my mother was a mess and was basically a money hoarder who wouldn't spend what little we had on necessities. Grandparents were rich, though. So I have always been familiar with things like country club culture, appropriate topics of conversation -- I don't know, stuff like that. And I have zero debt because my college and law school were all paid for by grandparents, which is not so common for folks who grow up poor.

The only thing that surprises me really is my own continued inability to spend the money I now have without stress. I tend to feel very stressed about spending, whether it is something big like a new car, or something small like non-drugstore moisturizer. I overthink it all. Sometimes to a bizarre extreme.

[Anonymous]

Another money hoarder here. My personal NW (minus partner's half) is 2M. That's crazy. I live in a small SFH that we've done minimal upgrades. I still buy like I"m poor, investing in a few nice things like a suit, a small set of work clothes and great shoes. comfortable ones.

That's it. The money just sits there. I"m starting to enjoy some self-care things though .That just started when I turned 50, realized I could retire but really like my job. So the money comes, I spend a bit, and hoard the rest.

I need a new car though can can't bring myself to get one. Every day my 12 yr old car tells me it's done and reallyl,, I need to replace. No friend. Die and then we'll talk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Largely the bubble that people can live in. Perhaps it is because I grew up lower income, but in a high education household, I was surrounded by family friends of a fairly broad income spectrum. I've noticed now that my colleagues tend not to know what the average income is for their community (much lower than they think) or what typical salaries look like.

Same here. I am surprised about how people gravitate to other wealthy folks not because they truly like them but because they have the means to share in expensive hobbies....

Same. The entitlement. The comfort with using means to get preferential treatment and access and not being embarrassed about it. And ‘easy come easy go’ attitude about money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Largely the bubble that people can live in. Perhaps it is because I grew up lower income, but in a high education household, I was surrounded by family friends of a fairly broad income spectrum. I've noticed now that my colleagues tend not to know what the average income is for their community (much lower than they think) or what typical salaries look like.

Same here. I am surprised about how people gravitate to other wealthy folks not because they truly like them but because they have the means to share in expensive hobbies....

Same. The entitlement. The comfort with using means to get preferential treatment and access and not being embarrassed about it. And ‘easy come easy go’ attitude about money.

And replacing items before they are worn out and buying items for single use situations or on the fly, without proper research and then wanting to replace them. I do not make rash purchases. I would rather not buy anything than buy a cheap or semi-useless item.

[Anonymous]

I'm most surprised with how much my other "rich" peers are bad with money. They don't plan, they dont think about the future. Sometimes it just seems idiotic. They spend every dollar they have, but they're also not worried. They will also be fine.

It makes me wonder if I waste time worrying instead of investing myself in my work and progressing. I think i hold myself back from a risk perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What surprised you most about being rich? Or what surprised you most about the lives of rich people?

We have combined income of about $360k but net worth (retirement, home, investments) of maybe $3 million (give it take). We are 50. Both grew up poor.

The biggest surprise is how we cannot allow ourselves to spend lavishly wo care to the cost. Wed prob do better if we took some financial risks but have t done that. Our funds have done well out of picking stable investments and luck/timing. We both fear being poor again or not having enough money in the event of a significant health issue (like Alzheimer’s). We both fear our DC not being set up financially as well. No amount of money erases those fears (for us at least).

[Anonymous]

Learning to go to the doctor when sick. When you're really poor and don't have Medicaid your method of treatment for everything is "Ignore it, and hope it goes away. If it doesn't, go to the ER." Learning to go to the doctor when I'd had bronchitis for a week and a half, before it turned into walking pneumonia was a revelation. Getting physical therapy for an ankle injury and winding up with two strong ankles at the end of it was amazing. Healthcare.

[Anonymous]

I’m surprised that anyone thinks “I make hours of business phone calls from my vacation house” = I work harder than poor people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Learning to go to the doctor when sick. When you're really poor and don't have Medicaid your method of treatment for everything is "Ignore it, and hope it goes away. If it doesn't, go to the ER." Learning to go to the doctor when I'd had bronchitis for a week and a half, before it turned into walking pneumonia was a revelation. Getting physical therapy for an ankle injury and winding up with two strong ankles at the end of it was amazing. Healthcare.

Same. I don't think I was ever taken to a doctor by my mother, aside from required vaccines when I was a baby. I too had a cold become bronchitis become pneumonia a few years ago. I finally went to the Minute Clinic after work and the NP said to me "You have pneumonia. We need to treat it. I can't believe you aren't in bed." My doctor ordered physical therapy six weeks ago for a knee thing and I still haven't gone. I think of the cost and get scared even though insurance will fully cover it. It's not rational.