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How to get over awkwardness?
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Anonymous
| Wow, us awkward types should get together since we all have nothing to lose! |
Anonymous
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I feel pretty comfortable in social situations, though truth be told, I only like them in small doses. In those situations, the interactions I usually enjoy the most are with the people who are genuine. And, I certainly don't mind quiet periods. I just don't feel that a fun interaction has to equate to non-stop talking, personally. Especially if you're somewhere with kids; it's nice to just sit back and watch what kids are doing.
OP, what you perceive as being awkward might actually be aspects of your personality that others really enjoy! Be you! |
Anonymous
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I am a totally socially "normal" non-awkward (generally) person, and I have also had a ton of moms just not call back or basically not want to be friends. It just happens. Its like dating, as my single friends tell me. You just have to be persistent sometimes (not persistently calling the same person, just keeping in the game).
Also I love this quote which sometimes helps me overcome general social anxiety: Confidence is a habit that can be developed by acting as if you already had the confidence you desire to have. ~ Brian Tracy Basically, fake it till you make it. SO much easier said than done. But it still gives me comfort sometimes. |
Anonymous
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Another former researcher, but now SAHM.
I know what you mean OP. When I read your post I felt like I was reading about myself. Where are living now? Maybe we should all come together 
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Anonymous
| OP, if you don't mind some advice from someone socially NOT awkward (as in drop me in a palace or a slum and either way I'll go home with a N.B.F., or so my husband complains), I recommend as follows. First, always approach either the person who looks the most lonely and awkard OR the social butterfly. The former will be happy to see you coming, the latter will not care if you barely get a word in edgewise (that would be me.) Second, you don't need to fill every silence. Fine to exchange few sentences, hang out a bit, and then chat some more. Third, remember you don't have to carry 100% of the conversation, so as long as you contribute at least 30-40% that is fine. Fourth, when all else fails, compliment their kid and ask for advice/information that is kid related. And ignore the crabby pants who hate D.C. Lots of nice folks here and if you go into the world expecting good things, then good things will come your way! |
Anonymous
Ha! I was going to say the exact same thing. It is very old school, but it holds a lot of no nonsense truth. |
Anonymous
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Where are all you researcher types? I am jealous because I wanted to get my PhD in physics and never did. I still think about what life would have been like it I stuck it out.
Anyway, you don't have to make friends with everyone. I am sure there are plenty of people out there who would find the things you have to say very interesting. |
Anonymous
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OP, don't worry about being witty or coming up with a clever/intelligent response to someone's question. I notice this a lot with introverts: they pause too long, seeking the optimal response, and meanwhile the first person feels uncertain and uncomfortable. Just smile or nod and look animated. Wit is great but few people have it, and it's conversation, not tennis. Warmth is a good quality to shoot for.
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