Funniest or most embarrassing thing you’ve ever done while asleep

[Anonymous]

How would I know? I was asleep! Just kidding.

On Christmas morning 1997 when I was 14, I was jolted out of a deep slumber by the sound of my mother shrieking in shock, followed by, “Oh honey…I didn’t realize…I’m so sorry!”, followed by a rush of cool air over my whole body. She had come in to wake me up to open presents, was in a very jolly mood, and thought it would be fun to just rip the covers off of us kids that morning. The problem? Not only was I wearing absolutely nothing, but also sleeping on my back in a position that left zero to the imagination.

[Anonymous]

When I was a kid, I was a terrible sleepwalker. One night, I woke up to find my perplexed dad, clad only in underwear, standing in the bathroom that opened to my room. The light was on and he was doing something with the bathtub.

Turns out that I had plugged the tub, started running a bath, and gone back to bed, all while fast asleep. My parents woke up to wet plaster falling from the ceiling of their bedroom, which was located right under the bathroom. My parents were amazingly nice about it—I basically ruined their ceiling.

[Anonymous]

Not me, but a friend bit their spouse's ear while dreaming.

In college, my roommate told me that she was burping a lot at night. I was a sleep, so I didn't notice. Then she said, "I was thinking 'so and so must think I'm so gross...' but then I heard you fart". I laughed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How would I know? I was asleep! Just kidding.

On Christmas morning 1997 when I was 14, I was jolted out of a deep slumber by the sound of my mother shrieking in shock, followed by, “Oh honey…I didn’t realize…I’m so sorry!”, followed by a rush of cool air over my whole body. She had come in to wake me up to open presents, was in a very jolly mood, and thought it would be fun to just rip the covers off of us kids that morning. The problem? Not only was I wearing absolutely nothing, but also sleeping on my back in a position that left zero to the imagination.

I gather that was the last time she ever went into your room while you were asleep.

[Anonymous]

In college I was sharing a bed with a friend on a weekend trip, and I woke up to her trying to push me away with one finger because I was aggressively trying to cuddle with her in my sleep.

I was horrified and pretended to be asleep and rolled away from her, and lay awake in a cold mortified sweat for the rest of the night.

[Anonymous]

I was dreaming that I was eating a big slice of marshmallow shortcake. I opened by mouth wide to take a bite, and awoke to a throbbing finger because in real life I'd just bitten it hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How would I know? I was asleep! Just kidding.

On Christmas morning 1997 when I was 14, I was jolted out of a deep slumber by the sound of my mother shrieking in shock, followed by, “Oh honey…I didn’t realize…I’m so sorry!”, followed by a rush of cool air over my whole body. She had come in to wake me up to open presents, was in a very jolly mood, and thought it would be fun to just rip the covers off of us kids that morning. The problem? Not only was I wearing absolutely nothing, but also sleeping on my back in a position that left zero to the imagination.

I gather that was the last time she ever went into your room while you were asleep.

Not the last time she ever went into my room while I was asleep, but definitely the last time she ever ripped the covers off of me - or any of my siblings - again. From that point on until I went to college and then whenever I came home to visit, she would knock and say, “Are ya decent?” before entering. Not coincidentally, it was also the last Christmas I ever received pajamas as a gift. As mortifying as it was at the time, we still laugh about it almost three decades later, and it’s the reason I will NEVER wake my own children up in that manner.

[Anonymous]

I once rolled over in my sleep and a wrinkle in the sheet caught on my littlest toe and pulled it right out of its socket. Yes I dislocated my toe while asleep.

[Anonymous]

I boinked Bea Arthur in a dream.

[Anonymous]

This is gross, but I once dreamt that I had to go to the bathroom , so in my dream I walked into the bathroom and relieved myself. Thing was, I did have to go, I did start relieving myself, but I wasn’t in the bathroom. I was still in bed. Thankfully that’s only happened once, and it was only number one.

[Anonymous]

I woke up, jumped out of bed, and yelled to my husband to hurry and get out of bed because the ceiling was falling. As soon as the words were out of my mouth I was like never mind and climbed back in bed.

Husband will never live down the time he just silently pulled my pillow out from under my head and took it as his own.

[Anonymous]

When we were in college my now-DH said that while I was sleeping I told him I wanted to sell the blue chair at a yard sale but no one was going to buy it because we’d had sex on it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I boinked Bea Arthur in a dream.

Hot

[Anonymous]

Once I woke up and found that my feet were on my pillow and my head was at the foot of the bed (started out in the normal position).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I was a kid, I was a terrible sleepwalker. One night, I woke up to find my perplexed dad, clad only in underwear, standing in the bathroom that opened to my room. The light was on and he was doing something with the bathtub.

Turns out that I had plugged the tub, started running a bath, and gone back to bed, all while fast asleep. My parents woke up to wet plaster falling from the ceiling of their bedroom, which was located right under the bathroom. My parents were amazingly nice about it—I basically ruined their ceiling.

I did something similar but no damage thankfully. My bedroom was in the main level but I used to shower in my sister’s bathroom upstairs because the main level one didn’t work. I came out of my room one night wrapped in a blanket, greeted my mom, and then walked upstairs to my sister’s room. She thought the tv noise was bothering me so I’d decided to sleep with my sister but eventually noticed the sound of the shower. She came upstairs and found the shower on and me asleep on the bathroom floor. I had no memory of any of it the next day.