Single sex school - more helpful in high school or college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is at a girls' school and I would say it was great until about 10th grade. Then I'd say that she and almost all her friends started wishing they were at a coed school.
-they missed boys. Not only as romantic interests but as friends and classmates.
-girls get really intense and competitive. It's a lot to go through junior year, college admissions, etc with all girls. Boys are just more chill (in general--i have two of both). the girls school environment when all the girls are stressed out can get toxic fast.

In retrospect maybe we would have chosen a woman's college instead. We have a second daughter who is at the girls school and are likely moving her for high school to a coed environment.

I never found my all girls HS to be competitive, intense, etc. Which doesn't mean your kids didn't experience that!

It depends entirely on the individual, her social crowd, and the school. It's possible there were girls at my school who found it intense at the same time my friends and I found it supportive.
But I really dislike the generalizations about how girls "are" or that all-girls environments inevitably get toxic.

yeah, i would have said that too until i saw it play out. Up until 11th grade I was like "hey, that toxic thing is just a annoying stereotype."

It's both because the girls get competitive and because they almost all really have their sh$%t together and school won't give everyone As and not everyone gets into the same colleges, etc. So it leads to a lot of competitive stuff. My son is at an all-boys school and in comparison the boys are just far more laid back. At the boys school you have some academic superstars and some strivers and this and that but they are balanced out by really chill boys as well.
At the girls school they are all intense. It's been surprisingly unpleasant for my daughter and almost all of her friends (per their moms). It's just a LOT of stress and very little reprieve from it.
Your mileage may certainly vary--by school, by grade, by friend group. I will say that my daughter is generally super chill but she really feels that she can't escape from those who aren't.

[Anonymous]

I thought an all-girls HS was the perfect experience for me. It created a great environment during formative years, but then the coed college allowed for more growth in adulthood. My goal is to have my DD attend an all-girls hs.

[Anonymous]

Vote for single sex HS and co-ed college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD was at a co-ed school for K-8. She is now at an all girls school. We have all agreed that she will attend a Co-ed college to prepare her for the real world where she will (most likely) be working closely with men. Not to mention the social benefits of co-Ed. But she loves her all girls education and I think it is really beneficial for specifically these teen years for her to be in this environment and develop confidence and leadership abilities. She really appreciates the tenor of the classroom and is able to concentrate much better than her previous co-ed school.

I started considering all girls schools when I read an interesting study on how 66% of the interruptions on the Supreme Court were directed at the three women Justices. https://www.glamour.com/story/how-frequently-women-supreme-court-justices-are-interrupted-by-men That really spoke to me, as it involves highly educated people who are very respectful and civil. And I just thought…I want my DD to experience something different.

I attended an all female high school and a co-ed college and agree that each was beneficial for the reasons mentioned.

[Anonymous]

I went to all girls k-12. Yes, 12 years of it! Some things are wonderful but some major negatives as well. We grew up very outspoken and confident. We were bonded to one another as friends for life. We were never afraid to speak up in front of classmates or even challenge outsiders, male or female. Once we got to college, though, we had no clue how to handle boys in any way. We had to learn how to interact with them, relearn how to have confidence in front of males. Some of us fell down and others were successful. It can be a great experience. I think the pluses outweigh the minuses. There is your whole life to deal with men.

[Anonymous]

Relative (boy) found an all-boys HS let him focus with fewer distractions, but happy went to a coed university (where he found his wife and got his degree).

Different kids are different. Different schools are different. YMMV

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does an all-female or all-male education provide more benefit in high school or college, assuming you can choose only one? Not sure if people have studied this or have anecdotal thoughts?

highschool not college for sure

[Anonymous]

How many single sex colleges are there really for males???

All that’s coming to mind is Morehouse, an HBCU

[Anonymous]

My son attends an all boy HS in DC. For many many reasons, it's been perfect for him; the sports are competitive and he works hard plays hard. No girl distractions, he focuses on academics and his sport. Best decision we made.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How many single sex colleges are there really for males???

All that’s coming to mind is Morehouse, an HBCU

Five, plus lots of religious vocational schools like seminaries and yeshivas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does an all-female or all-male education provide more benefit in high school or college, assuming you can choose only one? Not sure if people have studied this or have anecdotal thoughts?

highschool not college for sure

No "for sure"; many women find great value in attending women's colleges. You can't blanket dismiss them out of hand like that.