People pleaser DH and his family at Thanksgiving?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Make you" carry on conversation?

Nope, you can bring a magazine or a book and hang out and only engage in as much conversation as you want. If it's awkward, that's on him.

"I'm willing to go with you if you want to go, but I will not be listening to any complaining in the car on the way there or back, because you are choosing this. I will also not be carrying on conversation while you sulk; you are choosing this. If you complain to me in the car, or sulk and expect me to carry on conversation at your parents' house, I will never accompany you to a family function again. Choose wisely, because I mean every word."

+10000
Dealing with this is about setting boundaries NOW and calling out his behavior leading up to it. He doesn’t get to be a victim here and make everyone else miserable.

Neither does OP. She can choose not to go. If she goes, it's on her.

Get serious. Are you suggesting just OP not go and make it even more awkward? "Where's your wife?" And then the tension between OP and her DH? This is a ridiculous POV.

Moreover, there is nothing in OPs post suggesting she's at fault for making anyone miserable. She's trying to cope and support her DH.

You win the dumbest post of the day award.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Make you" carry on conversation?

Nope, you can bring a magazine or a book and hang out and only engage in as much conversation as you want. If it's awkward, that's on him.

"I'm willing to go with you if you want to go, but I will not be listening to any complaining in the car on the way there or back, because you are choosing this. I will also not be carrying on conversation while you sulk; you are choosing this. If you complain to me in the car, or sulk and expect me to carry on conversation at your parents' house, I will never accompany you to a family function again. Choose wisely, because I mean every word."

+10000
Dealing with this is about setting boundaries NOW and calling out his behavior leading up to it. He doesn’t get to be a victim here and make everyone else miserable.

Neither does OP. She can choose not to go. If she goes, it's on her.

Get serious. Are you suggesting just OP not go and make it even more awkward? "Where's your wife?" And then the tension between OP and her DH? This is a ridiculous POV.

Moreover, there is nothing in OPs post suggesting she's at fault for making anyone miserable. She's trying to cope and support her DH.

You win the dumbest post of the day award.

NP. I see no problem with skipping what you know is going to be a fraught, awkward and tense environment because all involved are immature. If anyone asked “where’s your wife,” the husband would be free to say, “I’m acting like a jerk about not wanting to be here but insisting on being here anyway, so she told me she’s staying home to avoid the s-show we all know this is going to be.”