The McLean School: ASD kids need not apply
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Anonymous
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OP stop saying mild autism. It’s ableist. And wrong.
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Anonymous
| PP: how is it abelist and wrong? Some kids with autism are nonverbal and cannot attend school. Other kids can attend mainstream schools without any support. And kids fall anywhere in between. When you get an autism diagnosis, it's literally measured on a numerical system. It's called Autism SPECTRUM Disorder. The accommodations recommended for ASD kids are largely based on that measure. Do you really think a kid who can function in a mainstream school is the same as a kid who can't speak, wears diapers, and requires a caregiver? They are all the same? We measure intelligence on a scale. Is that ableist? We measure executive functioning skills on a scale, too. Is any measure ableist? When I say "high-functioning," I'm referring to a kid at the end of the spectrum who needs little to no supports. Honestly, that's like saying that describing someone as having a "stage" of cancer is wrong because anyone who has cancer just has cancer. |
Anonymous
Nothing about autism is mild though realistically speaking. Even “high functioning” autism still impacts an individual’s life on a daily basis. It still requires hours upon hours of interventions, constant hard work from the individual with autism, nothing high functioning or mild about it. I don’t mind the term personally and don’t think it’s ableist but never forget the fact that high functioning or mild or level 1 autism is anything but difficult. Sure it’s a different set of challenges than level 2 or 3 or other disabilities but the challenges are real and often debilitating even if others consider it mild. |
Anonymous
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I have a kid at McLean with pretty severe (but decently well controlled w/ medication) ADHD, anxiety, and dyslexia. Kiddo has (and has had) classmates with ASD. I wasn’t at the Open House but here’s my guess:
1. McLean has struggled for a few years figuring out who they want to be when they grow up. The beat is that they are trying to move a bit more “mainstream” and are therefore counseling out kids with more significant social or academic gaps (more than 2 years below grade level—which doesn’t sound like your child) 2. Based on the above & feedback from parents, I think they are being more clear about the population they serve I think that a few kiddos with more significant social or emotional needs have been admitted in the past few years—which both alienated the more mainstream-leaning families AND didn’t provide an ideal environment for kids with greater needs. All that said, I wouldn’t give up on the school if you think it’s a good all-around fit. |
Anonymous
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There is no way I would apply to a school that stated clearly at an open house that they do not want my child. I would not want my child to have to spend every day at school feeling like they had to apologize for being who they are. That’s bs.
Agree McLean should state this on their website as clearly as they did at the event. We got this word through the grapevine a few years ago when we were looking for HS for our student with ASD and didn’t even apply to McLean. Our student is attending a mainstream private with absolutely no academic or other school supports and doing well. They still have social challenges but don’t require hours and hours of interventions and aren’t debilitated. |
Anonymous
OP, we had a kid at McLean School well over a decade ago. It has never taken kids on the spectrum. Here's what it says. https://www.mcleanschool.org/academics/. Where does it say "ASD"? You should have picked up the phone and called. |
Anonymous
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to wit:"Our Abilities Model® starts with gifts and helps all students — conventional learners as well as those with challenges such as dyslexia, anxiety, and ADHD, or organizational challenges".
That is not on the spectrum. |
Anonymous
Did you miss the PP who stated their McLean student has classmates with ASD? |
Anonymous
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A private school has a right to serve a certain segment of the population as long as it doesn’t discriminate.
Just based on what you report the school doesn’t say - we don’t accept students with autism so don’t apply. They said “ But the co-head of school said that the school does not serve ASD kids well”. You need to focus on the “well” So why are you so upset? If your child doesn’t have many characteristics of autism at school then the school might in fact accept your child because the school might serve them well. Not all private schools can be everything to everyone. |
Anonymous
NP. I have a DC with ASD (mild, sorry not sorry), who is on/above grade level, and some some executive functioning and organizational challenges. I would read the above and think it would be a good fit for my DC - until they say out loud that they do not take kids with ASD. Okay, then, no. We would walk out then too. |
Anonymous
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I am disgusted. You'd think the co-head of school would have a bit more intelligence and class to not categorically dismiss a whole group of kids in a public statement.
I'm sure this won't make you feel better OP but this school is only good for a specific type of kid. They make kids who are not that bright seem bright by lowering the standards. It works for kids who feel stupid because they can't cut it in a mainstream environment by building up their self esteem but it doesn't really provide the support you'd think the do. It's a trick in some ways because they are not achieving more. They are just changing the goal posts but I do think this service is valuable to some kids. |
Anonymous
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This co-head is an interim and is only there until the new head comes next summer. From my understanding, no one is happy about the co-head situation at the school.
I have no idea why she was speaking for the admissions director but please know that there are students at McLean with autism in their profile. |
Anonymous
My child is at a different school far away with a very similar profile to McLean. The past few years have a time of a lot of change in our student body. At some point just before the pandemic our K-8 school became known of being quietly good at accommodating neurodiversity. Unfortunately this was true for the then 2-3 neurodiverse students in each grade but it wasn’t scalable. As more families with kids with higher (and often undeclared) needs sought the school out during and after the pandemic, it didn’t have the resources for grades with 25% of students needing accommodations. Families of typical learners got mad because they sensed- possibly inaccurately- that resources were disproportionally going to neurodiverse students. By late elementary/middle school, there are now a lot of kids applying out to 5-12 and 6-12 schools because of socially imbalanced grades. When you have a grade of 35 kids and 5 kids of each gender are missing social cues or not interacting in the same way as others, middle school spidey sense is activated. Kids know, and middle school kids aren’t as kind or patient towards their different classmates as they were in 1st grade. Our head of school hasn’t yet stood up and say “we can’t accommodate kids with autism” but that is probably the next step in terms of managing enrollment, retention, and resources. It’s a nasty thing to do at an open house that includes students, though. I’m sorry, OP. |
Anonymous
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To be clear: I am not upset that they do not take ASD kids. I do not think a school should be all things to all kids.
What I think is that if the school is categorically going to deny ASD kids, they could say so on their website or in the marketing materials--not in front of prospective students, like my DC. How do you think it feels to a 13 year old to have the director of a school expressly say, I've never met you, and I don't know anything about you, but you won't do well here because of who you are. ??? FWIW: my daughter fits the profile. She is above-average intelligence (very, very gifted verbally), has excellent grades, strong teacher recommendations and ADHD. Given that, why would I pick up the phone? You seem to assume that ASD kids will NOT be accepted to private schools, unless exceptions are made, and there is no basis for that assumption. Look through the posts in this string, and throughout DCUM. Lots and lots of ASD kids attend mainstream private schools. If you categorically do not want ASD kids, why wait until the open house to come out and say it? And if it should have been clear from the website, why say it at the open house? |
Anonymous
| 16:15. Thanks for the feedback. If you don't mind my asking, is it Commonwealth? |