Friend has violent Pitbull but wants to hist Girls Nite at her house

[Anonymous]

Call your least gossipy friend in the group and explain. See if she is willing to back you suggesting a restaurant

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I want to see my friends but am terrified of her dog (pitbull). Her dog failed socialization training, and has already viciously attacked two small puppies in recent years. Those attacks left one puppy with a crushed skull and the other puppy with broken legs. Her dog is so poorly socialized that she had to stop taking it on walks at the local parks, bc it would try to attack other dogs. And her dog is huge! And strong!

I’ve been to her house before and the dog jumps on you and barks and runs fast around the house. My friend just laughs this off and ignores this terrible behavior by her dog. I find it terrifying and have not been over there since.

Our friend group is coordinating a holiday gathering, which I was fine doing at a restaurant like we’ve been doing. But my dog friend said she’ll host it, and the other ladies said that’s fine. The other ladies are not aware of the attacks or the failed training, and some of them have never been to her house or dealt with this dog.

My friend has fragile feelings so I’m trying to determine the best way to approach this. Options:

1 ) I do not want to go to her house, unless she is willing to put the dog away in the basement or a bedroom while we’re there. I think my friend will be offended by this option, but I feel this is the best compromise to ensure everyone’s safety.

2) I can just not go at all, which I’m fine with but the friend group has said they really want all of us there and have worked hard to coordinate schedules, even delaying by a month bc I was unable to make the first date suggested. So I feel obligated to attend now.

3) I really wish that either someone else would host it, or better yet we just go to a restaurant. I suggested the restaurant to start with, which everyone was fine with until dog friend offered to host at her house. So backtracking to the restaurant idea would be kind of awkward at this point, and my friend would likely feel offended.

4) I can take my Zoloft and just go to her house, terrified as hell and hope for the best. Do some shots while there to calm my nerves. This is my least preferred option, and tbh is not something I’m fully committed to doing. I do not want to be attacked or jumped on by her dog.

What would you do?

Troll. You take Zoloft every day, not on a one off basis.

Unfortunately this is not a troll tell. Many people take meds incorrectly or not as directed. Combo that with take a Zoloft + shots.

[Anonymous]

Just tell her you’re scared of her dog, which you are, and will only be able to make it if the dog is secured. I honestly don’t understand why telling her that is a big deal.

[Anonymous]

I was once attacked in a friend's kitchen by her poorly-trained dog who entered the kitchen, didn't recognize me, and came at me with 80 lbs of muscle and teeth bared. It was really scary.

I would not go to the home of someone with a poorly trained dog and a history of attacks, and I'd be up front about my reasons why even if they were sensitive. You don't have to make it an accusation or a criticism. Just tell the friend you don't feel comfortable around the dog and ask if the event could be moved to a place without a dog. You don't even have to make it about this specific dog.

She might offer to lock the dog up or keep it outside during the party, and you can decide for yourself if that's an acceptable solution. I'd actually be a bit worried about this being unkind to the dog (it's not his fault his owner has failed to properly socialize him), or I'd worry that the dog would whine and cry and then halfway through the evening she'd let him come hang out and then you're in a real pickle. So I'd ask to move the location.

BTW, she probably wants to host specifically because her dog is untrained and she's afraid to leave him alone for any length of time.

[Anonymous]

I’d tell her. Tell her you really want to come but you are scared if the dog, understand if she doesn’t want to put the dog away but you can’t come if she doesn’t and hope she understands.

[Anonymous]

My high school best friend married DH's lifelong best friend and they have TWO dogs exactly like this. They live within walking distance from our shame but there's no way we can go over there as we have little kids. We tried once and DH and I were both bleeding within 5 mins from protecting our kids from being knocked down. One dog scratched my hand so deep while jumping up aggressively near one of my kids so I put my hand up over her and the other dog straight up bit the back of DH's ankle. We left right away.

One of their dogs bit a little kid walking a little dog (bit both the kid and the dog) in Sept and they're facing legal consequences now.

[Anonymous]

Do you really want to deal with a dog bite right before Christmas?

[Anonymous]

I always let people know I have a large dog (friendly and non-pit btw) before they come over the first time or drop their kid for a play date and ask how they are with dogs and if they’d prefer I keep him away in the bedroom. A lot of people like dogs (or have met him before) and say they’re fine with him hanging around (he runs to the door to greet people, but doesn’t jump and then settles). Even still I am 100% open to putting him in a bedroom if someone isn’t comfortable. As a host, I want people to enjoy being at my home.

Your friend sounds like she has her head in the sand about her dog and doesn’t think it’s a problem. I’d be honest and then not go if she won’t put him away. I’d consider giving the other girls a heads up to b/c I’d be really upset to show up somewhere with an aggressive pit. I hate these dogs.

[Anonymous]

I would be kind but honest and leave it at that.

Hi Marla. I’m really sorry, but I’ve given it a lot of thought, and I don’t feel comfortable going to the party with Fido at the house. I realize you are not concerned about her doing anything unsafe, but I am, and am going to have too much worry to enjoy the evening. If you’re willing to move it back to a restaurant, I’ll happily attend, but if not I wish you all a lovely evening and will connect at the next event.

If she pushes back, stay strong and simple. “I’m sorry, that just won’t work for me, but have fun!” And you can tell your other friends the same thing.

[Anonymous]

I've been attacked by a pitbull so I would not hesitate to ask her to lock up dog, but honestly I probably wouldn't even go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I want to see my friends but am terrified of her dog (pitbull). Her dog failed socialization training, and has already viciously attacked two small puppies in recent years. Those attacks left one puppy with a crushed skull and the other puppy with broken legs. Her dog is so poorly socialized that she had to stop taking it on walks at the local parks, bc it would try to attack other dogs. And her dog is huge! And strong!

I’ve been to her house before and the dog jumps on you and barks and runs fast around the house. My friend just laughs this off and ignores this terrible behavior by her dog. I find it terrifying and have not been over there since.

Our friend group is coordinating a holiday gathering, which I was fine doing at a restaurant like we’ve been doing. But my dog friend said she’ll host it, and the other ladies said that’s fine. The other ladies are not aware of the attacks or the failed training, and some of them have never been to her house or dealt with this dog.

My friend has fragile feelings so I’m trying to determine the best way to approach this. Options:

1 ) I do not want to go to her house, unless she is willing to put the dog away in the basement or a bedroom while we’re there. I think my friend will be offended by this option, but I feel this is the best compromise to ensure everyone’s safety.

2) I can just not go at all, which I’m fine with but the friend group has said they really want all of us there and have worked hard to coordinate schedules, even delaying by a month bc I was unable to make the first date suggested. So I feel obligated to attend now.

3) I really wish that either someone else would host it, or better yet we just go to a restaurant. I suggested the restaurant to start with, which everyone was fine with until dog friend offered to host at her house. So backtracking to the restaurant idea would be kind of awkward at this point, and my friend would likely feel offended.

4) I can take my Zoloft and just go to her house, terrified as hell and hope for the best. Do some shots while there to calm my nerves. This is my least preferred option, and tbh is not something I’m fully committed to doing. I do not want to be attacked or jumped on by her dog.

What would you do?

Troll. You take Zoloft every day, not on a one off basis.

Unfortunately this is not a troll tell. Many people take meds incorrectly or not as directed. Combo that with take a Zoloft + shots.

Oh, it's totally a troll tell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been attacked by a pitbull so I would not hesitate to ask her to lock up dog, but honestly I probably wouldn't even go.

Would be better to give the dog Zoloft.

Why has this vicious beast not been put down after attacking and severely injuring two puppies ?

[Anonymous]

Screw her "fragile feelings". Be straight up with her, period.

[Anonymous]

1. You politely decline the invitation.

2. If the host's dog has really and truly crushed a puppy's skull and broken another's legs (serious allegations, so please make sure they're factually true and not exaggerations), then it's your duty to warn the other guests. "Failing socialization training" can mean many things, so best not to mention it.

[Anonymous]

Would you rather be mauled than stand up to your friend?