Would you move to NYC with a household income of 350 to 400K?

[Anonymous]

"I'm just wondering if anyone else has moved to their desired city and significantly downsized in order to do so. Did you regret your decision? "

We are moving to Honolulu and will be downsizing from our place in DC. Not sure if we will regret it...hopefully not!!

[Anonymous]

I wonder about this all the time. I grew up in a NYC burb and all of my close family and friends are in the city or surrounding areas. I really just love New York in general, and I'm constantly hoping an opportunity will come up that will allow us to move. I like DC, but it's just a totally different vibe and can't compete in terms of culture, character, restaurants, etc. That being said, I am spoiled now by living in a good-sized house with a decent yard, but still being in an urban area, and I don't know if I could adjust to living in a much smaller apartment. With our HHI of $350K here, we are comfortable but by no means living in the lap of luxury. I think I would probably need double that to be happy in NYC, sadly. Maybe a bit less if we ended up in Brooklyn, which would be a good possibility, but even there you're looking at $1 million for a decent home plus higher costs for daycare, groceries, etc., so I'd want to be making in the $500-600K range to feel comfortable.

[Anonymous]

OP- Where do you live now and how long have you lived there? I've lived in several different areas of this city and didn't really find a "community" until we moved to Chevy Chase, DC. Even then, it took about a year to really feel like I had a good network of friends. I'm not necessarily saying this would be the best neighborhood for you, but am suggesting that if you don't like where you're living now, you'd probably be happier elsewhere. I also think it's easier to make friends once your kids are in school and sports than when your kids are young.

Personally, I wouldn't be happy trying to live in NYC on that income since we *struggle* to make it on $350K here (before the flaming starts, we don't really struggle, it's just that it doesn't seem to get you as far as you'd hope). However, if you're always going to regret not moving back, then maybe you should give it a try. You could always move again if you weren't happy. But before deciding to move, you should realize that you're probably idealizing how your life there would be. Your friendships wouldn't be exactly the same as before since once you (and presumably, your friends) have kids, friendships change and people have less time to socialize and priorities change.

[Anonymous]

I could not live on that income in NYC. In DC, yes - because it affords you a relatively comfortable life. In NY, everything is more expensive and I would just feel like I wasn't getting ahead. This sounds terrible, but I think I would need to make at least 1mil to comfortably live in NYC with kids/family. Part of that, however, depends on your priorities. For me, I place a big value on our home/space - I love having a nice sized house and a nice sized yard in walking distance to most things I need. I also love hanging out at home and having friends/relatives over to our house/entertaining, etc. I simply would not feel comfortable living in a two-bedroom condo with children for the indefinite future. Some people like that lifestyle but I just couldn't handle it.

[Anonymous]

We did not find too much of a community feel here in DC until after our DD was born and since then it has been easier to make connections with people that are not about work or politics or ambition. Even more since our daughter started school - at local private school. Now we see her friends from school at the park, at the swimming pool, music classes, summer camps, etc. It is wonderful for her and had also been nice for us as we have gotten to know some parents very well and become friends. Other we are friendly with but not necessarily friends but it is very nice to bump into someone you know and exchange greetings in random places. By staying in DC you will have money for private school (if you want), extra lessons, pool memberships, etc. and can be part of a community.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have visited NYC with my kids a lot after having lived there for many years. I think it would be a really hard place to live with children. I went to the playground and it was entirely nannies, and a lot of them. Spend some time on the Urbanbaby boards and you get a sense of the incredible expense, the pressure to get into "good" preschools, how difficult and expensive it is just to do grocery shopping (add up all those Fresh Direct deliveries). You will spend the large majority of your income on your condo and childcare and won't have much left over to go to dinner, etc. with your friends. I think NYC can be a great place to live if you have a lot of money. Frankly, we make $350-300K here in DC and we aren't living large at all.

OP here. How have you adjusted to living in DC? I do agree about the difficulty of living in NYC with young children. I think I've just gotten lucky that the last several times I've visited NY the weather has been perfect, subways were running fine, and there were so many great activities for the entire family. I do wonder what people do when the weather is crappy. At least in DC when it is too hot or cold, you don't have to take the subway--there is always the option to drive to an indoor activity. I do think that I'm idealizing what it would be like to live in NYC perhaps because I'm not entirely happy with my social life here. We don't have to make this move anytime soon. So for now I'm going to work on rectifying the things I don't like about DC (building more of a social network). I also don't love the neighborhood I'm in now so we are exploring different neighborhoods and that might make a huge difference in our quality of life.

It took a little while to adjust to living in DC. It seemed a little boring at first and no decent food delivery! But now that my children are in school we have developed a great social circle and I really love my new friends. We have an active social life now and there is always something to do. I do love my neighborhood -- Chevy Chase, DC -- so that probably makes a big difference. I love going back to visit NYC, but I have no desire to live there anymore.

[Anonymous]

"It took a little while to adjust to living in DC. It seemed a little boring at first "

Deadly dull is more like it.

[Anonymous]

PP here. I don't think it's deadly dull at all. I think when you live in NYC you get used to a very fast-paced lifestyle, which isn't necessarily a better lifestyle. Slowing down a little is an adjustment. But DC is hardly slow paced compared to many other parts of the country. It took us a little while -- and particularly, our children going to preschool where we met similarly-situated friends -- for us to settle in to the rhythms of life here in DC. Now I love it and find NYC too crowded and chaotic.

[Anonymous]

A lot of people find that their married, with children social scene is not as strong as the young single life they left behind. So be sure it is the city and not your life change.