Tell me about your child's HS experience with balancing classes, sports, and friends

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not OP but is there something odd about autistic kids playing lacrosse? I only ask because I suspect my daughter is autistic and we have a neurospych scheduled. She has played lacrosse since she was 5. Does that somehow suggest she may not be autistic?

On the girls side it wouldn't surprise me. Given the amount of contact and brutality on the boys side, that surprises me

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks everyone for the advice. I guess I can stop worrying. He has his friends in class and sports. I also like the idea of doing easy electives next year. PE will open up that slot for 2 besides Spanish.

As for lacrosse, he seems to enjoy it. His sensory issues deal with brightness/lights, sounds, food textures and taste, but he's never complained about the contact and brutality of lacrosse. Basketball has a lot of contact too, but in a different way. Tons of contact (even if there shouldn't be and it's called, it still happens a lot).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not OP but is there something odd about autistic kids playing lacrosse? I only ask because I suspect my daughter is autistic and we have a neurospych scheduled. She has played lacrosse since she was 5. Does that somehow suggest she may not be autistic?

On the girls side it wouldn't surprise me. Given the amount of contact and brutality on the boys side, that surprises me

NP, I have a girl with autism, they also struggle with team sports (group activities) and having more than 2-3 close friends. But they call it a spectrum for a reason….

I was actually more surprised that the OP had a student with autism who doesn’t already have depression and anxiety. We have to be careful with those autistic people pleasers they hide A LOT of emotions! I have one myself.

[Anonymous]

3 sports? I'd drop smth. My DS has ASD/ADHD, he is taking only a few honors and is in one year long sport plus 2-3 clubs. Your DS is overworked, OP. Balance it out already.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid has no homework and doesn’t do high school sports. They just sit at home every day after school.

I had a little homework and no sports, but didn't just sit around. All of his friends are in sports? No kids ever just hang out on their own anymore?? That's sad to me.

I see large groups of kids just hanging around town and going from store to store or walking the sidewalks and going to large parties all the time. There are definitely kids who do this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:3 sports? I'd drop smth. My DS has ASD/ADHD, he is taking only a few honors and is in one year long sport plus 2-3 clubs. Your DS is overworked, OP. Balance it out already.

Not OP, but a mom with a kid who plays 3 different sports. What is the difference between 3 different season sports and one year long sport? I think her kid plays 1 sport in fall, winter, spring, as mine does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for the advice. I guess I can stop worrying. He has his friends in class and sports. I also like the idea of doing easy electives next year. PE will open up that slot for 2 besides Spanish.

As for lacrosse, he seems to enjoy it. His sensory issues deal with brightness/lights, sounds, food textures and taste, but he's never complained about the contact and brutality of lacrosse. Basketball has a lot of contact too, but in a different way. Tons of contact (even if there shouldn't be and it's called, it still happens a lot).

Some kids on the autism spectrum crave more physical contact--they may be over-sensitive to light/sound/texture/taste but under-sensitive to physical content. Not uncommon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for the advice. I guess I can stop worrying. He has his friends in class and sports. I also like the idea of doing easy electives next year. PE will open up that slot for 2 besides Spanish.

As for lacrosse, he seems to enjoy it. His sensory issues deal with brightness/lights, sounds, food textures and taste, but he's never complained about the contact and brutality of lacrosse. Basketball has a lot of contact too, but in a different way. Tons of contact (even if there shouldn't be and it's called, it still happens a lot).

Some kids on the autism spectrum crave more physical contact--they may be over-sensitive to light/sound/texture/taste but under-sensitive to physical content. Not uncommon.

Sure. But what about the lax bro culture? Seems like most FCPS lax teams would not be incredibly accommodating to autistic kids and their social disabilities/issues.

[Anonymous]

For better, or worse, the experience you describe is pretty consistent with everything I see and hear among my NT high schooler and her friends.

M-F most are out the door by 7:30, if not before, to catch the bus and don't get home until 7, 8, 9pm or later. They are all involved in sports or other equally time-consuming activities, taking demanding course loads and involved with service-oriented organizations that also place demands on their time. If DD's not busy with her own rehearsal, practice or game, she's supporting her friends, working on a fundraiser, volunteering, etc. It feels like a constant whirlwind that to me, as an introverted adult, feels exhausting!

She tries to get to bed before 10 so that leaves very little time for much else other than eating, showering and getting ready for the day ahead. Weekends can be equally as busy, but are generally a mix of sports/activities, studying and socializing. Her core friend group comes from her classes and her extra circulars, so nearly everything she does has a social component.

DD's happy, but stressed out more than I'd like her to be. Her life is definitely busier and more structured than mine was at that age, but that does seem to be the norm of high achieving kids today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For better, or worse, the experience you describe is pretty consistent with everything I see and hear among my NT high schooler and her friends.

M-F most are out the door by 7:30, if not before, to catch the bus and don't get home until 7, 8, 9pm or later. They are all involved in sports or other equally time-consuming activities, taking demanding course loads and involved with service-oriented organizations that also place demands on their time. If DD's not busy with her own rehearsal, practice or game, she's supporting her friends, working on a fundraiser, volunteering, etc. It feels like a constant whirlwind that to me, as an introverted adult, feels exhausting!

She tries to get to bed before 10 so that leaves very little time for much else other than eating, showering and getting ready for the day ahead. Weekends can be equally as busy, but are generally a mix of sports/activities, studying and socializing. Her core friend group comes from her classes and her extra circulars, so nearly everything she does has a social component.

DD's happy, but stressed out more than I'd like her to be. Her life is definitely busier and more structured than mine was at that age, but that does seem to be the norm of high achieving kids today.

But your child is socializing. OP makes it sound like her kid is home in the dark with his head in the books when he's not at school or a game.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for the advice. I guess I can stop worrying. He has his friends in class and sports. I also like the idea of doing easy electives next year. PE will open up that slot for 2 besides Spanish.

As for lacrosse, he seems to enjoy it. His sensory issues deal with brightness/lights, sounds, food textures and taste, but he's never complained about the contact and brutality of lacrosse. Basketball has a lot of contact too, but in a different way. Tons of contact (even if there shouldn't be and it's called, it still happens a lot).

Some kids on the autism spectrum crave more physical contact--they may be over-sensitive to light/sound/texture/taste but under-sensitive to physical content. Not uncommon.

Sure. But what about the lax bro culture? Seems like most FCPS lax teams would not be incredibly accommodating to autistic kids and their social disabilities/issues.

I don't know anything about the boy in question and if he is any good or not, but you'd be surprised how accommodating people are to those on their team who can play - autistic or not.

[Anonymous]

^ Same poster. I hit send too soon.

OP said her son played Varsity as a freshman. I suspect he is talented. So they will accommodate him.