Tell me about your child's HS experience with balancing classes, sports, and friends
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Anonymous
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I'm concerned about my son's high school experience. He's at a middle-tier FCPS high school, was in AAP from 3-8th grade, and has ADHD and autism. He has a 504 and is on medication. Freshman year, he had all honors courses, Spanish 1, and 3 sports. It was challenging but he ended with all As, though barely. Now in 10th grade, it's even tougher with 2 AP classes, honors courses, and frequent tests. He's always studying, even at meets, and rarely has time for friends. I hear him turn down friends to study. It's stressful for both of us.
I did not have any say in his course selection. He chose them on his own. My question – is this normal or is he just not as efficient as other HS kids? His friends take honors and/or AP classes and make excellent grades, but also seem to have a life. I hate how much he devotes to studying (never thought I’d say those words). Will this only get worse in 11th because 10th is worse than 9th was. Any tips for my son and me? |
Anonymous
| What 3 sports? All through the school? |
Anonymous
yes, all sports through the school. He did XC, basketball, and lacrosse. XC and Lacrosse were Varsity, basketball was the freshman team. |
Anonymous
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Is he happy? Does he want to see friends more? I hear AP history in 10th grade is no joke. I guess it is what it is if he wants to take those classes and get As.
My 9th grader is in Alg 2 and see friends, does activities, and seems to study less but have barely any free time all of a sudden. He is doing school / activities / friends / studying. Probably in that order! |
Anonymous
| I asked if he was happy and he said "yes." But he's also my people pleaser child so I wonder if he is or just telling me so, so I won't worry. |
Anonymous
| Not OP but I could have written this. HS is so much more intense than when I went. My kid's head is always in a book. She has 3 AP classes this year in 10th and I feel it was a mistake. She tells me her friend time is at sport practice. I gues . . . |
Anonymous
| With 3 sports, those are his friends and friend time |
Anonymous
| My kid has no homework and doesn’t do high school sports. They just sit at home every day after school. |
Anonymous
AP World does suck up a lot of their time. Also, my 10th grader who did well in math her whole life and especially in Alg 2 HN (ended with a 99.4% as her grade) is STRUGGLING in AP Precalc. She has a B+ (barely). She also is taking AP World and AP Statistics. She has high As in those classes but it's a lot of work for all her classes. Even honors Chemistry keeps her up late at night. I think that's just how HS is if you want to make good grades and you're not a super genius (my kid is not). She plays 2 Varsity sports, tutors kids, and works PT. She texts her friends but doesn't do much with them outside of school. She did do homecoming with friends but spent the whole day pre-homecoming, studying. |
Anonymous
I had a little homework and no sports, but didn't just sit around. All of his friends are in sports? No kids ever just hang out on their own anymore?? That's sad to me. |
Anonymous
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It sounds like he’s a very hard worker and self-motivated in sports and academics. These are wonderful character attributes that many parents of high school boys only dream of.
He might not need a ton of social time and get most of that through sports and classes. |
Anonymous
+1 Especially for kids on the autism spectrum, they often prefer friend time to be kind of structured. |
Anonymous
He is autistic and plays lacrosse? And he has friends and is a people pleaser? That is amazing to me. My son with HFA has plenty of time to balance his classes and his ECs. But, he only has aquaintances at school rather than real friends, so he never spends time hanging out with anyone. I would recommend that he choose easier electives for junior year. Keep the AP courses, but then take sports medicine, or choir, or accounting, or sports psychology, or something that will be a relatively easy A for him. |
Anonymous
| Not OP but is there something odd about autistic kids playing lacrosse? I only ask because I suspect my daughter is autistic and we have a neurospych scheduled. She has played lacrosse since she was 5. Does that somehow suggest she may not be autistic? |
Anonymous
| Friends where from sports. Closest friends where from sports and in the same classes |