Curfew- strict rule or a little flexible

[Anonymous]

The curfew isn’t for them. It’s for me. I need my sleep.

[Anonymous]

Any time is fine as long as they let me know. Even significantly after curfew if there is a good reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The curfew isn’t for them. It’s for me. I need my sleep.

Once my kids drove they technically had a curfew but I was asleep by the time they got in so in reality they didn't. They were generally home on time.

[Anonymous]

If a kid is smart they come in well before curfew every time. Good plan because if they need to call and explain why they will be late, it's then a reasonable ask.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They have a phone. If they’re going to be late they should call.

This.

And mostly because I stay up until my kid is back under our roof.

[Anonymous]

Mine don't have a strict one-size-fits-all curfew. We discuss where they're going, with whom, etc. Based on that we pick a reasonable time to be home. If they are running behind I expect a call prior to the time we set along with an explanation. If the explanation isn't good enough, we'll be discussing it in the morning and it might impact the next outing. (Hasn't really come up yet, hence the might)

[Anonymous]

Depends on the kid. I never had a curfew and my younger sibling did. My boy didn't have one (was responsible and always told me where he was and what his plans were), where as sneaky dd did not communicate plans with us, and did have a curfew

[Anonymous]

I tell mine what time they have to leave to get home rather than what time to be home. I used to work in a rehab center and we always had way too many kids who lost their future because of rushing to beat curfew. And with tracking, it’s so easy to ensure compliance and notification of delay. I never want to be that mom who lives her life wishing she hadn’t had a strict curfew.

[Anonymous]

No curfew, but time allowed out is based on activity, company, location, and transportation.

[Anonymous]

I’m honestly confused about why you would ever have a “strict” curfew and penalize your kid for being 10-15 minutes late or even 30 mins. The point of the curfew is to get them home, not to enforce an artificial deadline.

[Anonymous]

No curfew really…this is kind of out the door now. My daughter respects that she shouldn’t be out super late. But we don’t have a strict rule. Everything is traceable now so we know where she is and with whom. Most activities nowadays take,place earlier and the kids are exhausted before midnight anyway.

The stricter you are with your kids, the more it backfires. Give them respect and trust. Let them make some mistakes. But being overly strict doesn’t help anyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Which are you:

1. The deadline is the deadline. Plan ahead, if needed.

2. Around the deadline is fine because you’d rather them not speed to make it home.

We talk about what is reasonable ahead of time. And as long as I'm kept in the loop, and trust isn't abused, we are flexible. That said, kid is not a night owl or partier (yet) so she's not out super late really ever.