Do you have a diverse group of friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's why I like to say that the US is more like a salad bowl and not a melting pot.
You guys can all be in the same country but in no way you mix up how you should.

Not for all of us. Some of us are mixin it up! In my family there is white, black and Asian. In my circle of friends, colleagues, and students, every corner of the globe represented. Even my earliest memories of growing up in DC, are of playing with my friends from Indonesia, Laos, Italy and Ethiopia.

[Anonymous]

Yes, diverse in all ways except economic. No middle class or poor friends. Couldn't afford our neighborhood.

[Anonymous]

Similar to PP, no economic diversity. No diversity in the public school (McLean). DH is black, I'm not. When DS was young, he once said to DH, upon seeing another black man "look, Papa, there's your friend". Uhm...guess we need more black friends? We never really thought of it that way before. Not too much racial diversity where we are, but tons of international. And zero socioeconomic.

[Anonymous]

In terms of the people we socialize with regularly, one is Chinese, the rest are probably white. A few are gay. They definitely run the gamut of political and religious viewpoints as well as occupations.

[Anonymous]

Are we talking about racially, ethinically or economically diverse?

My group is primarily white and born in the US. There are some of most ethnicities. I have a noticable lack of Arab friends, though a few Persian ones.

[Anonymous]

"all of the "diverse" people I am friends with are married to a white person."

This is my situation for the most part.

[Anonymous]

I think so. Went to watch football this past fall and looked around the table at my friends. There were 2 hispanic guys, 1 hispanic woman, 1 asian guy, 2 black guys, 2 white guys (1 jewish) and 4 white girls (1 jewish.) My circle felt pretty diverse. There are definitely a lot more black guys than black women in my circle, though, and my close girlfriends are all white or Asian. I have more Christian friends, quite a few Jewish friends, but only a couple of Muslim friends. I'd guess that my friends are about 50/50 Republican/Democrat, judging from their facebook postings. We are not especially diverse when it comes to economic status - the overwhelming majority of us (95%) graduated from college, many have Masters degrees, and most have pretty good jobs.

When I go to bars, I do notice that they're generally overwhelmingly white or overwhelmingly black (or overwhelmingly hispanic or asian, in certain suburbs.) I wonder if people seek out their own race, or just go where they're more comfortable. I admit that I would probably feel like an outsider in some of the majority-black clubs in DC. I'd go, but I might feel like people were wondering why I was there.

I plan to send my daughter to public school, and I hope to find a school that has a pretty good mix of kids. I wouldn't want to send her to Langley, Yorktown or probably Woodson, which are all overwhelmingly white. I don't feel like that really reflects the real world, even if test scores are better.

[Anonymous]

While I do have friends of different backgrounds and appearance, they do not have a great variety of life experience. My Korean friend was raised in the States and is as American as I am. My Russian friend, though she has a Hollywood thick accent, is completely up on all the American cultural and socialtal norms. My AA friends went to top private schools and don't relate to the DC AA experience. Heck, I'm even married to a man who came to the States in his 20s, and the only people from his country that we hang out with are the fully-integrated ones. To be a FOB (fresh off the boat), either in reality or just in behavior, is grounds for disqualification from their circle.

So honestly, I don't feel like my friends are very diverse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I try really hard not to make comparisons between NYC and DC because I want to appreciate DC for itself and not constantly compare it to other places. But, I really do miss the diverse group of close friendships I had in NYC. These friendships developed organically--I didn't make a conscious effort to have friends from across the world but it happened and I really felt it enriched me. I am a member of a minority myself and I felt so at ease in NY. DC is certainly not lacking for diversity, I love that there are people from all over the world here. However, DC just seems much more segregated to me. It seems like people's social circle here is often reflective of their race.

I have been to a number of parties with a few of my black friends and literally every single person in the room is black. Likewise, I have been to many other parties and everyone there is white. How is this possible? The majority of both sets of friends are in the same socio-economic class. I really just started noticing it because it is in such stark contrast to my interactions in NYC. I once hosted a cocktail party here where I had a number of out of town friends attend and many of my DC friends commented on how amazed they were that I had such a diverse group of friends (this wasn't intended as a negative comment just an observation).

Anyway, I'm really just curious as to whether the lack of diversity I've encountered in social circles here is an aberration or whether other people have had similar experiences. I have a young DS and I really do not want him to be in a socially segregated environment

NOT AT ALL the case for us. We are only the few 'american born' in our group. My son's preschool was made up of only about 1/3 American kids (this was in Georgetown). As a result- his and our friends are from all over the world. We are caucasian and my son's 2 best friends are African American. My DH and I have a VERY diverse group of friends---nationality-wise, sexual-orientation wise, with kids w/out kids, much younger, much older, etc. I am curious, where do you live?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I try really hard not to make comparisons between NYC and DC because I want to appreciate DC for itself and not constantly compare it to other places. But, I really do miss the diverse group of close friendships I had in NYC. These friendships developed organically--I didn't make a conscious effort to have friends from across the world but it happened and I really felt it enriched me. I am a member of a minority myself and I felt so at ease in NY. DC is certainly not lacking for diversity, I love that there are people from all over the world here. However, DC just seems much more segregated to me. It seems like people's social circle here is often reflective of their race.

I have been to a number of parties with a few of my black friends and literally every single person in the room is black. Likewise, I have been to many other parties and everyone there is white. How is this possible? The majority of both sets of friends are in the same socio-economic class. I really just started noticing it because it is in such stark contrast to my interactions in NYC. I once hosted a cocktail party here where I had a number of out of town friends attend and many of my DC friends commented on how amazed they were that I had such a diverse group of friends (this wasn't intended as a negative comment just an observation).

Anyway, I'm really just curious as to whether the lack of diversity I've encountered in social circles here is an aberration or whether other people have had similar experiences. I have a young DS and I really do not want him to be in a socially segregated environment

NOT AT ALL the case for us. We are only the few 'american born' in our group. My son's preschool was made up of only about 1/3 American kids (this was in Georgetown). As a result- his and our friends are from all over the world. We are caucasian and my son's 2 best friends are African American. My DH and I have a VERY diverse group of friends---nationality-wise, sexual-orientation wise, with kids w/out kids, much younger, much older, etc. I am curious, where do you live?

my best friend at work (going on 15 years) came over on a boat from Vietnam and was raised by nuns until members of her family came over much later...I am sorry I still can't believe you find dc so non-diverse. I have a brother in NYC and all of my other relatives are up there so I really don't see the lack in diversity down here...maybe in the cultural/arts, but not in the ppl! That's ludicrous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think so. Went to watch football this past fall and looked around the table at my friends. There were 2 hispanic guys, 1 hispanic woman, 1 asian guy, 2 black guys, 2 white guys (1 jewish) and 4 white girls (1 jewish.) My circle felt pretty diverse. There are definitely a lot more black guys than black women in my circle, though, and my close girlfriends are all white or Asian. I have more Christian friends, quite a few Jewish friends, but only a couple of Muslim friends. I'd guess that my friends are about 50/50 Republican/Democrat, judging from their facebook postings. We are not especially diverse when it comes to economic status - the overwhelming majority of us (95%) graduated from college, many have Masters degrees, and most have pretty good jobs.

When I go to bars, I do notice that they're generally overwhelmingly white or overwhelmingly black (or overwhelmingly hispanic or asian, in certain suburbs.) I wonder if people seek out their own race, or just go where they're more comfortable. I admit that I would probably feel like an outsider in some of the majority-black clubs in DC. I'd go, but I might feel like people were wondering why I was there.

I plan to send my daughter to public school, and I hope to find a school that has a pretty good mix of kids. I wouldn't want to send her to Langley, Yorktown or probably Woodson, which are all overwhelmingly white. I don't feel like that really reflects the real world, even if test scores are better.

Actually, Yorktown is not as overwhelmingly white as you might think. Here are the statistics for this past school year:

Asian 194 11.3%
Black 142 8.3%
Hispanic 225 13.2%
White 1133 66.3%

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I try really hard not to make comparisons between NYC and DC because I want to appreciate DC for itself and not constantly compare it to other places. But, I really do miss the diverse group of close friendships I had in NYC. These friendships developed organically--I didn't make a conscious effort to have friends from across the world but it happened and I really felt it enriched me. I am a member of a minority myself and I felt so at ease in NY. DC is certainly not lacking for diversity, I love that there are people from all over the world here. However, DC just seems much more segregated to me. It seems like people's social circle here is often reflective of their race.

I have been to a number of parties with a few of my black friends and literally every single person in the room is black. Likewise, I have been to many other parties and everyone there is white. How is this possible? The majority of both sets of friends are in the same socio-economic class. I really just started noticing it because it is in such stark contrast to my interactions in NYC. I once hosted a cocktail party here where I had a number of out of town friends attend and many of my DC friends commented on how amazed they were that I had such a diverse group of friends (this wasn't intended as a negative comment just an observation).

Anyway, I'm really just curious as to whether the lack of diversity I've encountered in social circles here is an aberration or whether other people have had similar experiences. I have a young DS and I really do not want him to be in a socially segregated environment

NOT AT ALL the case for us. We are only the few 'american born' in our group. My son's preschool was made up of only about 1/3 American kids (this was in Georgetown). As a result- his and our friends are from all over the world. We are caucasian and my son's 2 best friends are African American. My DH and I have a VERY diverse group of friends---nationality-wise, sexual-orientation wise, with kids w/out kids, much younger, much older, etc. I am curious, where do you live?

my best friend at work (going on 15 years) came over on a boat from Vietnam and was raised by nuns until members of her family came over much later...I am sorry I still can't believe you find dc so non-diverse. I have a brother in NYC and all of my other relatives are up there so I really don't see the lack in diversity down here...maybe in the cultural/arts, but not in the ppl! That's ludicrous.

OP here--I should clarify my statement. I do not think DC is lacking at all in terms of racial diversity. What I find surprising is the segregation I see in different social circles. I am pleased to hear about the experiences of several posters who have a diverse group of friends here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I try really hard not to make comparisons between NYC and DC because I want to appreciate DC for itself and not constantly compare it to other places. But, I really do miss the diverse group of close friendships I had in NYC. These friendships developed organically--I didn't make a conscious effort to have friends from across the world but it happened and I really felt it enriched me. I am a member of a minority myself and I felt so at ease in NY. DC is certainly not lacking for diversity, I love that there are people from all over the world here. However, DC just seems much more segregated to me. It seems like people's social circle here is often reflective of their race.

I have been to a number of parties with a few of my black friends and literally every single person in the room is black. Likewise, I have been to many other parties and everyone there is white. How is this possible? The majority of both sets of friends are in the same socio-economic class. I really just started noticing it because it is in such stark contrast to my interactions in NYC. I once hosted a cocktail party here where I had a number of out of town friends attend and many of my DC friends commented on how amazed they were that I had such a diverse group of friends (this wasn't intended as a negative comment just an observation).

Anyway, I'm really just curious as to whether the lack of diversity I've encountered in social circles here is an aberration or whether other people have had similar experiences. I have a young DS and I really do not want him to be in a socially segregated environment

NOT AT ALL the case for us. We are only the few 'american born' in our group. My son's preschool was made up of only about 1/3 American kids (this was in Georgetown). As a result- his and our friends are from all over the world. We are caucasian and my son's 2 best friends are African American. My DH and I have a VERY diverse group of friends---nationality-wise, sexual-orientation wise, with kids w/out kids, much younger, much older, etc. I am curious, where do you live?

Just curious if you think your experience is typical for Georgetown? I would love to find a neighborhood that is truly integrated in terms of social interactions between different races and ethnicities. We live in a neighborhood in DC that is lauded for its racial diversity but I'm finding that different groups of people really segregate themselves here. For example, there is little social interaction between members of the Orthodox Jewish community here and others.

[Anonymous]

def. typical on the East side of gtown (east village) and a lot of the west as well....

tons of world bank, imf and embassy-types. it felt very much like a european neighborhood when I lived there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want your DS to be in a socially integrated environment than you can start by sending him to a public school.

I think many of the best public schools in this area have an even bigger problem with diversity than the private schools.

That's true if you are in affluent areas, but if you are in a mixed area (e.g. Silver Spring), you get bona fide diversity in the schools.