Newly single AP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes married and I've been with AP for years so this adjustment is very hard. I understand the cheater issue because I'm a cheater too but would never cheat on my AP.

Do you consider it cheating on your AP when you sleep with your husband?

[Anonymous]

If people need a diagram to understand your question, you are probably doing something wrong to be in this situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes married and I've been with AP for years so this adjustment is very hard. I understand the cheater issue because I'm a cheater too but would never cheat on my AP.

Lol!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love those calling this a troll post just shows how effed up my situation is - good lord.

So you're OP? I still don't get what's going on. Fourth person?

So you're married and AP was married and now isn't? Or you're single and AP was married and now is single? And AP was having affairs with you AND one other person, this "fourth"? You mention "a friendship with an ex for years" so was that the person sending your AP those salacious texts? Because if you believe this was a friendship with an ex -- you are more naive than anyone in an affair really ought to be, OP.

Do you get that being called troll, and having any configuration of what i wrote above, is all effed up? Maybe stop seeing anyone at all and take time to delve into why you were engaged in a relationship with someone who was unavailable and whether you got off on the secrecy etc. I'm not saying that judgementally though in print it may read that way. But you need to ask yourself why you made this choice, why this person, and why you are not furious that your AP was texting like this with a supposed ex. And why you're willing to believe that this "ex" is truly an ex and not another AP. Quit your AP and focus on yourself and what this affair fulfilled in you, and why you tolerated it.

And yeah, if AP will cheat with you, AP will cheat ON you. Sure, there are couples who began as APs and who last. But look at threads here about people whose APs later cheated on them if they got together. Have more self-respect, and do the work of more introspection, OP.

+1. I have no idea who OP is in this scenario. Very poorly written.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love those calling this a troll post just shows how effed up my situation is - good lord.

So you're OP? I still don't get what's going on. Fourth person?

So you're married and AP was married and now isn't? Or you're single and AP was married and now is single? And AP was having affairs with you AND one other person, this "fourth"? You mention "a friendship with an ex for years" so was that the person sending your AP those salacious texts? Because if you believe this was a friendship with an ex -- you are more naive than anyone in an affair really ought to be, OP.

Do you get that being called troll, and having any configuration of what i wrote above, is all effed up? Maybe stop seeing anyone at all and take time to delve into why you were engaged in a relationship with someone who was unavailable and whether you got off on the secrecy etc. I'm not saying that judgementally though in print it may read that way. But you need to ask yourself why you made this choice, why this person, and why you are not furious that your AP was texting like this with a supposed ex. And why you're willing to believe that this "ex" is truly an ex and not another AP. Quit your AP and focus on yourself and what this affair fulfilled in you, and why you tolerated it.

And yeah, if AP will cheat with you, AP will cheat ON you. Sure, there are couples who began as APs and who last. But look at threads here about people whose APs later cheated on them if they got together. Have more self-respect, and do the work of more introspection, OP.

How about her OWN husband and kids for crying out loud??? WTF?

[Anonymous]

I know someone who caught her DH with one AP then discovered another AP during same time. The APs still don’t know about each other.

[Anonymous]

I'm confused. So you and AP are both married and AP is sleeping with a third person in addition to their spouse and you?

[Anonymous]

These guys are pros. They will love bomb the AP for the external validation it provides them even though they couldn't give 2 sh*ts about them. And the AP is so over the top smitten hanging on every word that they 'are the best'...meanwhile, the same is being said/done to multiple others.

Cheaters are gross and disgusting people. OP demonstrates this. She's married for chrissakes and all wrapped up with zero empathy or care for being decent to her spouse.

[Anonymous]

Jerry Springer called OP, he's got a spot for you...

[Anonymous]

So AP has been balancing the spouse, you, and their ex for years?

I think AP has too much free time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know someone who caught her DH with one AP then discovered another AP during same time. The APs still don’t know about each other.

I'd have told the APs about each other and about my discovery of them, in that DW's shoes. They all need full panel STI testing for sure. I hope the DW kicked him to the curb as fast as possible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jerry Springer called OP, he's got a spot for you...

Winner!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AP suddenly single as spouse found salacious texts with what would be I suppose a 4th person. As painful as that reality is - a "friendship" with an ex for years and years - I now feel I can't be with this person. The connection is incredible but now I'm full of self doubt now and have zero trust. Anyone sucessfully take their relationship to the next level after their married partner became suddenly single?

Is the concern that you don’t want to be with this person or is the concern that they were texting with an ex while being with their spouse AND also you? It sounds like they are not into monogamy.

Well, OP isn't into monogamy either since OP says he or she is married.

And are we all assuming here that OP is a woman? I'm not sure of that. The first post does not indicate genders of anyone involved. Of course, being a scummy cheater is a condition which transcends all genders and orientations, sadly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes married and I've been with AP for years so this adjustment is very hard. I understand the cheater issue because I'm a cheater too but would never cheat on my AP.

Hilarious

[Anonymous]

Whut?