Any tips on how to get DH to help with DD

[Anonymous]

Everything you're feeling is valid, and true. But it's also probably 40% amped up due to the sleep deprivation. I recommend scheduling a conversation, and know going into it the 2 or 3 concrete things you want changed when you're done with it (i.e. he takes the 4 am feedings, he is on Sat 6am-noon so you can......(fillin the blank here). This is bold advice from a coward, however. When I was going through this with our six week old, I didn't have the energy or clarity to have this talk, so I scheduled a fake "girls get-together" and went to a friends house and slept for 14 hours. He was happy to cover for me (left enough milk for them, etc.) and I was a completely different person after getting some uniterrupted sleep, a shower AND a blow dry. Good luck. If you can, just keep chanting the word "temporary" to yourself, because this IS going to pass....also agree with other posters that our guys bond with the little ones around 4 months...my husband has since confessed that he was actually scared of our son when he was a newborn....HANG IN THERE!!!!

[Anonymous]

This problem comes up for us all the time. One thing that my husband seems to always respond better to is when I phrase it in terms of "I'm feeling overwhelmed and I need your help" rather than "I'm really frustrated that I'm the one doing everything." I know that we shouldn't HAVE to bear the brunt of the childrearing and I know we shouldn't HAVE to tiptoe around our husbands, but in the end I just think that he's likely to become a more co-equal partner if he feels that you're coming to him for help rather than coming to him to let off steam. Just my $0.02.

[zumbamama]

My DH always offered to help with late night feedings, but he is such a deep sleeper he would never hear the baby cry or wake up when I nudge him. Seriously, he could sleep through an earthquake! I have always been a light sleeper, so of course I was the one to get up every night for the first year. He would only do something when I would turn into a complete biatch from lack of sleep. So I agree with the PPs....talk to him before you turn into a sleep deprived monster like I did!

[Anonymous]

Schedule something on a weekend and leave him alone with baby for as long as your breastfeeding permits -- hopefully with pumping at least 4-6 hours can be arranged. He needs to bond with baby -- and fast -- and best way to do that is to be totally responsible for her an extended period of time.