What to do when a young kid complains about a sport?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP. 8

OP I know you know the answer to this, and I am sorry as well. He is too young and now he is burnt out from the sport. Tell him to finish the season and then take a break from the sport. Try rec next time, something a LOT less intense if it is a sport he wants to keep with or have him pick the sports he will do.

I am a BTDT mom, and caution friends all the time to take it slow. VERY few kids can handle that level of intensity that young - they are easy to spot because they tend to be intense kids with a lot of energy (who get mean when they are not involved with their sport).

Once you get to travel level, your kid has to be the one to want it, not you. There are ways to help though. Invite boys from the team over for playdates, sleepovers, fun excursions, etc. If they kids are friends then they will generally look forward to practice because they are with their friends. That is a huge component to any sport/activity.

You just described my daughter. I've never actually heard it put that way, but you're right. She hates it when her team takes August off and just gets ornery

[Anonymous]

Op here. So I have other kids so I am not naive. They are all involved in travel sports. The youngest got put in stuff because we were already at the fields. And we just kind of kept going full-well knowing that this is WAY too much for an 8 year old. So I do blame myself for the situation I am in. I do not for a second blame my kid for burnout.

What I am annoyed with myself for is that I held the first two out of intense travel sports until ages 10-11. And that 11 year old LOVES practice, games, anything to do with the sport.

I guess I just was looking for thoughts on what to do now. Is it worth talking to the coach? I was thinking of doing that, but not sure what it would accomplish.

[Anonymous]

The comment about "intense kids with a lot of energy" is spot on.

[Anonymous]

I would drop back to rec. It's too much for this kid

[Anonymous]

Pulling back now at 8 doesn't mean you quit the sport permanently! Don't make that connection for your kid. Pull back (maybe let him slack off, or only go to some but not all practices). If he likes the sport, and he sees older siblings enjoying it, he'll get back into it eventually. But if you push it too hard, he'll hate it and never want to do it.

You may want to do something else in the meanwhile, or just give him a break. Esp if something he and you can do together, without other siblings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. So I have other kids so I am not naïve. They are all involved in travel sports. The youngest got put in stuff because we were already at the fields. And we just kind of kept going full-well knowing that this is WAY too much for an 8 year old. So I do blame myself for the situation I am in. I do not for a second blame my kid for burnout.

What I am annoyed with myself for is that I held the first two out of intense travel sports until ages 10-11. And that 11 year old LOVES practice, games, anything to do with the sport.

I guess I just was looking for thoughts on what to do now. Is it worth talking to the coach? I was thinking of doing that, but not sure what it would accomplish.

OP it is always worth talking to the coach and explaining. The coach should understand the kid is 8. Dial the sport WAY back. Really at that age a practice or two a week is great. Do other sports. Switch to rec and stay there for a bit. You know what to do.

I was the poster who talked about the intense kid with lots of energy. I have three kids and one is very focused at a very young age (7) on their sport - now 13 and still intense. I would never do that to my other two because they would have rebelled. We are still easing them into whatever it is that they end up doing or wanting to do at 10 and 12, with the 12 year old now hinting about getting serious, the 10 year old as well but I put a governor on that kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. So I have other kids so I am not naive. They are all involved in travel sports. The youngest got put in stuff because we were already at the fields. And we just kind of kept going full-well knowing that this is WAY too much for an 8 year old. So I do blame myself for the situation I am in. I do not for a second blame my kid for burnout.

What I am annoyed with myself for is that I held the first two out of intense travel sports until ages 10-11. And that 11 year old LOVES practice, games, anything to do with the sport.

I guess I just was looking for thoughts on what to do now. Is it worth talking to the coach? I was thinking of doing that, but not sure what it would accomplish.

They love it because you held them out. 8 is way too young.

What would you talk to the coach about? Travel sports at this age is a money making thing. It's not for anyone's benefit.

[Anonymous]

How much longer is the season? Did your kid ask to do this? Or did you just sign him up?

[Anonymous]

Kid loves kids on team. Wanted to do it because of team. Season is March-June.

[Anonymous]

Finish season and done. And that is way too much for an 8 yo

[Anonymous]

If he asked to be on the team and knew what he was signing up for, I’d make him finish the season and then switch to Rec the following season if he’s still interested.

[Anonymous]

Once a kid doesn't want to go to practice and doesn't give 100% during practice, it's time to stop the sport. Not at the end of the season, now. Your kid is obviously miserable, don't force them to continue going.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op. Have already paid in full. Several kids available to take spot.

Well, the money is out of the door, so don't think about it. If he's miserable and its making everyone else miserable, just quit and take the loss. Play cheap rec.

this

[Anonymous]

8 year olds are fickle. It’s ok for them to want to try and stuff and not finish the season. Don’t make him scared to sign up for other things by making everyone miserable. Let him stop. My kid swims but not particularly well lol, she likes going twice a week to practice though. I hope she becomes more competitive and gets into it big I also know that at any time she can say she doesn’t want to do it anymore and I need to be ok with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Once a kid doesn't want to go to practice and doesn't give 100% during practice, it's time to stop the sport. Not at the end of the season, now. Your kid is obviously miserable, don't force them to continue going.

I disagree with this UNLESS you sign up the kid without asking. We have always asked our kids if they wanted to do something and explained it to them. I have one kid that said no to everything and I signed them up. Since it was not their commitment I would have pulled them if miserable (thankfully it never happened, always loved it) My other kids would choose things and sometimes come to me with things, in that case they had to commit to the season. We explained responsibility and seeing things through.

I would tell them that they would not have to do it again but that they have to follow through on obligations.