Check your phone at the door

[Anonymous]

I would never ask anyone to do that. That’s quite controlling of a host. And I would be irritated at a parents who took my child’s phone away. It isn’t their right, is it?

[Anonymous]

My kids' friends would simply choose to hang out at other houses. Sorry, just being honest. They'd find that overly controlling. (And I say this as a mom of kids who have nice relationships with their friends and do NOT spend excessive amounts of time on their phones when they're together.)

[Anonymous]

For sure yes to this for middle schoolers. Esp 6th and 7th when they shouldn’t even really have these stupid things. Not in high school.

And for the parent who’d be offended by this? That’s crazy! Wouldn’t you be happy a parent is a trying to encourage face to face socializing? Getting kids off the phones? I know I would like that parent MORE and be more inclined to send my kid to their house if they did this!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have his policy with middle school daughters. Not for small groups, but when there are five or more kids over, when I greet them, I ask them to leave their phones in the kitchen and tell them they are welcome to them anytime I just don’t want them in the basement. I’ve never had a problem, but I also know all the parents.

One of the kindest, most social people I know did this with her kids who are now in college. Her house was still the gathering house. I don't do it, but it definitely was food for thought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For sure yes to this for middle schoolers. Esp 6th and 7th when they shouldn’t even really have these stupid things. Not in high school.

And for the parent who’d be offended by this? That’s crazy! Wouldn’t you be happy a parent is a trying to encourage face to face socializing? Getting kids off the phones? I know I would like that parent MORE and be more inclined to send my kid to their house if they did this!

No. I would be mad you took my kid’s only means of contact with me away from them without my permission. And that you treated my mature, adolescent kid like someone you can control rather than a guest in your house.

[Anonymous]

I don't know about checking phones but my kids friend tiktok'd a tour of my home and posted it to her 20k followers and the world, forever until the apocalypse. It felt like a gross violation of my privacy and that girl isn't allowed to come over again

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For sure yes to this for middle schoolers. Esp 6th and 7th when they shouldn’t even really have these stupid things. Not in high school.

And for the parent who’d be offended by this? That’s crazy! Wouldn’t you be happy a parent is a trying to encourage face to face socializing? Getting kids off the phones? I know I would like that parent MORE and be more inclined to send my kid to their house if they did this!

No. I would be mad you took my kid’s only means of contact with me away from them without my permission. And that you treated my mature, adolescent kid like someone you can control rather than a guest in your house.

Only means of contact? You must be very young to have no experience with life before everyone-has-a-phone-with-unlimited-everything. Were you 10 when you had your DC? Or maybe 13?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't know about checking phones but my kids friend tiktok'd a tour of my home and posted it to her 20k followers and the world, forever until the apocalypse. It felt like a gross violation of my privacy and that girl isn't allowed to come over again

Dang, that’s awful

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For sure yes to this for middle schoolers. Esp 6th and 7th when they shouldn’t even really have these stupid things. Not in high school.

And for the parent who’d be offended by this? That’s crazy! Wouldn’t you be happy a parent is a trying to encourage face to face socializing? Getting kids off the phones? I know I would like that parent MORE and be more inclined to send my kid to their house if they did this!

No. I would be mad you took my kid’s only means of contact with me away from them without my permission. And that you treated my mature, adolescent kid like someone you can control rather than a guest in your house.

Yes, this is the aspect that irks me. It feels very controlling to me. We carry our phones everywhere and use them for all sorts of things. I know I wouldn’t want someone to take mine away. If kids are in elementary school, fine. But I wouldn’t do it to a middle schooler and certainly not high schoolers.

Although…the poor mom who had her house filmed and put on tik tok. Geez… now THAT is the only convincing reason to take their phones away! What a little jerk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For sure yes to this for middle schoolers. Esp 6th and 7th when they shouldn’t even really have these stupid things. Not in high school.

And for the parent who’d be offended by this? That’s crazy! Wouldn’t you be happy a parent is a trying to encourage face to face socializing? Getting kids off the phones? I know I would like that parent MORE and be more inclined to send my kid to their house if they did this!

No. I would be mad you took my kid’s only means of contact with me away from them without my permission. And that you treated my mature, adolescent kid like someone you can control rather than a guest in your house.

Yes, this is the aspect that irks me. It feels very controlling to me. We carry our phones everywhere and use them for all sorts of things. I know I wouldn’t want someone to take mine away. If kids are in elementary school, fine. But I wouldn’t do it to a middle schooler and certainly not high schoolers.

Although…the poor mom who had her house filmed and put on tik tok. Geez… now THAT is the only convincing reason to take their phones away! What a little jerk.

This. People need to move past the l obsession with the idea that everyone is "staring" at their phones. It leads to silliness like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For sure yes to this for middle schoolers. Esp 6th and 7th when they shouldn’t even really have these stupid things. Not in high school.

And for the parent who’d be offended by this? That’s crazy! Wouldn’t you be happy a parent is a trying to encourage face to face socializing? Getting kids off the phones? I know I would like that parent MORE and be more inclined to send my kid to their house if they did this!

No. I would be mad you took my kid’s only means of contact with me away from them without my permission. And that you treated my mature, adolescent kid like someone you can control rather than a guest in your house.

Yes, this is the aspect that irks me. It feels very controlling to me. We carry our phones everywhere and use them for all sorts of things. I know I wouldn’t want someone to take mine away. If kids are in elementary school, fine. But I wouldn’t do it to a middle schooler and certainly not high schoolers.

Although…the poor mom who had her house filmed and put on tik tok. Geez… now THAT is the only convincing reason to take their phones away! What a little jerk.

This. People need to move past the l obsession with the idea that everyone is "staring" at their phones. It leads to silliness like this.

Sure, we'll move past the obsession with the idea that everyone is staring at their phones, as soon as everyone stops staring at their phones. Deal?

[Anonymous]

It’s been great for my house - weeds out the people that are addicted to phones (kids AND parents). Parents who think they need to be in contact with their kid constantly are not my tribe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one can see porn in my house if their phone is with me. That’s my reasoning.

You simply cannot control people as much as you think you can.

Not sure what you mean? If all phones are with me, they can’t see porn in my house. Right?

They can other places. They can other times. But not in my basement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be weirded out if I found out my kid was forced to check their phone at the door in your house.

+1

This. A dad recently took my 17 year olds cell phone (and the phones of all 6 kids that had come over) because he wanted them to interact with each other. We had a family change in plans and I was frantically texting/calling my kid to no avail. I finally got a hold of the dad (he was outside doing yard work) who admitted he had put all of their phones in a box by the door and they were downstairs playing video games. I was pretty hot (at the dad, not my kid.)

Yes, I know we all lived in a time where we didn't all have phones. But folks also use to not have cars and rode horses. You don't see a hitching post outside my house.

[Anonymous]

We have a basket near front door/kitchen where our kids drop their phones and a lot of times their friends do. I give all friends my phone number and tell their parents they can always reach their kids by calling me for them. As if it's the 1980's. Your kid isn't a surgeon - there's no emergency that requires your 12 year old. We've had this set-up for years and never had a parent tell me they have a problem, or a kid say they can't come to our house because of the phone thing.

The kids are welcome to go over to their phone any time they want. Some have to check in every half hour.