Maureen Dowd column on Landon

[Anonymous]

I know three families who are starting at Landon in the fall. I know they began the application process well before the latest scandal, but I still kind of wonder why in the world anyone would start their son there right now. Not leaving, I can understand, but beginning? I don't know them well enough to ask, oh well!

[Anonymous]

I have not been so repulsed by story about highschool kids since the story about the boys who raped and molested the mentally-limited girl many years (decades?) ago. This is disgusting. It is really hard to understand how these young boys are so depraved and disrespetcful of the female gender and of parents. It makes me think they must regard their own parents as nothing more than jokes if they think "schmoozing parents" is so funny and easy.

We have know many, many Landon grads who are now in their 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, etc... There are many really amazing men amognst them. Its a school we were seriously considering as a top choice for our son. I will never apply my son to Landon now. Frankly, its sounds like the type of people (families) that Landon is attracting are really the worst sort and it does say quite a bit about the school and its culture and its tolerance for really the nastiest sort of chauvanism.

I usually role my eyes at parents who are "oh-so-shocked" about kids drinking, partying, being wild, etc... and cringe to think what they were like in highschool and college. This, however, this is something else entirely. This is beyond disgusting and actually evil. I don't think this is something that can be excused or explained away at all.

[Anonymous]

The misogyny, it boggles the mind.

It cannot be a coincidence that this same school keeps coming up again and again in these awful reports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The misogyny, it boggles the mind.

It cannot be a coincidence that this same school keeps coming up again and again in these awful reports.

My feelings exactly. One, two incidents: I would say, oh, coincidence, people should lay off. But over and over and over--well, at some point one stops believing that it is a coincidence.

[Anonymous]

Young boys need more supervision and discipline and appropriate (sometimes negative) feedback, primarily from their parents, and they would benefit from going to a school with female classmates and where sports is an activity intended to promote good physical health and a sense of community and teamwork ... not provide a showplace for boys' physical prowess and potential for hero status. But aside from such obvious generalizations ... it is hard to know how to respond to this latest "news." It is totally repulsive, yet I suspect it is also fairly pervasive given our culture these days ...

[Anonymous]

We also need to teach our girls to respect themselves. For the most part, barring any forceful action, if girls did not give in to these advances of these boys, there wouldnt be much for the boys to score points.

I know that when I was a teenage girl, I had a very hard time saying no to guys, for fear that I would be a "tease" or a "prude" or just wouldnt get to hang out at the good parties. Thankfully, I never went too far, bit I definitely had many nights where I wasnt very proud of myself.

We need to show girls that they are worth so much more than a point in a jocks bedpost and to respect themselves bc slimey guys will try and take advantage of them.

[Anonymous]

We also need to teach our girls to respect themselves. For the most part, barring any forceful action, if girls did not give in to these advances of these boys, there wouldnt be much for the boys to score points.

Well said! Let's not teach our girls to be victims.

[Anonymous]

Yikes. How stomach turning. Landon has a bad streak going . . .

[Anonymous]

Its hard even for girls who are strong and do respect themselves when there are so many boys out there who's parents dont seem to teach them any values at all other than valuing "scoring" at sporting events and at parties with girls.

I have an athletic 9 year old son who is alreadya pretty good Lax player (plays on a U9 travel team) and a younger daughter who is also showing athletic talent and lots of self confidence. Thankfully they attend a school that I believe helps instill very strong values, but values that still must start at home. When I read this column and tought of my children being 14, 15, 16, having kids like these as their school peers, I became almost physically sick and felt a kind of desperation at how to make sure they would never join, condone, turn a blind eye to, or even be exposed to other children like this. At some point, no mater how well you parent, how nice and kind and ethical your kids are, peer pressure kicks in and its a strong and dangerous pull.

Why are some many wealthy, well-educated, wordly parents failing their children and society so incredibly badly? To me this is the root of this problem: peple who refuse to actually parent. Clearly, these boys do NOT have good parents and its seems like bad (or lazy or clueless) parentsare attracted to Landon. It sucks.

[Anonymous]

Do not send your son to Landon. There are several other outstanding options for aspiring lacrosse players.

[Anonymous]

When I read this column and tought of my children being 14, 15, 16, having kids like these as their school peers, I became almost physically sick and felt a kind of desperation at how to make sure they would never join, condone, turn a blind eye to, or even be exposed to other children like this. At some point, no mater how well you parent, how nice and kind and ethical your kids are, peer pressure kicks in and its a strong and dangerous pull.

This. I felt the same sort of sense of, I don't know, panic? when I read this column. My little guy is a sweet, happy toddler who loves girls: loves hanging out with them, loves talking to them, thinks they're the coolest people in the whole wide world. How, how, HOW do I keep him on the right track? I used to prosecute in juvenile court. And I saw a lot of wonderful parents there, along with the cruddy ones. These good parents never planned for their kids to be in that situation but there they were. I wish so much I knew how to ensure that my son grows up to be a bookish, uncoordinated geek who doesn't even get the invite to these types of parties, then comes into his own in college -- just like Mom and Dad. I'm always on the lookout for a school that might help in that regard if anyone has any suggestions!

[Anonymous]

This is so appalling. Everyone in earlier threads kept saying to "stop bashing Landon". As an earlie poster here said...one or two times...ok...but really...another story about Landon like this? Are they raising animals over there. I can't wait to see how the Landon parents will brush this one off.

And for the people blaming the girls -- enough already. There not the predators these entitled boys are.

[Anonymous]

I don't think this is about parents refusing to parent. I think this is about parents with a value system that to some extent condones this type of behavior. There are many parents in this region that encourage ultra-competitive, selfish alpha-male behavior. Many of us encounter this in the workplace. Not to mention in all the SUV-drivers on the roads...

Some people simply don't believe that respect, humility, and empathy are the values that will enable their children to "get ahead" in today's world.

[Anonymous]

I have a fourteen year old son. Do you think I should tell him about the details of this article and use it as a teaching moment or should I just talk about about (once again) respecting women etc and not mention this episode at Landon?

[Anonymous]

wow. i mean wow. in a very strange way, i find this almost worse than than the love case. not to say DEATH is not worse (it is), this story is FAR more insidious and in some ways, SICK.