Do private schools take kids with ADHD

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You really want to disclose this at the front and hear if they are willing to accommodate. Do not try to sneak your kid in to a school that won't accommodate him, you are asking for trouble down the road. If your child has ADHD and the school doesn't have resources to support them, you need to know that before you commit. Don't put your kid in an environment where he will fail.

PP here. Yeah, part of me believes this. The other part of me is concerned that my daughter won't be accepted anywhere solely based on her diagnosis, and then she'll end up in a huge public school with a lot of disruptive students and teachers who are stretched to the breaking point and a lot of busy work and all of that will be completely disastrous for her.

[Anonymous]

We disclosed DD’s diagnosis for her K-8 application. We did not disclose her diagnosis for HS. We worried that the K-8 school would disclose it during the HS application process, but they assured us they wouldn’t and they didn’t think it was pertinent because our DD was medicated and didn’t have any issues. I have seen many ADHDkids get into very selective schools - at the HS level. I’m not sure what it looks like at the elementary level.

[Anonymous]

I don't think ADHD is a big deal to most schools as a diagnosis. It's really how it manifests and what supports the kids need. Mainstream privates are fine chunking assignments, extra time on tests, and giving class notes. What they don't want to deal with is behavior issues like kids melting down, aggression, oppositional behavior. And they want parents that don't expect that teachers will step in and do constant coaching for the EF issues like turning in assignments, etc.

I'd disclose but be really open about what your child does and doesn't need, what outside supports you are willing to employ, and I think your daughter will be fine.

[Anonymous]

They definitely do. Keep in mind there is adhd is a disorder with an absolutely huge range in terms of behavioral and academic impacts.

[Anonymous]

Every single school has kids with ADHD. The diagnosis won’t exclude your child from consideration. If it is well managed and doesn’t require more than a few simple accommodations (think extra time) it won’t be an issue. If your child has disruptive behaviors or can’t stay on task during the school day, they will be screened out. The shadow day is very useful in this regard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think ADHD is a big deal to most schools as a diagnosis. It's really how it manifests and what supports the kids need. Mainstream privates are fine chunking assignments, extra time on tests, and giving class notes. What they don't want to deal with is behavior issues like kids melting down, aggression, oppositional behavior. And they want parents that don't expect that teachers will step in and do constant coaching for the EF issues like turning in assignments, etc.

I'd disclose but be really open about what your child does and doesn't need, what outside supports you are willing to employ, and I think your daughter will be fine.

Yes I agree with this. We disclosed ADHD diagnosis at a private elementary school and were told, no problem. But two years later we were counseled out because the behavior was more than they could handle. Private schools generally have less tolerance for behavior issues and less resources to assist. So it depends on how the ADHD manifests.

Getting counseled out was awful and I wish we had just stuck with public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think ADHD is a big deal to most schools as a diagnosis. It's really how it manifests and what supports the kids need. Mainstream privates are fine chunking assignments, extra time on tests, and giving class notes. What they don't want to deal with is behavior issues like kids melting down, aggression, oppositional behavior. And they want parents that don't expect that teachers will step in and do constant coaching for the EF issues like turning in assignments, etc.

I'd disclose but be really open about what your child does and doesn't need, what outside supports you are willing to employ, and I think your daughter will be fine.

Yes I agree with this. We disclosed ADHD diagnosis at a private elementary school and were told, no problem. But two years later we were counseled out because the behavior was more than they could handle. Private schools generally have less tolerance for behavior issues and less resources to assist. So it depends on how the ADHD manifests.

Getting counseled out was awful and I wish we had just stuck with public.

What grade? We started a private at PreK, they started having a bunch of meetings with us mid 1st grade, by January, we were told to look at more schools.

[Anonymous]

Only until they cost more than you're paying

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think ADHD is a big deal to most schools as a diagnosis. It's really how it manifests and what supports the kids need. Mainstream privates are fine chunking assignments, extra time on tests, and giving class notes. What they don't want to deal with is behavior issues like kids melting down, aggression, oppositional behavior. And they want parents that don't expect that teachers will step in and do constant coaching for the EF issues like turning in assignments, etc.

I'd disclose but be really open about what your child does and doesn't need, what outside supports you are willing to employ, and I think your daughter will be fine.

Yes I agree with this. We disclosed ADHD diagnosis at a private elementary school and were told, no problem. But two years later we were counseled out because the behavior was more than they could handle. Private schools generally have less tolerance for behavior issues and less resources to assist. So it depends on how the ADHD manifests.

Getting counseled out was awful and I wish we had just stuck with public.

What grade? We started a private at PreK, they started having a bunch of meetings with us mid 1st grade, by January, we were told to look at more schools.

For us it was entered in K and exit in 2nd

[Anonymous]

Which is worse? For her not to get in due to ADHD, or for her to get in, and then get kicked out if they realize they can't handle her needs?

[Anonymous]

I’ve worked in several DC-area private schools. I can assure you that they all have many ADHD students, sometimes as much as 25 percent of the student population. Some schools offer extensive accommodations and design a curriculum that helps neurodivergent kids as well as neurotypical children to be as successful as possible. Other schools will only offer preferential seating and extended time on formal assessments. You have to know your child, know what recommendations your child’s care team recommends, and know the school to navigate it well.

As for “permanent record,” please don’t worry about that. ADHD is a medical diagnosis, so schools cannot share it with anyone without your consent. When the diagnosis is documented, teachers are more likely to communicate about effective interventions and accommodations that worked for your child. This means greater consistency and support between academic subjects and when your child advances to the next grade.

[Anonymous]

Agree with PP, our kid was struggling at his mainstream private school and got no help. Report cards said all was well, but when we asked specific questions the teacher would comment on a problem - slow at processing, can’t sit still, won’t get started, etc.

Once we had the diagnosis the school and teacher finally taught our child well, gave them more attention, communicated with us regularly.

It’s a shame it took that, but squeaky wheel gets the grease.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve worked in several DC-area private schools. I can assure you that they all have many ADHD students, sometimes as much as 25 percent of the student population. Some schools offer extensive accommodations and design a curriculum that helps neurodivergent kids as well as neurotypical children to be as successful as possible. Other schools will only offer preferential seating and extended time on formal assessments. You have to know your child, know what recommendations your child’s care team recommends, and know the school to navigate it well.

As for “permanent record,” please don’t worry about that. ADHD is a medical diagnosis, so schools cannot share it with anyone without your consent. When the diagnosis is documented, teachers are more likely to communicate about effective interventions and accommodations that worked for your child. This means greater consistency and support between academic subjects and when your child advances to the next grade.

Would you be willing to share which schools are the ones you mention in terms of being really good at designing an accessible curriculum? You can imagine how much that advice would help my child and many of us…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you don't tell his school, his behavior looks like he's "bad" or "lazy" and that stays in his record forever. He's going to get labeled regardless -- would you rather it be with a medical diagnosis and accommodations or by his failure to meet expectations?

The only exception is if he is getting good grades, not having any social or behavioral problems, and doesn't need accommodations -- but then he probably wouldn't have been diagnosed.

My DS has ADHD and attends a selective private school and is doing great with meds and accommodations.

Not necessarily. I went to a prestigious private and was diagnosed with ADHD in MS. No behavior issues and good grades but it was apparent to everyone that I had ADHD in ES and needed to work harder to get organized and not blurt answers out. I was medicated at the end of MS but really would have benefited from medication at the end of ES or beginning of MS - 4th or 5th grade.

OP- Even if your child doesn't have behavior issues and gets good grades, it may still be apparent to teachers that there is something there. That said, if you aren't seeing accommodations then I wouldn't add it to the application unless the school explicitly asks.

[Anonymous]

I think this will depend on the school. I know of people being counseled out (befor a diagnosis) in at least one.