How soon is too soon for pet names?

[Anonymous]

"Hey, I'm really looking forward to our first date, but you calling me babe/sweetie before we get to know each other is making me uncomfortable."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To me, "Babe" is that pig from the kid's movie.

So are.you saying it's appropriate or inappropriate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To me, "Babe" is that pig from the kid's movie.

So are.you saying it's appropriate or inappropriate?

I wouldn't be flattered if someone called me Pumbaa or Tuk Tuk but if you're ok with it then you should tell your DH right away.

[Anonymous]

I don't subscribe so much to the idea of a strict timeline for things like pet names as paying attention to how you feel in a specific instance. In this instance, you're already feeling annoyed and you haven't even gone on a first date. I'd listen to that feeling and not even spend time worrying about the "why" so much. Something in you is just telling you this isn't the guy for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I met a guy while I was out with friends this past weekend. A few phone calls and text messages later and he’s already started with pet names (e.g., sweetie, babe, boo, etc). It annoys me because it feels like he's trying too hard too soon. Plus I'm admittedly not the pet name type. We are arranging our first date. Would you consider this a red flag or just an annoying personality trait?

Either he's doing it to avoid confusing different women; or he's immature (because these are babyish); or he's inexperienced with dating (and thinks this is somehow cool, cute or funny).

None of those things is a good sign. Only the last one, inexperienced, is really worth fixing IF you want. You could assume the best -- that he's just clueless, rather than juggling several woman while being too big a jerk to remember names -- and you could help him out and say, "Hey, we haven't even been out on one date yet and you're using boo and babe for me. Let's just use first names."

I'd go on that first date and see what vibe you get from him. Maybe he calls everyone in his life by nicknames (my brother and I had nicknames for each other, I have nicknames with some close friends, etc.). Or maybe he's trying too hard to sound cute. Either way, give him the "first name please" message and see if he takes it on board. If not? Maybe move on, unless he's worth working on.

[Anonymous]

“ Babe, I'm leaving, I must be on my way.” 😁

[Anonymous]

If my husband calls me by my first name, then I know he's mad about something.

He usually says "Babe" when he's just talking to me. I too don't understand the hated. He doesn't say it cutesy or too often.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If my husband calls me by my first name, then I know he's mad about something.

He usually says "Babe" when he's just talking to me. I too don't understand the hated. He doesn't say it cutesy or too often.

In OP's case, the guy is saying it before they've even been on ONE date. I

n your case, your husband is using it. Husband, if wife likes it? Fine, it's sweet.

Stranger you've met once in a group setting and with whom you haven't even had a first date? Nope, not fine. Presumptuous and a bit disrespectful in that case.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If my husband calls me by my first name, then I know he's mad about something.

He usually says "Babe" when he's just talking to me. I too don't understand the hatred. He doesn't say it cutesy or too often.

In OP's case, the guy is saying it before they've even been on ONE date. I

n your case, your husband is using it. Husband, if wife likes it? Fine, it's sweet.

Stranger you've met once in a group setting and with whom you haven't even had a first date? Nope, not fine. Presumptuous and a bit disrespectful in that case.

Okay, yes I agree there. Not sure when he started calling me babe, but it wasn't right away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't subscribe so much to the idea of a strict timeline for things like pet names as paying attention to how you feel in a specific instance. In this instance, you're already feeling annoyed and you haven't even gone on a first date. I'd listen to that feeling and not even spend time worrying about the "why" so much. Something in you is just telling you this isn't the guy for you.

Op here, and this is spot on. It feels like game to me, and that's why I find it annoying. I find that some guys will try to form a rapid faux bond with you as a ploy to get laid quickly, and I feel like that's what he's doing. So lame