Why the conflict between older and younger women?
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Anonymous
| I don't necessarily think it's indicative of general conflict between older and younger women. Two people can have a conflict on this particular issue but still be close. It's just a case of two people coming from very different perspectives, and sometimes that can lead to worse things like name calling but usually doesn't. |
Anonymous
My guess is that it is partly a corollary of what White men are facing. Read "Dying of Whiteness". They are entitled because that is how they are socialized but suddenly they see that life is not serving up to them what they think everyone else is getting. In comparison, most other races and cultures in USA have already factored in their disadvantages of being non-WASP. So their world view and life strategy already compensates for all of that. When White women see how advantageous it is that "others" are getting what is their due (McMansions in good school districts, Grandparents helping with childcare, DH helping at home, DH making a lot of money, kids going to private schools-magnets, vacations abroad, kids excelling, mostly intact families, outsourcing chores...) there is a sense of anger and being played. Similarly, they are realizing that being in the workplace is skewed against working moms - unequal pay, inflexible work day, school closing, lack of good childcare, remote learning etc, and when they see any non-WASPs doing better they are angry. Non-WASPs have their own struggles but they are very aware of the inequality and they, their families and communities band together to minimize that. So the younger and older women are dependent on each other and try to get along. In reality, the America of many decades ago has disappeared. Being college educated does not get you a MC or UMC life. Especially if you are in a place like DMV. The individualistic culture of WASP families have left these women alone to juggle work, child rearing, housework etc because previous generations were able to do it much easily because of higher HHI, schools providing education and childcare and women not being in the workforce in such large numbers. Now they feel slammed. |
Anonymous
Not all white women are WASPs. Why the particular focus on this subset? Do many women even identify this way? |
Anonymous
Really interesting and thoughtful thank you. Gonna chew on that a bit. |
Anonymous
But what if it was really important like you left your coffee on top of the car or your stroller is rolling down the hill? |
Anonymous
| Internalized misogyny is a thing. That said, once I deprogrammed myself from that, embraced my feminine energy, and engaged in self-love, my relationships with everyone improved. I am very distrustful of men for obvious reasons and absolutely adore and embrace my woman friends, who range in age from mid-twenties to late fifties, and seek to continue to connect with women in my workplace and community. I adore women and want us to be cherished and protected in this world. |
Anonymous
to I have never experienced this and I have friends 20 years younger and 20 years older Me thinks thou art trying to stir up trouble. |
Anonymous
Perhaps not. Time will tell. Most of us eat several plates of crow over time. Not always age related of course. But that happens too. No one should behave as if they know more. We have no idea what someone else’s experiences are. I’m not disagreeing with you. |
Anonymous
Wow! The truth is that you probably need it more than you care to admit. Get some anger management counseling and fast. |
Anonymous
Please don't get her going again. |
Anonymous
|
I don't think it is a younger or an older woman conflict. But, I do think younger women may feel more unsupported in the period when they run their own household after marriage, have young children, are working full time etc. These are usually intense period of a woman's life when it is prime child rearing and earning years, however, in most other cultures there is significant support for the women during this time.
Because of the way American society and work culture is, women are not supported. Couple that with the predominant culture where people are expected to become independent as soon as they turn 18 is also not doing these women any favor because they are lifting all the load of marriage, childcare and work without much support. If established institutions like schools shut down or become remote, they are pretty much up the $hitz creek without a paddle. |
Anonymous
Perhaps people pity you when they see you relentlessly struggle unnecessarily. Just tell them you like it as is. |
Anonymous
That’s…not unsolicited advice. That’s…not what unsolicited advice is. Do you get it? |
Anonymous
Ask any therapist, counselor, or advice columnist if walking up to someone you don’t know and giving them unsolicited advice is a good idea or a not-so-good idea. Go on, I’ll wait. |
Anonymous
Bland, disinterested smile! I hope you get the attention you so desperately seek somewhere. |