I may skip my sister in laws wedding

[Anonymous]

Yep - just skip it. And tell the truth about why you are skipping it.

[Anonymous]

Never be around FIL. Ever. And tell everyone exactly why if they ask.

I can’t believe your husband isn’t protecting you.

If you have a child, YOU MUST PROTECT YOUR CHILD FROM FIL.

[Anonymous]

Is it the first anniversary of your father’s death? I find the firsts to be the hardest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have to attend your husband’s sister’s wedding. Sorry.

No, she doesn’t. Sorry.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This sounds very dramatic!

Being assaulted is very dramatic.

[Anonymous]

Skip it. Your mental health matters. Send a nice gift and a sincere card wishing them well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Never be around FIL. Ever. And tell everyone exactly why if they ask.

I can’t believe your husband isn’t protecting you.

If you have a child, YOU MUST PROTECT YOUR CHILD FROM FIL.

NP. Yes. OP, your husband should cut off contact with his father over this. Do you not see that? Your. Husband. Should. Cut. ALL. Contact. With. His. Father.

No exceptions.

Does your DH know? If he does, does he make excuses for his father? "He doesn't mean it." "It's not meant to be sexual! Stop thinking it is!" "It's a joke!" "He does that with all the women, it's a love pat." And most toxic of all, "You're just overreacting; you're too sensitive; you can't take a joke" etc.

If your DH says any of those things, you need to tell him why it is not acceptable at all. Ever. The groping isn't and neither is DH's excusing his father in ANY way. I pray you do not have any children yet.

[Anonymous]

Seems like the anniversary of your father’s death would be justification for not attending. You can send your husband and a gift, and just tell them something like, “I’m sorry I can’t come, but the anniversary of my father’s death is going to be a hard, grief-filled day. I’m happy for you and wish you the very best, but I wouldn’t want my grief to impinge on such a joyous occasion.”

[Anonymous]

I call troll. No way a DH would accept his father grabbing his DW's butt.

[Anonymous]

OP, if you say you have Covid, then DH technically can't go, right?

Just say you're sorry to miss, but congratulations. When DH gets there he says: She's sorry to miss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Never be around FIL. Ever. And tell everyone exactly why if they ask.

I can’t believe your husband isn’t protecting you.

If you have a child, YOU MUST PROTECT YOUR CHILD FROM FIL.

NP. Yes. OP, your husband should cut off contact with his father over this. Do you not see that? Your. Husband. Should. Cut. ALL. Contact. With. His. Father.

No exceptions.

Does your DH know? If he does, does he make excuses for his father? "He doesn't mean it." "It's not meant to be sexual! Stop thinking it is!" "It's a joke!" "He does that with all the women, it's a love pat." And most toxic of all, "You're just overreacting; you're too sensitive; you can't take a joke" etc.

If your DH says any of those things, you need to tell him why it is not acceptable at all. Ever. The groping isn't and neither is DH's excusing his father in ANY way. I pray you do not have any children yet.

If her husband says those things, she should realize that it is highly likely that her husband and siblings were sexually assaulted as kids. That's where phrases like this are learned.

[Anonymous]

Yes, you skip; no, you don't claim COVID. You just say you can't attend and see if your SIL accepts your answer and moves along. If she asks why you're not attending, you tell her her father gropes you, so you won't be attending events where he's present. If she argues, just repeat that he's a groper and you won't be attending events where he's present.

[Anonymous]

Fake covid. Nobody needs any explanation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The dad gropes my butt, I have no relationship with the sister or brother in law and the stepmom is condescending and rude. It’s my birthday and the anniversary of my dads death on their wedding day. I don’t think I can handle being around them. Time to fake covid?

I would simply decline invitation without any explanation. This is your right as invitations are not command attendance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have to attend your husband’s sister’s wedding. Sorry.

I’m not. It’s a hard time for me and I have zero relationship with this couple. We see each other once a year for a night. My husbands dad has been married many times and has kids from all the marriages.

So if you have made up your mind, what's the point of your post. If the events are as bad as you say, my husband would not be attending either. I wouldn't need to fake anything and he wouldn't be going without me. Or you are just a drama queen, hence why you posted.