Nonreligious family sending child to religious school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Every day has prayer and a lot of the reading is thematic, but on our visit the books they read in the class was not religious. I was also impressed with the curricular choices, and the kids were nice.
I liked at least one of the teachers very much. It's hard to say. Am I ready to counterract this at home, and what is the chance that she is an outsider because we don't follow the same protocols at home?
That's the trouble really.

Catholic here. Keep in mind that the Catholics probably counteract some of what is taught in school, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My should attends a boys 6-12 Catholic school in DC and the staff and teachers are some of the most unkind, hypocritical, and defensive people I’ve dealt with. We will not return after this year and I say that as a Catholic.

+1

[Anonymous]

We have friends that sent both their kids to Catholic school, although dad is not religious, and mom is a lapsed Catholic. Pulled both kids by middle school, because the religious overtones were getting pretty serious/uncomfortable, and there were expectations, such as participation in the March for Life.

My brother (atheist) sent nephew to a Catholic school as well, because his ex is Catholic. They changed schools because the school/community became pretty openly hostile to the parents after they got divorced. And they didn't do a particularly good job teaching anyway; my DD who is a grade lower, was getting a better education in public school here.

[Anonymous]

We are Christian and attend an Episcopalian Church and are also a 2 mom family. We send DD to an Evangelical Church K-8. We looked into it because we wanted in person and mcps was such a mess. We had a meeting with the Principal and felt welcomed. We are now finishing up 4th grade and my kid is doing really well. Had a great teacher, made friends etc. I tho k we are the only Gay family there but have been totally welcomed and treated well. I’m hoping it keeps up thru 8th grade.

[Anonymous]

Former Catholic school student and now parent. I think MS is the hardest re: Catholic theology for non-Catholics (and Catholics). In ES it is much like PP mentioned, “Jesus loves me”, and “do unto others”, along with Catechism ( understanding Mass and prayers, etc)
HS is more study of bible and philosophy and usually has a very broad community.

Even as a practicing Catholic I have had to redirect some comments and instructions, play devil’s advocate, more or less. However, we have close friends in PS and they say the same.

Good luck OP. I hope you find a good fit for your family.

[Anonymous]

Sure, if it's your husband's religion, which he wants the kids exposed to and you aren't outright opposed to.

I assume you're talking about Catholic school because Episcopal schools tend to be much lighter on daily doctrine. I am Jewish and went to an Episcopal day school and we had chapel three times a week but you could sort of zone out, they didn't require genuflection or mass and you could choose not to sing the hymns (which are beautiful but many are all about Jesus). We had religion classes but they weren't doctrine. We read the Old and New Testaments and took tests with questions like "who did Isaac meet at the well?" and "which Apostle wrote xyz" but it wasn't doctrinaire, like, the Apostle proclaimed xyz and we know that to be the truth and here's the associated catechism. There was none of that. It was presented the same way as any book we read in English classes. It felt less religious than my Hebrew school education, for sure. I chafed at it because I hated the sermons (which were mostly non-religious but to this day I hate sermons and lectures) but I didn't really mind it. (And the hymns were beautiful! I still listen to them as music.)

If I were considering private school for my Jewish kids, I'd consider an Episcopal or Friends school, but i would not do a Catholic school because everyone tells me they weave doctrine into all lessons. It influences science education, health education, everything. I wouldn't be up for that as a Jew. But if one parent shares the faith and you are raising your kid in that faith even in part, or at least you aren't super opposed to it, sure, why not.

[Anonymous]

We are an interfaith (atheist Jew—me—and Christian—DH) family who attends church every Sunday. I like learning about and from the religion. My kid tells my stuff from Sunday school and I can interact positively with it (“Jesus calmed the storm? Well, storms can be scary!”). Ask yourself if you would be able to interact in a positive way with what your kid reports back. If not, that’s not setting up yourself or your kid for a good experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are an interfaith (atheist Jew—me—and Christian—DH) family who attends church every Sunday. I like learning about and from the religion. My kid tells my stuff from Sunday school and I can interact positively with it (“Jesus calmed the storm? Well, storms can be scary!”). Ask yourself if you would be able to interact in a positive way with what your kid reports back. If not, that’s not setting up yourself or your kid for a good experience.

Thanks for offering what seems to me to be a useful perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As parents, just de-program your children as you would with any other principles or beliefs you don't subscribe to. If you watch TV and you don't agree with something, don't you point it out to your child? Most of what they will be exposed to in Catholic ES is about how much Jesus loves them, how much God loves them, and to follow the Golden Rule.

Send them to Sunday school to the religion of your choice so they know what you want them to believe.

The anti-Catholic fear mongering is not helpful.

Except it goes beyond this. Yes, treat people well, god loves you and golden rule but only for Catholics or Christians. Not for non believers . It’s a subtle difference, but it matters. I volunteer, I’m a good person, I’m also an atheist. There are lots of good people who volunteer who are of faith. I enjoy working with many of them. But the sheer number of times people have been shocked when they find out I’m not faithful and then either marvel that I could be an atheist AND want to help others or, more insultingly, declare that I must believe in god otherwise I wouldn’t volunteer and be a good person is staggering. It’s a closed mindedness that comes from associating being a good person with faith. The two can absolutely exist together, but being of faith does not mean being a good person, and being a good person can exist without faith. A lot of Christians don’t think to tell their kids this, or remember/believe it themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As parents, just de-program your children as you would with any other principles or beliefs you don't subscribe to. If you watch TV and you don't agree with something, don't you point it out to your child? Most of what they will be exposed to in Catholic ES is about how much Jesus loves them, how much God loves them, and to follow the Golden Rule.

Send them to Sunday school to the religion of your choice so they know what you want them to believe.

The anti-Catholic fear mongering is not helpful.

I am Catholic and send my child to Catholic school specifically chosen for the academics and history of monk’s teaching success. The teachers and staff are some of the most amoral, uncaring, disrespectful, least supportive people I have every encountered both in a school setting and outside of school. Will not consider another Catholic school and leaving once this school year is up. They are most unprofessional and contradict Catholic moral teachings.
-a Catholic parent

[Anonymous]

No, OP, I would not, unless you want your child to grow up in that religion.

[Anonymous]

Interesting that most PPs jumped in with their stories of Catholic schools when PP did not specify which religion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My should attends a boys 6-12 Catholic school in DC and the staff and teachers are some of the most unkind, hypocritical, and defensive people I’ve dealt with. We will not return after this year and I say that as a Catholic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As parents, just de-program your children as you would with any other principles or beliefs you don't subscribe to. If you watch TV and you don't agree with something, don't you point it out to your child? Most of what they will be exposed to in Catholic ES is about how much Jesus loves them, how much God loves them, and to follow the Golden Rule.

Send them to Sunday school to the religion of your choice so they know what you want them to believe.

The anti-Catholic fear mongering is not helpful.

I am Catholic and send my child to Catholic school specifically chosen for the academics and history of monk’s teaching success. The teachers and staff are some of the most amoral, uncaring, disrespectful, least supportive people I have every encountered both in a school setting and outside of school. Will not consider another Catholic school and leaving once this school year is up. They are most unprofessional and contradict Catholic moral teachings.
-a Catholic parent

Are you switching to a different Catholic or away from religious school?

[Anonymous]

Like another poster above, I would send to Episcopal schools (I love their inclusive approach to faith/ religion). I would not consider catholic or evangelical.