Nonreligious family sending child to religious school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Applicants from small private religious schools (Christian, Muslim or Jewish) tend to stand out among sea of public school applicants. They've an advantage at Ivies and top SLACs. Mostly because their school principals and counselors are really invested in getting them accepted so they can flaunt those statistics to attract more tuition payers while public schools counselors don't care and have too many kids to give individual attention.

This is an opinion, only, and in this case, a false one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are interfaith or not religious yourself, and your spouse is, would you send an elementary school age child to a school that is excellent, but also interweaves the religion into everything on a daily basis?

If they truly do this, I wouldn't send a child there even if of the same religion. It's indoctrination.

This post made me laugh. Almost like indoctrination is the entire point of religious schools.

[Anonymous]

Not for elementary. I did go to a Catholic high school and I am not Catholic, but it was a very special school. I'd send my kids in a heartbeat if I lived near it now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are interfaith or not religious yourself, and your spouse is, would you send an elementary school age child to a school that is excellent, but also interweaves the religion into everything on a daily basis?

NP. We did this. Sent kids to Catholic school. It was an extremely positive experience, and my kids (now late teens/college-aged) have expressed how glad they are they had the experience.

We are atheist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are interfaith or not religious yourself, and your spouse is, would you send an elementary school age child to a school that is excellent, but also interweaves the religion into everything on a daily basis?

NP. We did this. Sent kids to Catholic school. It was an extremely positive experience, and my kids (now late teens/college-aged) have expressed how glad they are they had the experience.

We are atheist.

PP here. Also, my kids moved to Catholic after public school and viewed (and still view) that change as a strong positive change.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are interfaith or not religious yourself, and your spouse is, would you send an elementary school age child to a school that is excellent, but also interweaves the religion into everything on a daily basis?

If they truly do this, I wouldn't send a child there even if of the same religion. It's indoctrination.

This post made me laugh. Almost like indoctrination is the entire point of religious schools.

All school is indoctrination.

[Anonymous]

Yes, Jesuit school. Strong academic tradition, good values, some religion, yes but lots of non Catholics attend.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't, but also, there are considerations like "what are the public schools like?" In northern VA, almost all the public schools are as good or better than the private ones, so the only reason I'd see to shell out the money would be for the religious element.

Literally know a family who put their kids in private religious school to get away from the "bad" neighborhood school, only to transfer them out last year and they found that the local school is more challenging than the private.

[Anonymous]

Well, depends on what school.
Quaker, yes.
Episcopalian, yes.
Catholic, probably not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Every day has prayer and a lot of the reading is thematic, but on our visit the books they read in the class was not religious. I was also impressed with the curricular choices, and the kids were nice.
I liked at least one of the teachers very much. It's hard to say. Am I ready to counterract this at home, and what is the chance that she is an outsider because we don't follow the same protocols at home?
That's the trouble really.

I guess I just don't understand why you would marry someone who is religious if you feel that you need to counteract this at home. Do you undermine your spouse trying to teach them the faith?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Every day has prayer and a lot of the reading is thematic, but on our visit the books they read in the class was not religious. I was also impressed with the curricular choices, and the kids were nice.
I liked at least one of the teachers very much. It's hard to say. Am I ready to counterract this at home, and what is the chance that she is an outsider because we don't follow the same protocols at home?
That's the trouble really.

I guess I just don't understand why you would marry someone who is religious if you feel that you need to counteract this at home. Do you undermine your spouse trying to teach them the faith?

Also, consider that the world your kids live in as adults will be much more secular than today's society.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sure, if it's your husband's religion, which he wants the kids exposed to and you aren't outright opposed to.

I assume you're talking about Catholic school because Episcopal schools tend to be much lighter on daily doctrine. I am Jewish and went to an Episcopal day school and we had chapel three times a week but you could sort of zone out, they didn't require genuflection or mass and you could choose not to sing the hymns (which are beautiful but many are all about Jesus). We had religion classes but they weren't doctrine. We read the Old and New Testaments and took tests with questions like "who did Isaac meet at the well?" and "which Apostle wrote xyz" but it wasn't doctrinaire, like, the Apostle proclaimed xyz and we know that to be the truth and here's the associated catechism. There was none of that. It was presented the same way as any book we read in English classes. It felt less religious than my Hebrew school education, for sure. I chafed at it because I hated the sermons (which were mostly non-religious but to this day I hate sermons and lectures) but I didn't really mind it. (And the hymns were beautiful! I still listen to them as music.)

If I were considering private school for my Jewish kids, I'd consider an Episcopal or Friends school, but i would not do a Catholic school because everyone tells me they weave doctrine into all lessons. It influences science education, health education, everything. I wouldn't be up for that as a Jew. But if one parent shares the faith and you are raising your kid in that faith even in part, or at least you aren't super opposed to it, sure, why not.

Science? Please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As parents, just de-program your children as you would with any other principles or beliefs you don't subscribe to. If you watch TV and you don't agree with something, don't you point it out to your child? Most of what they will be exposed to in Catholic ES is about how much Jesus loves them, how much God loves them, and to follow the Golden Rule.

Send them to Sunday school to the religion of your choice so they know what you want them to believe.

The anti-Catholic fear mongering is not helpful.

It really depends on the school. Most are like that. We looked at one all boys school who said that they would basically target my child into religious and other debates in religion class and it was really absurd given my child had no religious background having to stand up to a grown man who spent all his life studying the bible. I was pretty surprised given what friends told me about the school but the head of the school was very blunt and obnoxious about it. The other teachers seemed warm and inviting where it would not be an issue.

Sounds like he did you a favor. It would have been much worse if they made it seem like everything was going to be great and then they did this kind of stuff behind your back. They were upfront and honest about exactly what you could expect.

Just from that person's language I don't believe her. Can you even imagine a Head of School telling a prospective parent they intend to "target" their child? No. The level of anger from that post tells another story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are interfaith or not religious yourself, and your spouse is, would you send an elementary school age child to a school that is excellent, but also interweaves the religion into everything on a daily basis?

no, religion is a fundamental dividing force in the world. Not sending my child to any religion-related schools, no matter how good they are.

Sounds divisive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are interfaith or not religious yourself, and your spouse is, would you send an elementary school age child to a school that is excellent, but also interweaves the religion into everything on a daily basis?

NP. We did this. Sent kids to Catholic school. It was an extremely positive experience, and my kids (now late teens/college-aged) have expressed how glad they are they had the experience.

We are atheist.

PP here. Also, my kids moved to Catholic after public school and viewed (and still view) that change as a strong positive change.

Same. My kids are not religious, but they really enjoyed the theology classes and the sometimes lively debate. They were also the hardest classes. One parent raised Catholic, one atheist.